


The Mayhew-Grimshaw family. Story 1.

by Margorobron



Category: Coronation Street
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-04
Updated: 2016-07-04
Packaged: 2018-07-21 16:12:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 47,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7394428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Margorobron/pseuds/Margorobron
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is story 1 of Eileen Grimshaw's Boys<br/>The story of Todd and Billy from the beginning to the arrival of their daughter Evie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. From the beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Todd and Billy realise that they are meant to be together and become a family, relieved that Sean also finds himself in a happy ever after situation.

  
Todd was really concerned about Billy. He had unintentionally got him mixed up in his murder cover up on the discovery that Callum’s body was buried under the Platts’ family home. His brother Jason was suspect number one and he knew for sure that he was innocent. But then there was Sarah. No one had pointed a finger at Sarah but he knew her so well, better than anyone probably and sure as hell, Sarah had a guilty secret. Exactly what is was, Todd didn’t know, but it had to be something to do with the murder. He believed that Callum must have raped her, with Harry being the result, but in a moment of anger and frustration at what was happening to her, Sarah must have lashed out. He wanted to clear his brother and also protect Sarah and that was why he created the story. He told the police that the murderer was Jason’s father Tony, who was definitely dead and therefore unable to suffer a prison sentence because of it. Todd tended to hatch a huge scheme and then reflect afterwards on its credibility and this was a classic example. It certainly wouldn’t effect Tony to have a murder charge slapped on him, but what would be the outcome for Jason, having to accept that his father was a murderer? That hadn’t occurred to him until later. Somehow Billy had ended up in amongst this grand cover up and he wasn’t happy about it. So much so that he had told Todd to keep away from him. Somehow that had hurt but he didn’t really know why. When did Billy become important in the grand scheme of things? He liked Billy. He was a genuine person with high morals and a dedication to his job, which happened to be the vicar of the local parish. He had also become Sean’s boyfriend. Sean, who was a resident in Todd’s family home had been on his own for several years and Billy had brought a sparkle to his eye and a spring in his step. That was good to see. At the moment though, it seemed that Sean didn’t know if he were coming or going.  
Billy had a secret and it was such a big deal to him that he didn’t want anyone to know about it. He called it parish business to Sean, who didn’t seem to be getting a look in at the moment. Everything was secret after secret and although Sean had been surprisingly patient, even he was getting to the end of his tether. Then just by chance Todd had stumbled upon the true reason for all the hush hush creeping around. Billy had a brother who he considered to be a very significant priority in his life, but he was a drug addict and that totally shamed Billy. Not only that, but Billy was embarrassed about the way he was handling the situation. He was the one with all the answers. People turned to him for advice and here he was unable to solve his personal problems and this was eating him alive. He hadn’t wanted anyone to know about Lee, but he was now making himself into a local criminal by stealing cash to feed his habit. Billy tried to cover up for it, but Todd got himself involved and Billy had to tell him. He actually didn’t regret that, because he found it strangely reassuring that someone else finally knew. If it had to be someone, then cold scheming Todd might as well be that person. But that was where things started to go wrong. It had been Todd who found Lee collapsed in an alley way and it was Todd who helped him to bundle Lee into his car and rush him off to hospital. In retrospect, how could he have coped without him? He found himself genuinely grateful to Todd, despite having told him to keep away from him after involving him in a murder cover up. But there was more. He had been wrong about Todd. The cold conniving character was actually proviso and Billy discovered that underneath it, Todd was a very gentle caring man, totally loyal and trustworthy. He found he was beginning to lean on him for support and God did he need that at the moment. He would never have said his life was easy, but these current situations must be up at the top of the list of challenges he had ever had to deal with. Knowing that he could call Todd was a terrific crutch in the current insecure crumbling life he found himself dealing with.  
Sean was in bits. He had never felt this low. He hadn’t really seen it coming even though he knew that he was desperately unhappy at the moment. When he met Billy his heart began to flutter and when his new acquaintance actually seemed interested in him, Sean couldn’t believe his luck. He lived in a fairly small community and Sean loved being a part of it. His colleagues at the factory were mainly female and accepted him without question. He considered himself blessed to find himself in such a relaxed atmosphere. No one ever mocked him or pointed a finger. He was definitely one of the gang. Being gay often brought trauma in the workplace, but Sean had nothing to worry about on that front and never a day went by without him thanking his lucky stars that this was the case. That didn’t stop Sean feeling lonely though. There was a club fairly close to the area where gays were accepted without question and he could go there with work mates and feel totally relaxed, but as far as finding a partner within the local community was concerned, he probably hadn’t a hope in hell. Marcus had been special for a while until he fell for Maria and wanted to make a go of it, but then Todd messed with his head. Todd was definitely bad news and Sean lodged in Todd’s family home with his mother and brother. There was absolutely no chance of any kind of romantic encounter there. His fun night out with his co-workers to the afore mentioned club brought him onto a coinciding path with Billy who was new to the area. Surprisingly to Sean they hit it off straight away and when Billy coyly admitted he was the local vicar Sean didn’t feel phased. All this had happened a couple of years ago. He couldn’t say that life within the relationship was in the fast lane, but that was due to Billy being so conscientious as the parish vicar which had to take priority. Sean understood that and he went in to the relationship with his eyes wide open. Recently, however, this was really being put to the test. He hardly ever saw Billy and even when he apologised for his behaviour by asking if they could have lunch together, he bailed on him half way through. Parish work, he said, so Sean ate his meal alone and headed off home. On the way be stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t believe his eyes! Parish work indeed! Could he not see him now in the arms of Todd Grimshaw? What was going on? Was Billy actually cheating on him? Was he being taken for a mug by the local vicar? Him with all his high principles? Sean decided to keep this information to himself. Could he be becoming paranoid? He really didn’t know. When the time was right, he intended to find out.  
Billy found himself heading for Sean’s. He had told him he deserved someone better than him, but Sean argued with him telling him that he understood everything now. He knew why he had lied, so all was well. He obviously thought they would be able to carry on. But Billy knew they couldn’t. He had said no more lies and yet he was lying even now. The biggest secret of all was still hidden. And that was the thought racing round in his head as he walked towards Sean’s. But what was going to happen when he got there? Was he going to actually tell him the full truth this time? Oh no, no, no. No way. He was on his way to see Sean. What exactly did he intend to say if he was in? He would probably think of something. In the meantime, he had to hope he was out. When he got there, he found that only Todd was in. Billy knew Todd was wanting to know whether Sean believed that the problem with Sarah concerned Bethany, so he was able to reassure him of this before sitting on the sofa. It was at that moment that Todd asked the loaded question. He sensed something was wrong but he didn’t have a clue what was coming. Billy was about to drop a bombshell on Todd. The real reason why he couldn’t stay with Sean was because he had fallen for someone else, hook line and sinker. The sad thing was though, it was totally one sided wasn’t it and when Todd found out it was him, how might he react? Billy’s stomach was churning, but he had promised himself he would tell no more lies and that also meant telling the truth, so he took a deep breath and began the big reveal.

Todd’s worry about Sarah escalated on the day of Callum’s funeral. She had nipped out when no one was looking and got a taxi to the church. She was determined to know for sure that Callum had gone. As soon as Sarah’s brother David realised that Sarah was missing, he was at the counter in the florists where Todd worked, demanding he should do something. This was how Todd found himself walking in to St Mary’s Church and sitting down beside Sarah. As he looked a,round he could see the white coffin with Callum’s photograph standing on it. He saw a few people and noted Marian Callum’s mum and Gemma his friend. He could hear people chatting and then realised something was wrong. “Sarah, where’s Billy?” he asked.  
“I don’t know” was the reply. “He was here and then he was gone!”  
Todd analysed this for a moment before realising what had happened.  
“Stay here!” he said to Sarah and he set off down the church and around the side towards the vestry. As he reached the top of the stairs, he saw what he was dreading. Billy was sitting on the floor in a corner, arms wrapped round his knees. He glanced over and saw that the intruder was Todd.” I can’t do this” he said, tears rolling down his face.

Billy had been stood in the church with a small gathering of people wishing to pay their respects to Callum. He had been dreading it ever since Callum’s mum had asked him to lead the service. His mind flashed back to Todd saying it would be ok and he could do this. He also said that if he needed to talk later, he would be there for him. That thought kept him strong. He gave a supportive smile to Callum’s mum and began the welcome. That was when the door opened and his worst nightmare began. Sarah came through and sat in a pew. Sarah, who he thought had been raped by Callum. Sarah, who he thought may have an unwanted child because of that event. Sarah, who might have actually killed him in her panic. As all of this ran through Billy’s mind, his legs felt unsafe and his hands began to tremble. “Get out of here!” he heard someone screaming in his head. “You can’t do this! What are you even doing here anyway? Get out!” And he did. He obeyed what the voice was shouting at him. What more could he do? Without further thought he ran from the chancel out through the door and up the stairs to the vestry. He didn’t even stop to close the door. He ran to the furthest corner and sat on the floor, hugging his knees. He rocked himself gently, eyes closed, tears falling. Then he heard footsteps. “Oh God” he thought. “They’re coming to get me! They will lynch me!” There were members of Callum’s gang down there! But the feet he heard continued towards him with no shouts of anger. He dared to open his eyes and look. Sighing with relief at seeing it was the only person in the world he wanted to see right now, he silently said a thank you to God. “You have sent the only person in the world who has a chance of getting me out there,” he thought. He heard what Todd was saying and he could feel his hand squeezing his shoulder. “You can do this. Come on. For Callum’s mum.” Billy found himself nodding and standing up. Todd disappeared as he straightened out his clothes and glanced in the mirror on the back of the door. Then with a deep breath, he made his way down the stairs towards the lectern. He looked up and found Todd looking at him and giving him an encouraging “you can do it “nod and he recommenced the service.

Sean finished his shift in the pub and decided to have a quick drink before making a laboured journey home. He couldn’t remember when he had felt this low. Billy seemed to have been a part of his life forever. It had never been a passionate arrangement, more like a friendly well -worn jacket, one he wouldn’t want to part with. But that was the big issue. He had indeed parted with it. He had told Billy he had had enough of him lying and covering things up instead of being honest and then he had played the trump card, having told him he had seen him in Todd’s arms. “It’s not what you think” he had said, but he actually dared to ask him to honestly tell him there was nothing between him and Todd and he wouldn’t answer him. That’s when the next words leapt out of his mouth without him having put his brain in gear. “You’re dumped” and he stormed off in to the pub. “If only” kept going through his head, because even when Michelle told him to take time off and sort it, it got no better. In fact, it got even worse, because Billy agreed and said he was right. They needed to quit. He tried to tell him everything was ok and now he understood, but Billy had insisted it was too late. Now he really couldn’t think straight about anything. All he could think about was Billy and “if only.” As he finished his drink, he looked up and saw Billy in the bar. He had been so obsessed with his thoughts that he hadn’t even realised he was there. Poor Billy. He hadn’t heard how the funeral had gone, but by the look of it, Billy really needed cheering up. He went over to him, thinking he might send him away, but he seemed quite glad of the company. He told him that although he realised that there was no “us” any more, he still cared about him and would always be there for him and without thinking he put his hand on his. He was pretty sure that Billy squeezed it back. Then Billy suggested they went to his place to talk. Fireworks went off in Sean’s head at this suggestion. Maybe all is not lost after all. Billy took his hand away and stood up, heading for the door and Sean followed.

Todd came back from the funeral and deposited Sarah safely back with David and Kylie, before returning home. He made himself a brew and sat on the sofa, alone with his thoughts. Moments of peace in this house were few and far between. He started to rewind his afternoon. He smiled as he wondered if Tracy had found out yet that the shop closed early. Well, she’s the boss. Where was she? Had she been there the shop need not have closed. Then he thought of the state Sarah was in. Something was definitely not right there. He had known Sarah a very long time but he had never known her like this. His next thoughts went to the poor broken man in the vestry. Most of that was down to him. The worry about Sarah had been instilled in Billy by him. The cover up for murder framing Tony had been instilled by him. God, even the split up with Sean was down to him! And how did he react when he told him how he felt? He told him to get out. The poor man had bared his very soul to him and that was the best he could do. He hadn’t mentioned it since either, not even in the vestry, even though he knew that if anyone could get Billy back to take that service, it was himself. He hadn’t even given himself time to consider what he had confessed to him. All he could think about was Sean and how could he possibly cope with the situation if he found out. Where the hell did that leave Billy? He knew that Billy wasn’t expecting anything in return, but here he was, Billy no mate himself with no relationship to his name for years. Here was someone telling him amongst the worst situations imaginable that he had fallen for him. Could he really just slap his face and kick him out without even allowing himself a single thought about it? Todd needed to talk to him. Now. He felt maybe be would be drowning his sorrows in the Rovers. He had said to him he would be there after the funeral should be want to talk. Who was be kidding? What would he himself do? Having been that humiliated, would he go back for more? You must be joking! He grabbed his jacket and keys and set off for the rovers. He opened the door and scanned the bar, finding Billy standing by the bar with Sean. It didn’t look like they had been there long and he noted Sean put his hand on Billy’s as Billy smiled back. Had Billy admitted defeat? Was he going to give it another chance? Was that jealousy stirring in the pit of Todd’s stomach? Surely not! Billy was about to stand up, releasing Sean’s hand. Time to move, he thought and he left the pub before he was spotted.

Billy unlocked the front door and Sean followed him inside to the kitchen where he sat at the table. Billy picked up the kettle, preparing to make a brew. A few moments later he put the two mugs on the table apologising for having no biscuits. He felt like he was fumbling over his words. He was trying to analyse the thought process which had found himself sitting in his kitchen drinking tea with Sean. He was suddenly aware that Sean was speaking. He was asking how the funeral went. He couldn’t actually tell him. Another lie already? Billy hesitated as Sean watched him expectantly.  
He fidgeted with his fingers clasped on the table and stared at them intently.  
“One of the worst days of my life.” he replied quietly. Sean’s face reflected the pain he shared from that reply. He reached for Billy’s hands.  
“I’m so sorry, Billy” he said. “It must have been really awful for you.” Billy nodded but didn’t make eye contact or respond to Sean trying to hold his hands. Sean carried on.  
“Was it really that hard for you?” he asked.  
Billy closed his eyes, trying to stop the tears from flowing. He nodded again.  
“Could you use a hug?” Sean offered. Billy covered his face with his hands, elbows on the table. He pressed his fingers into his eyes, desperately trying to regain control. Sean felt uncomfortable as his hug had been refused and he didn’t know what to do. He leaned over and rubbed the top of Billy ‘s arm, but nothing changed. After a couple minutes he could hear Billy breathing deeply and he then put his hands back on the table. He opened his eyes but did not attempt eye contact.  
“Sean” he said huskily in a very quiet voice Sean could only just hear. “I’m sorry I asked you back. I hadn’t expected to be like this. Everything is a bit much today. Thank you for coming. I’m sorry not to have been more hospitable. Could you please let yourself out? “  
“I could stay and keep you company” he said. “I don’t mind if you aren’t very sociable. That’s what I’m here for. To support you.”  
Billy shook his head. “I’m sorry” he said. “Please go.”  
Sean took his hand off Billy’s arm and slowly stood up.  
“Well I’ll see you around then “he said, but got no acknowledgement. With a soft “bye” he awkwardly made his way to the front door. When Billy heard the front door shut the flood gates opened.  
“Oh Sean” he said “I’m so sorry.” A few seconds later he fumbled in his jacket pocket for his phone and with shaky hand, he squinted at the keys and dialled.  
“Hello” he said trying to gain composure. “You said you would be there for me. Please. I need you.”  
Something was said at the other end and he replied. “I’m at home. After a further reply he said “Thank you. Make sure you don’t bump.in to Sean.” He rang off, put the phone down and buried his head in his arms on the table, sobbing bitterly.

Todd grabbed his jacket and keys and just got to the door as his mum, Jason and Pat Phelan arrived home.  
“Hello love. Just going out?” asked Eileen.  
“Yes” said Todd. “I’ve got my keys so don’t wait up.”  
“Ok. Off somewhere nice?” she asked.  
“No not really” was the reply and that was when Sean arrived very red eyed.  
“Sean what’s up?” asked Eileen.” My life is over!” he said ,sobbing heartily and throwing himself up the stairs to bed. Todd left all the hustle and bustle behind and walked briskly towards Billy’s, afraid of what he was going to find once again. This was certainly becoming a habit! He reached the front door and knocked. A moment later he heard the catch turn and the door open slightly. As nothing else happened, he gently pushed the door open, revealing Billy standing straight against the wall in the hall way. He closed the front door and approached Billy. The hall light wasn’t on and there was no window, but there was light coming through from the kitchen. He could see that Billy’s eyes were closed and he was shaking because of crying. He came close to him and laid a featherweight hand on each of Billy’s arms. Without moving, Billy said barely audibly, “Help me Todd, please help me!” Todd grabbed Billy and wrapped his arms around him, pulling him off the wall he was leaning against. Immediately his legs began to buckle, so Todd allowed him to sink to the floor, moving slowly with him, until they were both sitting, Billy now clinging onto Todd’s jacket, Todd his arms tightly round him. He gently rocked him as the silent tears turned into sobs of despair. Todd rubbed small circles on Billy s back with one hand and the other gently caressed his neck as he pulled his head over to rest on his shoulder. This continued for some time. Todd wasn’t counting. He had said not to wait up at home, so no one would be looking for him. He was going to make it up to Billy for the way he had been behaving, especially his reaction to the declaration which caused him to cringe even now as be thought how cruel he had been. Billy had been so brave to confess that, only to be thrown out of the house. Todd needed to tell him. It was important. Billy was no longer crying and seemed much calmer. He took a deep breath and slowly broke the hug so that he could talk.  
“Thank you” he mumbled. “I don’t know what I would have done if you had refused to come.”  
“Why would I refuse?” asked Todd. “You paid me the biggest compliment anyone could give me.”  
“It wasn’t a compliment” said Billy. “It was me being honest.”  
“It amounts to the same thing” said Todd. “Shall we go into the kitchen? Have a brew perhaps?  
I need to talk to you.”  
Billy finally made eye contact with Todd. “No. Please,” he pleaded. “I can’t take any more”  
“It’ll be ok. I promise” assured Todd. “Shall I go in and put the kettle on?” After a nod, Todd stood up and moved towards the kitchen. He filled the kettle and then picked up the mugs from the table and took them over to the sink, just as Billy appeared, pulling out a chair. He leaned his elbows on the table with his head in his hands. Todd spotted the tea bags and found the milk in the fridge before waiting for the kettle to boil. He brought two mugs of tea to the table and then sat down. He put his hand on Billy s arm to get his attention. Billy took his hands down and seeing the mug, wrapped his hands around it.  
“Billy” Todd began. Billy made eye contact, saying, “I meant it. I can’t take any more. Please don’t hurt me.”  
“I’ve already done too much of that!” said Todd “and I can’t apologize enough. I’m disgusted with myself. I can’t believe what I did. I’m really not a heartless person Billy.”  
“Of course you’re not. You are a warm gentle person. Why do you think I fell for you?” He gasped. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that.”  
“But do you mean it?” Todd asked.  
Billy was horrified. “Do I really seem that shallow that I would joke about that?” he asked. looking into Todd s eyes, but finding them so deep be had to look away.  
“No” said Todd “but I just want to know where you stand. It might have been caused through having had an emotional day and it wasn’t meant to have been said.  
“Oh my God! You can say that again! I never intended you to know. It just felt like a teenage crush initially, but then I realised how deeply I had fallen. And I’m sorry.”  
“Why are you sorry?” Todd asked.  
“Because you don’t want this. It made you angry. It made you embarrassed.”  
“Billy, stop will you?” said Todd and then repeated quietly, “Just stop.”  
He reached over and put both his hands on Billy’s cheeks and drew him close. He kissed him lightly on the lips and then drew back again. He then repeated a little stronger and Billy gave a slight response but broke away.  
“Todd, please don’t do this” he said. “I can’t take your pity.” Todd removed his hands from Billy cheeks.  
“You think this is pity? Billy I don’t do pity. I only give out what I feel. Come here!” Billy moved towards Todd. “Kiss me.” he said gently and Billy obeyed, very gently.  
“Is that it?” asked Todd.” Is that how you show you have fallen for someone?”

“Well no, I..... Todd I don’t understand. Please explain. I promised to keep it back and I said I wouldn’t expect anything in return. I respect that you can’t return my feelings.”  
“Well there you go again, assuming!” said Todd. “The way I’m seeing it, I would be absolutely stupid to ignore this. I haven’t had anyone tell me they loved me in quite a few years. I’ve been on my own. Do you think I should ignore this and stay on my own or should I at least meet it half way? I’m not saying I love you. I can’t. All I can say is I like you and as I’ve got to know you, I have come to like you a lot. My immediate problem is Sean. This suggests it’s got to remain hidden until I get the courage to tell him. But I will tell him, I promise. I don’t like dirty little secrets. Are we clear on this now?” Billy nodded. “So I will say it again. Kiss me. Please.”  
This time Billy put a hand on Todd’s cheek and moved close and there followed a passionate kiss which took both of their breath away. When they broke the kiss, they were panting.  
“Oh my God” said Todd. “That was amazing!”  
Billy said, “I have never experienced that before.”  
“What?” said Todd, “Billy you are one day out of a steady relationship. What do you mean you’ve never experienced that before?”  
Billy looked down. “We er haven’t been very physical” he said, looking away.  
“How do you mean?” Todd had to ask. “You kiss surely?”  
“Well yes, but you might he surprised. Despite how out there Sean seems to be, he actually isn’t in that department. That’s mainly down to me to be honest. We began the relationship with me laying down the law because of my job and not wanting to make him public knowledge. So it’s just carried on from there really.”  
Billy, I don’t need to know this and you don’t have to tell me but I’m bursting to ask you. You have slept together haven’t you?” There was no reply and Billy refused to make eye contact. “My God! You’ve been together for about ages and....”  
Todd moved in for another kiss, this time resting his hands on Billy’s thighs. He drew circles with his thumbs, slowly moving them higher up until he touched his target very gently. Without breaking the kiss, he got off his chair and knelt between Billy’s thighs, his hands now on his hips. Billy’s eyes were closed and he saw nothing, but he could feel Todd’s body against the insides of his thighs. Todd untucked Billy’s shirt at both sides and put his hands on Billy’s bare waist, moving them around in feather light touches. The hands moved up under the shirt and Billy thrust suddenly as Todd tweaked his nipples. Billy broke the kiss and opened his eyes.  
“Shit Todd!” he exclaimed. Todd almost whispered in reply. “Billy do you want this? Tell me now if you want me to stop.”  
Billy got hold of Todd’s jacket which he hadn’t quite got round to taking off and then Todd put his arms up as Billy removed his shirt and T shirt. Todd went to do the same, but Billy stopped him to remove his collar. Billy put his hands round Todd’s neck to draw him closer but Todd stopped him to remove the shirt and T shirt. He then leaned forward to tease one of Billy s nipples with his tongue, tweaking the other between his thumb and finger. Billy continued to thrust. cupping his groin as he did so. Todd moved in to Billy’s belt and undid it before stopping again. “Billy, tell me you want this. before it’s too late to stop.” Billy breathlessly muttered, “Don’t stop. For God’s sake, don’t stop!”  
Todd undid Billy’s flies and found the contents easily, rushing to be free. Todd teased with his tongue tasting pre cum already.  
“Take it, please!” gasped Billy and Todd complied. “I’m sorry” Billy tried to say. “I’m very close.”  
Todd took Billy fully in his mouth, moving within his rhythm. He reached down with one finger following around to touch his rim. He circled it with his finger before inserting slightly. This was too much for Billy. Billy shouted out and Todd concentrated on the shaft, drinking back what Billy offered. Billy immediately honed in for a deep kiss, one hand in Todd’s hair and the other on his cheek. He moved off the chair and onto the floor breaking the kiss, as his hand moved to Todd’s chest. He pulled Todd with him as he lay on the floor, exploring the outside of his jogging bottoms. Todd put his arms around Billy and placed feather light kisses along his jaw line and neck. Billy reached inside for Todd and began working on him. He caressed Todd’s chest and tongued his right nipple causing Todd to jump before he attacked the other nipple, nipping it gently. Todd groaned. Billy moved back to the kisses on Todd’s neck as his hand quickened its pace. He removed his hand and replaced it with his tongue, flicking and teasing and including very gentle nips, before moving in for the kill. His hands explored below, tweaking and stroking until Todd suddenly grabbed Billy’s shoulders, his eyes tightly closed. Once again Billy swallowed all that was offered as Todd s head fell back. Billy felt the scratching on his shoulder at the same time. Todd s head came back as he brought Billy back in to a gentle loving hug. His head tucked into his neck. Billy reciprocated.  
“I love you” Billy whispered in Todd’s ear. “I thought I did but now I’m sure. Todd pulled back from the hug. He spoke very gently. “You know I can’t say it back” he said. Billy went to reply, so Todd put his finger on Billy’s lips to silence him.” I can’t say it back” he continued. “Not at this time. But if you are that convinced about me, I’m thinking I should feel the same about you, but you need to give me time. Will you do that for me Billy?” He removed the finger and Billy replied.” I can give you as long as you like and I just hope that you reach the same conclusion.”  
“I can’t see why not.” Todd replied. He put both hands on Billy s cheeks.  
“You are a lovely man, Billy Mayhew” he said “and if you were mine, I would want to show you off to the world. I can’t think what Sean’s been doing all this time. This was so special tonight. You made me feel things which have been missing in my life for a very long time. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for that. I feel so much love for you right now but I’m not in love with you. I know you understand what I’m saying and as soon as it changes I will let you know.”  
Billy nodded and smiled.  
“I must go home” Todd said.” I’ve no idea what the time is.” Todd stood up and picked up his T shirt and shirt before putting them on and grabbing his jacket. He walked to the door with Billy following him. Todd opened it and turned on the doorstep, putting his hand once again on Billy’s face, giving him a loving kiss which Billy returned, putting his hands on Todd’s arms. As they broke the kiss, Todd said “Goodnight my lovely man. You are so special.”  
Billy brushed his hand through Todd’s hair. “As are you” he replied. “Good night and thank you for coming. “  
“Sweet dreams” Todd replied and set off down the road. As he reached the corner, Todd turned and they both waved as Todd disappeared round the corner.  
Billy locked up and went straight to his bedroom, exhausted after his busy day. As his head touched the pillow, he felt like sugar plums were dancing in his head and all his Christmases had come at once. He prayed out loud, “God you are so great. How could I have even dreamed of such a perfect ending to the day from hell. I thank you for bringing Todd to me. I ask love and blessings to surround him always.” And with that, Billy fell asleep.

Sean was in his bedroom going over his visit to Billy’s. He had been so relieved when Billy asked him to go back to his to talk. He felt optimistic that if they were talking, Billy hadn’t drawn a total line underneath them. He wanted the chance to prove to him that he could be relied on and he understood the privacy required for him to fulfil his job. He just wanted the opportunity to let Billy see it. All this was going round in his mind as he walked with Billy to his house. He was beside him and yet there seemed to be a chasm between them. All he had tried to do was to repair any rift between them and get back to normal. He had had more apologies from him, but that was all he had brought home with him. No recompense. Nothing positive. He gathered he had had a hard day, but what about his own day? Every day was going to be hard from now on, because there was no Billy. He was his reason for living. He mattered so much to him. But surely there was more to this split than he had been told. It must be more than Bethany being bullied at school and a brother having to go to hospital. He was sure he was missing something. “You’re a joke Billy Mayhew. That’s all I can say. You’re a pain in the neck. What did I see in you? Why did I bother? Why were we together all that time? What if I don’t want to give up on this?” Sean asked himself. He could feel his face burning and his eyes beginning to sting. “Time to walk away, Sean!” he said to himself. He rubbed his eyes hard with his clenched fist and he thought he should be asleep, so he lay on the bed. He knew before he tried that this wasn’t going to work, but he thought he would give it a go. After a lot of tossing and turning, Sean admitted defeat and still fully dressed, took himself downstairs. He turned on the lights in the living room and dining room, made a mug of tea and picked up the TV remote, turning the volume down really low. After a while of trying to select a programme, his eyes grew heavy and he did nod off to sleep. And that’s where Todd found him when he tried to creep in Luckily he managed to get upstairs, without waking him and he got himself to bed with a huge smile on his face. Todd hadn’t felt this happy in forever!


	2. The story continues

Chapter two. The story continues.

Billy was in the Rovers having a quiet drink. He knew Todd kept glancing at him, but Sean was working tonight and he was trying desperately to keep a hand on things. He finished his drink and headed towards the gents, passing Todd on the way and giving him a knowing stare. He used the urinal and went to the basin hoping Todd had realised that he wanted him to follow. The door burst open and Todd arrived. He looked around before grabbing Billy’s face with both hands as Billy put both of his hands on Todd's waist and the kissing began. It was a desperate type of contact and it seemed both men knew it. The urgency was electric. Billy’s hand moved down to feel Todd’s bulge through his joggers fingering his length between thumb and forefinger. Todd gulped, reaching out to do the same. He found it impossible through jeans, so Todd pulled away from the kiss and breathlessly muttered “Cubicle.” They transferred to a cubicle and continued, repeating the experience of the previous night, ending with a loving hug. Billy pointed out that he was already beginning to understand Sean’s initial frustrations at being hidden away. Billy had been the new vicar in the area and being gay was a big issue to mix into that particular cooking pot, let alone bringing along the boyfriend. This was only the first day of this new secret relationship which had found itself hiding in the gents at the Rovers. He expressed his concerns to Todd, pointing out that as he had said, this was something to be shouted about from the rooftops, not confined to the gents. It was Todd thinking on his feet as usual who came up with a solution. He said that he would go to bed as usual tonight, but wait until everyone was asleep and then go over to Billy’s. They could do whatever they wanted to do in private, but they could also have the added bonus of actually sleeping together. He would then set the alarm and get back home to be there getting breakfast when the family got up. He reckoned he would be able to get away with that, but possibly not every night - if that was what Billy would want. Billy kissed him with passion telling him he is a genius and agreeing it is exactly what he wants. That very night would be the initial trial. Todd would text Billy as he left and Billy would put the door on the catch. With a final kiss and a sharing of “I love you/ You’re lovely,” which had become their lines of dedication to each other, they parted, with Todd going straight home through the back way and Billy returning to the bar. If Sean had noticed how long he had been gone, he didn’t comment. Billy ordered another pint which he drank quite quickly and left.  
Todd had gone to his room at about 10.30 last night and listened until the last person had gone to bed. He waited a while and then visited the bathroom for a further check that all was still, before grabbing his jacket and finding his way downstairs in the dark. He put on his shoes and picked up his keys before quietly going through the front door, stopping to send a text and then striding briskly up the street. He had spent his first whole night with Billy and it had been perfect. They had had a night cap and gone to bed, taking their relationship to the next level, which Billy had prepared for by purchasing lube and condoms. They both felt totally committed to the relationship and completely loved up, as Todd set his alarm and they cuddled up together to sleep. They were both so relaxed and happy in each other’s company that they slept well. When the alarm went off they begrudgingly got out of bed after kisses and cuddles to share the first brew of the day. Todd then ventured out on to the still sleepy streets to be at home before the family surfaced, having agreed to the same arrangement for tonight. After a final hug and kiss, Todd left and Billy guiltily went back to bed for another hour. Todd’s plan worked perfectly. He showered and dressed and went down to make a further cup of tea which he drank at the kitchen table, replaying his night time adventure, before getting a bowl of cereal. He was almost finished before the sounds of alarms started to go off in the house. Eileen was the first to appear down the stairs.  
“Oh my!” she said, “Has there been a fire I wasn’t aware of? Did you put it out single handedly?  
Todd gave her a look and carried on eating the dregs of his cereal. His mum headed towards the kettle and took out bowls and plates for the family, before hunting for bread, butter and bacon to start cooking the breakfast. Todd declined a bacon butty and put his bowl by the sink, before taking himself back upstairs. It was going to be a very long day, even though he had work to go to and in this street one never really knew at this stage what the day might bring. He checked out the time and lay on his bed to write a text to Billy. He thanked him for the night before and again told him how beautiful he was and how important he had already become to him. He shared how long a day it was going to be before he saw him again. He then told him he must delete this message once he had read it, reminding him of the messages going to self-destruct on the cartoon series Inspector Gadget which he loved as a boy. He sat and waited in case there was a reply but nothing came. Time for work, he thought and went downstairs, where Jason, Pat and his mum were still sitting at the table. There was no sign of Sean. “Your lunch is here Todd,” Eileen said, picking it up and holding it out to him. He smiled to himself thinking how lucky he was that his mum still prepared his packed lunch for him. Just at this moment there wasn’t much in his life he would want to change. Best make the most of that, he thought to himself. I’m sure this won’t last for long. He thanked his mum and said goodbye getting mutters of reply from the two men at the table and a light response from his mum accompanied by a smile. He was becoming really glad to get out of that house at the moment. There seem to be a cloud of pressure hanging over it. Well that’s something he would like to change already, but then he knew how to do that and he wasn’t ready to face Sean yet.  
Billy s day began with making his breakfast, a huge grin permanently seeming to be on his face. He must watch that, he told himself or people might begin to notice and he couldn’t have that.Todd wasn’t ready for Sean to know. He couldn’t go against that. He had left that decision up to him and he couldn’t afford to rock the boat. He finished his food and took his tea into his study, opening the parish diary to check what he should be doing today. It looked like a reasonably straight forward day. He planned to call in to the ladies group to show them he was still alive and he had to meet a family at 4.30 about their baby’s christening and somewhere in between he must write down some notes for his sermon on Sunday. All in all, not bad as far as a vicar's day goes. He allowed himself a repeat of the highlights from last night and started to grin again, as his phone began to ring. David was frantically screaming at him from the other end, asking if he had seen Sarah, because she had vanished. She wasn’t at home, he had checked with Todd and he hadn’t seen her and Harry was still with his mum where she had left him to buy some milk., but that was over an hour ago. Billy said he would meet up with him and help him search, but he had no idea where she might be. He grabbed his jacket and keys and left the house. He met David in the street looking very anxious as they both agreed they had no idea where to look. Todd appeared in the doorway of the florist asking if there was any news. Billy and David went over to the shop just as Billy’s phone tinkled to say he had a new message. Billy opened his phone to read it. He made a gasping noise and put his hand to his mouth. He was vaguely aware of Todd calling his name and was partially aware of Todd grabbing his wrist and taking the phone from him. He crouched down and covered his face with his hands, his brain semi switching off. He couldn’t deal with what he read. If he ignored it, maybe it would go away.

Todd had Billy's phone in his hand re reading, trying to take it in. David was asking what was wrong and did it concern Sarah. It did. He finally told him that she had been kidnapped, for a thousand pound ransom.  
“What???” shouted David, Who the hell would kidnap Sarah. And where would we get a thousand pounds!”  
Todd looked down at Billy curled over, hands over the back of his head. He had to try to get through to him. He put Billy’s phone in his own pocket, crouched down in front of him and took hold of his wrists to remove his hands and hopefully communicate. “Billy “he said softly.” Come on. You have to help find her. Billy!” Todd put his hands on Billy’s cheeks to try to raise his head. How was this possibly going to be resolved and how could he even begin to expect Billy to sort it? Todd was talking at Billy,  
“Where would he be? Where has he taken her? Where does he live?” Todd said it all without stopping for breath. Then he became aware of David shouting to him.  
“I’m trying to get information” he replied to him and then returned to Billy.  
“Billy, I don’t know what to do. I can’t leave you like this but I have to go and look for Sarah,” he said.  
“Come on. Speak to me Billy.” He looked up at David and back to Billy. “Right, I’m going to have to call Sean.”  
“No, no! Please don’t! A response at least, Todd thought.  
“I’ve got no choice” he said, “I can’t leave you here on your own.”  
“I’m coming with you!” Billy said.  
“What in this state? What’s the point? You would be a liability!”  
“But he’s probably taken her to his place. You don’t know where he lives!” Billy argued his case.  
“Would you two please cut the domestic?” David yelled. “I want to find my sister.”  
“Fine” said Todd. “You are ready to come now are you?” Billy nodded.  
“Ok then.” Todd got up and held out a hand to Billy. Billy took it but he couldn’t get up. Todd shook his hand free and put his hands under Billy's armpits and tugged with all his might. Somehow it worked and Billy got to his feet but was clinging on to him, unable to stand up.  
David was fast losing patience. “What the hell is going on?” he demanded.  
“David, there’s this chap, a down and out, sort of but he’s also a druggie. Billy befriended him but now all be wants is money to buy more drugs. Somehow be must have seen Billy with Sarah and come up with this plan. Billy thinks he’s probably taken her to his place so he can take us there.”  
“It doesn’t look like he could take us to the Rovers and we are almost outside!” David snarled.  
“Well it’s the best idea we’ve got isn’t it!” said Todd snappily. Now he had two people to worry about and not just Sarah! “How are we going to get there?” asked David.“How far is it?”  
Todd repeated the question to Billy. “Do we walk or drive?”  
“We need a car” said Billy. “We can go in mine.”  
“Don’t be ridiculous! You can’t drive in this state!” Todd said. “I will drive and you can direct.”  
“I didn’t know you had a car” said David. “I don’t.” said Todd, “but I have a full licence. I will have to drive Billy’s. We need to get going and we need to get to the car.” Then he said to Billy. “You’ve got your keys with you?” There was a mutter from Billy whose head was on Todd’s shoulder and his arm around his neck, being unable to stand without Todd’s support. “So we had better do this. Much against my better judgement!”  
Just are that moment Todd heard a phone going off. It was Billy s and it was in his pocket. “Hang on!” he said and took out the phone.  
“What now?” sighed David.  
“It’s him again” Todd said. “He’s saying he’s waiting. At the moment he said she thinks she’s just waiting for Billy but in a minute he’s going to tie her up.”  
“Noooo!” howled Billy, almost falling to the ground. Todd was really struggling to keep him up. “Billy I can’t do this.” He said. “You’re a dead weight.”  
“I’m sorry. I’m trying to walk, honestly.” Billy said breathlessly. “Can I get the car and you wait here?” asked David.  
“Oh yes. Billy, give me your car keys.”  
Todd attempted to search Billy’s pockets, trying to keep him standing at the same time. He finally found them and threw them to David. “You know his car?” he asked “and where to find it?” “I’ll find it” shouted David running off.  
“Has he gone?” Billy asked. “Yes” said Todd. “Are we alone?” “Yes we are” Todd replied. With a lot of effort, Billy looked up at him and gazed into his eyes. “ I don’t know what I would do without you” he said and he put his hand on his cheek.  
“Billy mate, you can’t do this here. Someone might tell Sean!” Todd said looking round.  
“I’m sorry. I don’t think you know how it feels. It physically hurts. Did you know that? Because I didn’t. I’ve never felt like this before. Ever.”  
“We can talk about this tonight Bill,” he said. “We have to concentrate on getting you into your car and sorting out Sarah.”  
“I know. I understand how bad it is. I just ........ I can’t help it. I’m sorry. I’m hurting Todd. Physically hurting.”  
“I know.” Todd said, gently rubbing Billy’s arm. He had a quick look round and saw no one, so took a chance and kissed Billy’s cheek. “I’ll make it up to you. Promise.”  
“You’re so good to me” Billy said as David arrived. “Ah good. David’s here.” Said Todd. Let’s get you in the car.” They made their way carefully to the car as David got in the back seat.  
With a lot of talking, they worked as a team to try to get Lee to back down, which he was glad to do because Sarah seemed so far away. She was totally oblivious to everything that was going on.  
“Look” said Lee and went over to shove Sarah. She didn’t register it happening. “What’s wrong with her?” “I think she’s having a nervous breakdown” said Todd. “David, I suggest we call an ambulance.  
“Agreed” said David. “I’ll do it.”  
Lee looked at Billy sitting silently on the chair.  
Todd went closer to Lee while David was occupied in ringing an ambulance. “You are making him ill, Lee” he said. “You’re sending him down the same path as Sarah, but be hasn’t got as far as she has. But I’ll tell you this now. If it does happen and I find out it’s down to you I’ll be straight on the phone and have you arrested. Don’t think you will get away with it with me. You aren’t my brother!! I hope you’ve got that because I sure won’t forget I’ve said it. Stop asking Billy for money. He doesn’t have any to give you.” Todd grabbed Lee by the scruff of the neck and dragged him to his feet.  
“I said have you got it.??” “Yes! Yes! shrieked Lee and Todd threw him back down on the chair.  
He then went over to Billy and put his hand on his shoulder. “We can go home now” he said. “Job done. David’s sorting an ambulance for Sarah.” “Has he hurt her? Billy asked. David came back in at that moment and went over to his sister sitting unmoving on the chair. He crouched down beside her, his hand on her knee. “Sarah?” he called her. “Can you hear me? Oh Sarah, please answer me?”  
There was hammering on a door then, so David went to answer it. Two paramedics followed him back to the room. David was panicking too. He didn’t know what treatment Sarah was likely to have but he was pretty sure that at some point Callum would be mentioned, so it wouldn’t be long before Kylie was going to be on a murder charge. He couldn’t pretend nothing was wrong though and bundle Sarah back home. She was way past doing that.  
The paramedics were talking to Sarah but she wasn’t responding. One of them turned to David. “Are you a relative?” he asked. “I’m her brother” David replied.” We are going to take her to the assessment unit to sort out the best treatment for her” he said “and I could do with a relative coming too, to give permission if necessary, because I don’t think Sarah can answer for herself.” “That’s ok” said David. “Can I come with you in the ambulance? I don’t have a car at the moment.”  
One of the paramedics got a chair to take Sarah to the ambulance. Todd was watching with his hand constantly on Billy’s shoulder. “David” he called, “I’ll keep in touch, OK?” he said.  
“Ok”, said David glancing at Billy “but it looks like you’ve got your hands full. These two could be sharing a bed!” He then turned his attention back to Sarah as she was strapped into the chair and he followed her to the ambulance.  
Todd squeezed Billy’s shoulder. “We need to go” he said. “Sarah’s safe now. Can you walk to the car?” Billy looked up at him slowly. “I’ll try” was the whispered reply. Billy held on to the offered arm and pulled himself up from the chair, steadying himself using Todd s shoulders. Todd dragged Billy’s arm around his shoulder, putting his other arm around his waist. They slowly walked towards the door. As he reached it, Todd shouted over to Lee. “See what you’ve done you bastard? You’ve broken him!” Billy didn’t attempt to turn to Lee. As he walked, unnoticed tears were falling down his face. “You’d better remember what I said!” he called over as they continued walking. Once Billy was safely in the passenger’s seat, he rushed round to the driver’s side and got in the car. He debated whether he should try to comfort Billy, but decided to get him home first, so belted them both up and started the car.  
Todd drove back to Billy’s and in the same way as before, helped him in to the sitting room and on to the sofa. He then went back to lock the car and close the front door. He went into the kitchen and turned on the kettle, getting two mugs ready to make tea before returning to the sitting room, where Billy hadn’t moved. Gentle tears were still spilling down his cheeks. Todd sat down and pulled Billy over, wrapping his arms tightly around him, his head on his chest. He rubbed his back , kissed his forehead gently and rocked him.  
“My poor beautiful man. How dare he do this to you” he said. “Don’t worry. I’ll take care of you” he told him. “It’s going to be ok. Don’t worry” Billy looked up into Todd’s face.  
“Do you mean it?” he asked. “Do you really mean it?”  
“Of course I mean it” said Todd. Billy began to really sob. “I love you” he muttered.  
“I love you too, Billy” said Todd. “I love you too.”  
Todd held Billy to him and started to hum gently, rocking and smoothing Billy’s hair. He gradually felt Billy calm down until his breathing became deeper and Todd knew he was asleep. He very carefully got up, grabbing a cushion and putting it under Billy’s head. There was a throw on the arm chair which he put over him and then he went into the kitchen to make himself a mug of tea. He went to his pocket for his phone and found it was Billy’s, which he put on the table. He then found his own and dialled the florist number. He held the phone away from his ear as Tracy hurled all sorts at him because she came out of the back room and found that he had gone. He explained that a friend had been hurt in a car accident and he had no one to look after him, so he had to dash to the hospital before he could be released. He added that he needed a week of his leave starting now. He was sorry for the short notice, but he had no choice as his friend really needed him. He apologised again when Tracy said “Don’t do it again!” and put the phone down. He then found his mum’s number, texting her that Tracy had given him a week off and he had made the most of it and gone away for a few days. He would keep in touch though. He wanted to call the bishop next, but decided he must wait for Billy to wake up to do that, so he sat and drank his tea, deep in thought. He went over what he had said to Billy. I love you too. What did he mean by that? Did he just mean that he loved him or was there something more? He had a feeling he really was falling for him. He just felt it was far too soon to say that. He had only been with him a couple of days. That’s not how it works surely. Once his tea was gone, Todd took himself back into the sitting room and settled into the armchair, closing his eyes and drifting into a light sleep.  
Time passed and Billy began to stir. He suddenly remembered what had happened and he remembered that Todd had been with him. He tried to remember what Todd had said to him. He seemed to think he was going to look after him. What did he mean by that? He considered he must now be on his own. He noted the cushion and the throw. Todd must have done that before he left. “How sweet of him. He is so caring,” he thought, realising that people never saw that side of his special man. He smiled to himself at the thought as he stretched his legs. Within a second he was aware of someone kneeling down on the floor beside him and he felt a gentle finger brushing his cheek. He looked at Todd who smiled at him.  
“Hi beautiful” he said and bent down to kiss him gently.  
“I hadn’t realised you were still here” Billy said.  
“I’m not going anywhere” Todd replied. “I’m afraid you are stuck with me!”  
“Stuck with you? Oh God, if you only knew how important you are to me” he said.” You being here is just a dream, even if it is only temporary.”  
“Who said it is temporary?” asked Todd.  
“It must be nearly tea time” Billy said. “You’ll need to go home for your tea.”  
“Billy,” Todd began. “I’m not going home for tea. I’m not going home this evening. I’m not going home tonight and I’m not going home at breakfast time either.” Billy was totally confused. Todd put his hand on Billy hair again and played with it gently. Billy reached up and caressed Todd’s cheek.  
“I’m here for a week” Todd announced, assuming that’s what you wanted.”  
“But you’ve got work to go to and Eileen will be wondering where you are!” he maintained.  
“I told Tracy a friend had been in a car accident and needed someone to be with him or he couldn’t be released from the ward, so I had gone took after him. I text mum and told her Tracy had given me a week off so I had gone away for a few days.”  
“All this for me?” asked Billy.” But why?”  
“Because I’m going to get you through this. You can’t do it on your own,” Todd replied.  
“So this is out of pity” Billy states.  
“No!” said Todd moving closer. “Well, if I’m being totally honest, I do believe that up until today, everything that’s been going on for you was down to me, but not today. This is all down to Lee.  
“So it is out of pity.”  
“Oh come on Billy. Do I really act this way normally? Have you ever seen it? Honestly?” Todd asked.  
“Well no.” Billy had to agree with that.  
“Billy, I’m here because I love you, you prat!” He avoided Billy’s eyes, “In fact, I think I’m falling..... I’ve never felt this much love for anyone before. I can’t understand it because it’s so quick, but I have to accept what I feel. And I have never felt this way before. The way you were this afternoon hurt me so much. I did actually feel pain, like you said. If that pain continues I never want to leave. I couldn’t bear it, physically as well as mentally.”  
“I can’t believe what I’m hearing” Billy whispered. “Pinch me. I must be dreaming!”  
Todd bent down and kissed Billy who returned the kiss. “You are not dreaming!” he said. “Anything but!”  
He pulled the throw back off Billy.” Let’s see how you’re doing” he said. “How much strength have you got back?”  
Billy took his legs off the sofa and tried to stand up. With one hand on the arm of the sofa and the other hand on Todd’s arm he managed it.  
“Brilliant!” said Todd. “Well done!” Billy’s arms were wrapped around Todd’s neck. They kissed intimately. “Let’s see if you can walk, said Todd, finding that once he removed his arms, Billy could shuffle along and he made his way to the kitchen chair.  
“I’ll make us a brew” said Todd, switching on the kettle. Billy watched the whole exercise. “Haven’t you seen anyone make tea before?” Todd asked without turning, knowing Billy was watching him.  
“You’re the only thing moving!” said Billy. “There’s nothing else to watch! Todd returned to the table with the tea. “You should call the bishop” Todd states. “You need a week off. You have to get over today’s ordeal. Properly.”  
Billy laughed. “ What you really mean is that you want me to yourself for a week!” he said.  
“There’s quite a lot of truth in that!” Todd laughed. “But seriously, will you call him? Please? You need to do this.”  
“I’ll do it now” said Billy and picked his phone up from the table. He told the bishop that he had had a funny turn and had felt really unwell for a day, so he would appreciate time off to get over it and he has never asked for a holiday. The bishop gave the week off his blessing and told him to rest. He would send a replacement to sort the Sunday services.  
“Ideal” said Todd smiling. I’ve got nothing with me. Not even a tooth brush and I can’t go near anywhere like home or the shop.”  
“We’ll manage” said Billy. “Do you know what I would like to do?”  
Todd smiled. “I think you are going to tell me!” he said.  
“I know I’ve had a lovely deep sleep and I shouldn’t be tired when I’ve just been asleep, but I’m so looking forward to sleeping together- and I mean sleeping.”  
“Let’s do it” said Todd standing up. “I can’t wait for that either.”  
Todd waited and took Billy’s hand as they walked towards the stairs.

Sean’s life was still in shreds. He just couldn’t focus on anything. He was hoping he was holding it together at work. The final straw would be to lose his job through incompetence. He went to all his usual places and he did his shifts in the pub but he had seen no sign of Billy. He used to come in for a pint to help him unwind after a busy day. By the middle of the week, Sean began to worry about Billy instead of feeling sorry for himself. The last time he saw him was the day of Callum’s funeral and he knew what a state he was in that day. He decided that if he could just see him it would put his mind at rest, so he went over to the church. He must surely have been there since the funeral. Wow he thought. Whatever was Sean Tully doing in a church. It must be love! Sean turned the metal handle of the heavy church door and it creaked open. There was a lady in there cleaning. “Hello” she said as he approached her. “Hello” said Sean. “I’m sorry to bother you.”  
“No problem” said the lady. “You’re the vicar’s friend aren’t you?”  
“Yes” said Sean as the words seemed to sting his ears.” I don’t seem to have seen him for a little while though.”  
“Ah no” said the lady. “He is away at the moment. Taken a few days off. Well -earned mind you!” she added. “He hasn’t taken a day off since his appointment. He works far too hard. Far too conscientious. Always trying to prove himself worthy I think, but there’s really no need. Sorry I can’t give him a message. I’m not sure when he is back to work. I know there’s a stand in for Sunday.”  
“No problem” said Sean. “Sorry to disturb you.”  
“Always glad of a chat” said the lady.” Bye now. Take care.”  
Sean left the church. He saw a bench outside and went and sat on it to think.  
He had built all his hopes on Billy. He somehow thought this was it, the one he would spend the rest of his life with. How wrong can you be. You just never know what’s around the corner. Probably just as well. It really did look as though Billy had moved on and wanted him to do the same. No amount of moping was going to bring him back. If he carried on he might even be the cause of him looking for another parish because he was always in his face. He was going to have to move on. Even though it hurt him so, so much. No one would ever know just how much. Sean got off the bench and began a lonely walk home.

Todd had persuaded Billy to have a long soak in the bath, something he rarely had time for within his usual busy schedule. Todd was sitting on the sofa, quietly playing with his own thoughts. In the time he had been here there had been very few moments that they had been as far apart as the next room. The days had flown by since he and Billy had virtually locked themselves in together totally away from the world. He had sent a few texts to his mum as he had promised and called David regularly to keep up with Sarah’s progress, but otherwise they had talked and got to know each other, watched daytime TV together, become very familiar with each other’s bodies and turn on points. That department in particular had come on in leaps and bounds and both had experienced new things together. There really wasn’t anything else to try or discover. They were totally comfortable with each other. They were so loved up and they were now trying not to be so touchy feely as they knew this would have to stop when they went back in to the world. Other people might at best find it irritating if not embarrassing or repulsive. This was where the idea of the bath had come from. They had showered at least once a day together more for fun than cleanliness. But this was just a little pampering for Billy to have this time to relax. Todd began to run with his thoughts. He thought of Sarah at the church and then if that wasn’t bad enough he revisited the way they found her in Lee’s flat. She had no idea what was going on around her. Maybe that was just as well really. She probably won’t even remember the incident at all with a bit of luck. Then he thought of Billy, how he found him in the vestry huddled in the corner. Thank God he had managed to get him back to the service. Then right on top of that he got that text to tell him that Lee had kidnapped Sarah. He just collapsed on the ground totally, unable to cope. He couldn’t even stand up. He had to support him to walk to the car and into the flat. Then after Sarah had been taken away he again half carried him to the car as tears ran down his cheeks. He just tried to cope with it all. He tried not to share it. not wanting to have to weaken in front of him. It was different now. All week he had held him as he had relapsed into moments of despair and they had got less as the days had passed. He had rocked him and hugged him and whispered in his ear to soothe him. His brave beautiful man allowing him in to see this vulnerable side to him. What a privilege. That was how much he trusted him. The thought of that brought tears to his eyes. The pain he had felt watching him crumbling on those days flashed through his head. He had taken it all in his stride. He had to be strong for Billy. He daren’t stop to analyse it or he would have joined him in a heap on the floor and that wouldn’t do. The tears began to flow as he relived all those painful moments. His poor sweet Billy being treated like that by his own brother. He rubbed his face and eyes trying to stop the tears but it didn’t work. He lifted his feet on to the sofa and wrapped his arms round his knees resting his head on them as the tears flowed. He wasn’t aware of Billy walking in and freezing in his tracks with a gasp. He came over to the sofa and placed his hand gently on Todd’s hair. Todd nearly jumped off the sofa and very heavy breathing followed as Todd hurriedly tried to gain control.  
“I’m sorry” he said breathlessly. “I didn’t hear you coming.”  
Billy tapped Todd’s legs so that he took them down.  
“You weren’t supposed to see this” he said quietly.  
“Then I’m glad I came back when I did!” Billy said. He held his arms out to him. Todd was about to resist but instead the tears fell more rapidly and he fell into Billy’s arms. It was Billy’s turn to rub his back gently and run his fingers through his hair. “I’m sorry” said Todd. “That’s my job. You shouldn’t be doing this” Billy moved back so that he could see Todd. “You are so wrong!” he said. “This is meant to be a partnership. Don’t you ever hide things from me.”  
“I wasn’t hiding anything,” Todd insisted. “I didn’t realise I was feeling that way.” But if you had, you would have tried to hide it. What sort of relationship is that? You tell me.” Todd’s face fell.” If you think this is a weakness that’s ok. I don’t personally. I think it shows you are dealing with your emotions and that is a strength, but if you do think it’s a weakness then you need support. How would I know you need support if you hide it from me? I believe that love is the strongest thing of all and if there’s no love there’s no relationship. Todd do you believe that?” “Yes of course I do. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” “My love I’m not upset with you. Really. But I do want us to have trust. And honesty. If you don’t trust me with the whole you, it’s not going to work.”” I do trust you but I don’t do emotions. Only in my bed room with the door shut. It’s the way it’s always been. I’m not used to having someone that close. I was always on my own standing on my own two feet.” Todd looked into Billy’s eyes. “I understand what you are saying” he said.  
“Don’t be embarrassed with me. Give me the whole you. You’ve already got the whole me,” Billy said. Todd nodded and held out his arms. They hugged caringly. “I won’t hide things from you,” he said.” I promise.

Sean had really really tried to pull himself out of it. He got the idea it was pointless. Billy didn’t want him back even though he had said all the right things. Sean wondered where Billy was and why he had taken time off work for the first time ever. This must be linked to the funeral. It seems it proved more traumatic than he had let on. So where had he gone? And who with. He didn’t know anyone around here. He surely hadn’t gone on his own. Sean went down to the kitchen to make himself a cup of tea just as Eileen Jason and Pat arrived. “Oh Sean” called out Eileen “Is that the kettle I smell? I could murder a brew!” Sean sighed. “Ok” he said “Do the rest of you want one too?” There was a chorus of please so Sean gathered up the mugs. “So where did you say that brother of mine Is? It’s been so peaceful without him here.” Jason said. “Jason!” Eileen glared at Jason. “That’s not a nice way to talk about your brother!” she said. “Well it’s true, though” he said. “So where is he?” “He’s away staying with a friend for a while.” “What friend? “asked Jason. “He doesn’t have any friends.” Sean thought about that and then did a re run of whatever he had already thought about Billy. Surely it’s not possible that they are together is it? He asked about his feelings for Todd and he didn’t answer. “I’m going to have a bath” he heard Jason say. “Ah I was about to have a shower” Pat said.” Only a quickie. Can I go first? Please? I’ll shout to you as soon as I’m out.” “I suppose” said Jason. “I’ll be in my room. Give me a call when it’s free.” “Thanks mate” Pat said and they both went upstairs.” Well” said Sean “I’ve just made their tea!” “Well I’ll have mine” said Eileen and Sean brought it in, putting it on the table and she sat down. Sean joined her. “Eileen, can I ask you something. I know you’ll say I’m being stupid but I just want your opinion.” “What about Sean?” Eileen asked.” I’ve been sort of wondering about something and now Jason has brought it back again. My Billy, no, Billy- he’s not my Billy any more, Billy is away somewhere. Don’t know where don’t know who with. Seemed like he left in a hurry. Todd suddenly took off. No one knows where or who with. It’s none of my business now I know, but, do you think they are together?” “What Todd and Billy? Surely not.” “It just seems a bit of a coincidence. That’s all” Sean said. “He hasn’t said anything which might suggest it?” “No Sean he hasn’t.” “Hmm ok” said Sean. “Thanks. I just wondered.” Sean went off upstairs to his room leaving Eileen staring after him. He had sown a seed.

Todd couldn’t believe it was Sunday already. He and Billy had spent almost a week together 24/7, neither of them having been outside the door. The freezer and the cupboards accepted the challenge and they had muddled through without starving. They had become so close in that time. Todd couldn’t believe it and he also couldn’t imagine having to go back to living apart. Billy had made a good recovery which he said was totally down to Todd’s vigilance which made his chest swell whenever he heard it, although he didn’t let on. He had kept in constant touch with David to keep track on Sarah’s progress and he seemed to think she was doing well. In a way Lee had done her a favour bringing the inevitable to the fore, but it didn’t excuse his actions. They had had no contact with him at all. Todd wasn’t even sure if he knew where Billy lived but he presumed he did. Now that the week was coming to an end they were going to have to talk about Lee and Todd was determined that Lee would take on board that he would not only be dealing with Billy in the future. He was determined that he was not going to bring Billy down to that level again. He was going to make his presence felt. The other big issue was of course Sean. He couldn’t hide away from that any more. He was going to have to face him. There was no way he could give up on what he had with Billy. This was for keeps. He absolutely adored him and this week of confinement had proved to both of them that despite the speed at which the relationship evolved, it was the real deal. He would also have to give serious thought to being a vicar’s wife! It had been referred to jokingly but he really didn't know where he stood on that one. How much would he have to hide away. This was the rest of their lives they were talking about here. Maybe he and Sean had never discussed that far. Todd realised there was either tonight or Monday night to sort out all these issues. On Tuesday he was going to have to face the world. There was no with or without Billy in this. It went without saying that he had no option but to meet this lot face on. He couldn’t possibly consider life without Billy.

Billy felt like he was living on a cloud. He had regained his strength along with his peace of mind. Every time he had had a Lee meltdown Todd had been there hugging him and whispering in his ear. He really believed in Todd. He knew that he felt the same way as he did. They were so in love. But their bubble of protection was about to burst and they were going to have to face the world. Ideally this would be together. There was no other way. But there were a few things needing sorting out before that could happen. He was currently sitting in his study staring at a few lines of notes. He was meant to be working on a sermon. He wouldn’t need it until next Sunday but he felt he should have a go and see if his concentration was back. Todd was cooking the evening meal. A bit like the last supper he said. Todd was no expert in the kitchen but he had improved in the past week as they tried to scrape meals out of nothing. This meal had been saved for today because their week in hiding ended here. He was going over how he could broach the subject with Todd that there were big issues which needed addressing. Before tomorrow.

Todd was happy that the meat was cooked and there was no point cooking the spaghetti yet, so he was about to go and sit down, when Billy walked in. “Finished already?” Todd asked. “No. I did get a bit further though” Billy said.” I can’t really concentrate. No, not because of all that. I’m ok with it all. It’s US which is distracting me, because we aren’t ready to go back into the world tomorrow.” “No we aren’t” said Todd. “There are a few things we really need to talk about.” “You were thinking that too?” Billy asked.” I’ve been thinking it since yesterday” said Todd. Billy sat down on the sofa and Todd turned off the cooker and went to join him. Billy put his arm round Todd’s shoulder and Todd shuffled down to lay his head on Billy’s chest, his arm draped across his stomach. “Do you want to go first?” asked Billy. “Ok” said Todd. “I’m concerned about you and Lee. I told him you had no money so don’t come asking and ....and I said he will not break you again or I would be calling the police. I don’t know if he would have taken any notice of it, but I want to know what will happen if he comes after you again. I want a strategy in place so we know what you will do. I want to be involved in it every time, but if he turns up at the church I’m not going to be there and he knows that.” Billy rubbed his hand over his face. “That was one of the things I wanted to talk to you about,” Billy said. “But I don’t have a solution. Do you?” “No, said Todd quietly.” I have tried to come up with a plan but I haven’t managed it yet.” “I don’t want to deal with him” Billy said,” but you are right. Last time he came to the church, just before the funeral.” “You didn’t say,” Todd looked up at Billy. “No I know.” was the reply.” If you had a plan, I would attempt to say to him here’s Todd’s phone number. call him, but you don’t”.” He needs rehab or something but unless he wants to go it’s a waste of time,” said Todd. “We tried that. It didn’t work.” “How would being cruel to be kind work? Just send him away. If he is on detox he will feel so bad he will plead to go to rehab,” said Todd. “Definitely no funding though,” Billy insisted.” “He blackmails me with his words telling me I don’t care and I let him down.” “You just need to try to think that he’s just playing you and it isn’t true, but that’s easy for me to say” said Todd.” I’m not on the edge of an emotional precipice. Maybe we need to try the cold shoulder treatment. It can’t do much worse” suggested Todd. “If you think it’s our best option. I can’t, see the wood for the trees as far as he is concerned, as you know.” “Ok then let’s try that.” Todd said “and if I see him around looking like he is up to no good I will remind him he needs to keep away.” “Ok” said Billy.” No idea if it will work but it’s a start. We will do that.” “Ok” said Todd. “So what’s your next topic?” “Sean” said Billy. “That was mine too” said Todd. “How do we tackle this one?” “It’s actually my responsibility not yours” said Billy.” I’m the one who has to explain to him. I’m the one who was in a relationship with him.” “So why do I feel so guilty?” asked Todd.” I live in the same house as him and I have taken away the only person he cares about.” “Oh Todd don’t say that” said Billy.” Why? Does it make you want to go back to him?” Todd asked.” Is that a serious question?” Billy asked.” I hope not” said Todd. “I just feel so uncomfortable and guilty.” “You have nothing to feel guilty about. You’ve done nothing wrong” said Billy.” He asked me a while ago to answer him yes or no to the question was there something between you and me. I couldn’t answer him so he said I didn’t even need one word. My face said it all. All I need to do is go back to that and tell him he was right but I couldn’t tell him then because I hadn’t told you.” “And he will take that?” “Yes he will. He will know it’s the truth.” Todd said” He will be devastated. How can I live in the same house as him after that?” “You can’t” said Billy.” That’s why you need to move in with me.” Todd sat up.” Are you serious? I could really move in?” “It wasn’t in your plan was it” said Billy softly.” Living with you was at the top of my list” said Todd” but I didn’t know if I was allowed to be here anyway if the church owns it.” “They can’t tell me who I live with Todd” he said” or who I fall in love with.”  
“Are you sure about this?” “Of course I’m sure” said Billy.” I’ve never been more certain- unless you aren’t sure.” ”I couldn’t be more sure” Todd said and reached up for a kiss.” And that brings me to my next topic.” “There’s another? Asked Billy.” I only had the two. What is it?” “The vicar’s wife said Todd grinning at Billy and even more so when he saw his puzzled look. “If you are as long term in this as you say you are and you are already suggesting I move in with you, are you expecting me to pretend I don’t know you for the rest of our lives because that won’t work.” “No .I have thought about this and I know what you are saying. I was new to the parish when I met Sean. I’m known here now. I’ve made my mark. People know I’m gay so they won’t be expecting a vicar’s wife. These days the vicar’s wife isn’t expected to attend Mothers Union and Young Wives. It’s going to be hard if you never darken the doors of the church and no, I’m not saying you should. Don’t worry. It’s me you are sworn to, not the church.” “Am I going to make things difficult for you then because I’m not a Christian?” “I can’t ask you to take on my religion Todd. Enough is enough,” Billy said.” But we have fund raising events and concerts and things. Maybe you could come to them with me?”  
“I’m sure I can do that. I don’t mind singing carols. I could manage that.” said Todd. And the children’s Christmas party?” “I can do anything which doesn’t involve an actual religious act and I won’t do anything which makes you feel awkward. If there’s a gala ball and I want to dance a slow dance with you I won’t insist. I would assume you would be too embarrassed” Todd said. Billy laughed. “I wouldn’t be anywhere else. I would want us to do it. I’m so not ashamed that I Iove a man. I do think you have a way to go there though. I am always respectful of that. I reckon you would have all the kids falling over backwards for you” said Billy” and the ladies group will be so jealous of me”! He kissed the top of Todd’s head. “Get on” said Todd blushing.” You think I’m joking? I can already hear them saying oh my God what a waste!!” Todd laughed and reached both hands up to Billy’s neck drawing him down to a kiss. “So would you introduce me to them?” Todd asked? “I certainly would if you were there with me, but it will be a bit limiting as you won’t be at the services.” “I would have to come to at least one,” Todd said.” Would you really?” asked Billy. Yes, I would. Can’t say if I would go back again though. How would you introduce me?” Todd asked.“How would you want me to introduce you?” Billy asked. Todd lay his head down on Billy’s lap so he could see his face.” Your husband?” he said. “You may be joking, but nothing would make me prouder!” said Billy. “Who said I was joking? asked Todd.” How about Church House echoing with the patter of tiny feet while you’re at it?” “You are laughing at me” said Billy feeling genuinely hurt. Todd sat up looked straight into Billy’s eyes. “Where’s the laugh?” he asked. Billy studied him. “God you’re serious!” he said. Todd nodded.” We’ve got an even busier day tomorrow than I thought if we need to get all that lot done!” Billy said his eyes shining.” Seriously though, if you say you want all this, how far from now should this happen? If you’re think of marriage, when are we going to get engaged?” “Well tell you what, you tell Sean in the morning while I go and tell my mum and then we will go into town and buy two engagement rings. Is that too fast for you?” Billy shook his head. “I just can’t believe all this is really happening to me. I feel someone’s going to be shaking me in a minute telling me to wake up. Is this actually going to happen? Tomorrow?” “This time tomorrow I will be engaged” said Todd.” How about we have some drinking chocolate and we have an early night? It’s going to be a big day tomorrow.” “I’m all for that!” replied Billy.” I’ll put the milk on.”  
“Billy,” said Todd and Billy stopped and turned.” We will be back here tomorrow night won’t we? Officially I mean. No more hiding.” As soon as Sean knows it’s in the open- and your mum of course.” Billy went off to put milk in a pan and Todd stood behind him at the cooker, arms round his middle, head resting on his back lovingly.” I love you Billy Mayhew” he said. “I love my fiance more!” replied Billy, turning to bring Todd into a hug, placing feather light kisses behind his ear. “Get off!” laughed Todd. “The milk’s going to boil over!”

Billy woke first next day and had showered before Todd woke. He was just stirring as be finished dressing. Todd focused on Billy and rubbed his eyes. “Have I overslept? Why didn’t you wake me?” asked Todd. “No it’s not late. It’s still early. Go back to sleep.” “Why are you dressed?” Todd asked. “I was awake so I thought I might as well. Hey we can go shopping today. Food at last!” “Yey! Thank God for that!” said Todd. “Stay there and I’ll bring you a brew.” Billy said. Todd cuddled back in to the duvet and had drifted off again when he felt the dip in the mattress telling him Billy and the tea had arrived. “Why are you so efficient in the damn morning?” Todd asked. “It’s what I’m used to.” Billy laughed. “Go back to sleep if you want.” Todd pulled himself up.” No” he said “I’ll have my tea please!” Billy passed the tea and sat on top of the duvet to drink his. “When are you going to see Sean?” Todd asked. “I would quite like to see my mum at the same time. I don’t want him telling her.” “When do Jason and Pat go to work?” Billy asked, “because that will leave your mum in on her own. I can text Sean and ask him to meet me.” “They leave at 8.30 usually” said Todd. “Shaun leaves just after to start at the factory. Text him at 8.30 and ask him to meet you. Then he will have to go to work and I can call in and see mum at 9 and then nip in and tell Tracy I’ll be back to work tomorrow.” “Ok. That’s as good a plan as any” Billy said. Todd put his hand on Billy’s arm.” Are you dreading it?” he asked. “I would be.” “My stomach is churning already!” he replied. “That’s why I’m up so early.” He leaned over to kiss Todd,” but you’re worth it!” he said and got off the bed to head downstairs. “I’ll see what I can scrape together for breakfast” he called. Todd finished his tea and headed to the shower. At least he had drawn the long straw this time he thought!

Eileen enjoyed this time of day. Jason and Pat had gone to work and Sean had just hustled out the door with a definite purpose in his life for a change, forgetting to shout goodbye and she was sitting at the table eating the last piece of toast and drinking her newly poured tea, before heading up for a shower. She heard the front door open and sighed. “Ok” she said. “Who’s forgotten something?” She didn’t turn round immediately until she heard the voice. “Hello mum.” “Todd!” she called. “You’re back! Would you like a brew?” “I’d love one” said Todd, thinking that he had only just finished one. He went and sat at the table while his mum boiled the kettle. She came and joined him placing the tea in front of him and continuing to drink her own. “Have you had a good time wherever you’ve been?” she asked. “Yes thanks” said Todd. “Mum, I want to talk to you about something.” he said, studying the tea in his mug. “This sounds serious.” said Eileen. Todd nodded. “Is something wrong?” his mum asked. “Are you in some kind of trouble?” Todd smiled and looked up at her concerned face. “No, nothing like that” he said.” I don’t really know where to start.” “At the beginning?” suggested Eileen. “I don’t know where that is!” said Todd.” I’m going to be moving out mum” he said. “Ah, a spare room at last!” said Eileen and laughed at the hurt face which focused on her. “I’m joking” she said. “So you’re moving out. Are you moving away from the area?” “No,” said Todd. “I’ll still be working in the florists, more’s the pity!” “Oh right” said Eileen. “I’m moving in with someone.” Todd continued. “As in you’ve found a partner?” she asked. “Yes” said Todd softly. “You do mean an actual partner?” Eileen checked. Todd nodded. “Is this what you want?” she asked. You’re not being forced into something.” “No. I’m in love mum. I’ve never felt like this before. Ever.” “Oh wow!” said Eileen. “I never thought I would hear you say that!” “Well that gives you a fair idea then.” he said. “You know how big this is. I’ve just lost it. It’s all I can think of.” Tears began to form in Todd’s eyes. “Todd are you ok?” Eileen asked. All she got was a nod as Todd coveredhis face with his hands. Eileen changed chairs to sit beside Todd. She put her hand on his arm. Todd took his hands down, tears rolling down his cheeks and he hugged his mum. “Come on love” Eileen says. “I don’t get why you are upset.” “I’m not” Todd mutters. “I’m just not used to talking about emotions. You wouldn’t believe how I feel. I really never thought this would happen to me. I’m just totally blown away by it.” He broke the hug and smiled at his mum even though there were still tears. “You said you are going to be living locally.” Eileen commented and Todd nodded. “So this person is local.” Another nod as Todd builds up towards the hard bit. “I’m assuming this is a male we are talking about.” Todd raised his eyebrows. “Just checking” she said. For some reason a conversation she had had with Sean came into her mind and she gasps. Todd’s face changed as he watched her. “What mum?” he asked. “I know who it is don’t I” she stated. “Do you?” Todd asked. “You’ve just been away and it all happened suddenly. Someone else did exactly the same thing.” “I haven’t actually been anywhere. I never left Weatherfield” he admitted. “You both stayed here?” Todd nodded. “Does Sean know about this?” she asked. “He does by now” Todd said. “He asked me yesterday if I thought you were with him.” “I’m sorry about that” he said with genuine care. “I didn’t plan this and I never intended to hurt him.” “Well,” said Eileen. “If this is for real, you probably had no say over it. You don’t exactly pick who you fall in love with. He does feel the same about you?” “Most definitely.” Todd replied. “And I will take as much of my stuff as I can later today so I won’t be living in the same house as him.” “Well I can’t say I’m sorry about that! I’m going to be the one picking up the pieces! Eileen said. “Sorry” said Todd.” Don’t be” said Eileen. “If you are both sure, then that’s all there is to it. You can’t worry about other people.” Todd’s phone beeped and he checked the message. “I have to go” he said. “Will you be in this afternoon?” “You can just let yourself in if I’m not if you want your stuff.” she replied. “It’s not just that” said Todd. “I want to prove to you that I am telling you the truth.” “Son, I’m not doubting you.” “No, I know, but I’m still going to prove it to you. Will you be here at about 2?” “ Yes I would think so” Eileen said. “No big plans for today. I’ll see you later then.” Todd stood, kissed his mum on the cheek and was gone. Eileen sat down, trying to take it all in.

Billy decided that as it was a sunny day, he could meet Sean on a bench, so he text him and asked him to meet him, describing the whereabouts of the bench he would be waiting at. He was there before Sean arrived as he had hoped. When he came he was his usual bubbling self. “I’ve missed you” he said. “I wondered if you were ok. You weren’t good after the funeral and I haven’t seen you since.” “No” Billy said.” I’ve not been around.” “No, it’s something for you to take time off work.” Billy wondered how he knew about that but he didn’t ask. “Sean, there’s something I have to tell you” Billy began. “Oh yes? What’s that then?” asked Sean. “There’s no easy way of saying this.” said Billy. “So why don’t you just get on with it?” said Sean. “In fact, I’ll make it easier for you. Have you come to say we are back together again or have you come to tell me you are with Todd?” Billy’s mouth fell open. “When I asked you if there was anything between you and him, you couldn’t answer” he said. “No, I couldn’t” Billy put in, “because he didn’t know at that point.” “You what?” Sean wasn’t expecting that. “So he didn’t drag you away from me then!” “No. It was the other way round.” Billy said softly. “I’m so sorry Sean. I really am. As you said, we had some really good times, but this just knocked me for 6. I swear it wasn’t planned and I didn’t do it on purpose to hurt you.” For the first time Sean lost his constantly smiling look and looked away from Billy.” I’m not going to pretend about this.” he began. “I am devastated. You know that anyway, so I will not belittle something so dear to my heart .I will always love you but I won’t make a scene, as I am bound to bump into the pair of you. Don’t feel you have to boycott the Rovers or anything like that. God I live in the same house as him!” “He is moving out today” Billy said quietly. “Ah. Good.” said Sean. “I would hate for Eileen to ask me to leave as I don’t have anywhere else to go. My home has been there for years.” “I know” said Billy again speaking quietly. “Well, if that’s all you want, I will make my way to work.” “I’m sorry again, Sean.” Billy said. “Yes, I know. So am I. Good bye Billy.” and Sean left Billy sitting on the bench with his head in his hands. He took a few moments to try to compose himself and then sent a text to Todd. He told him where he was and said he would wait for him. By the time Todd arrived, Billy felt more composed, but Todd took one look at him and pulled him into a hug which started the tears again. That has to be the worst thing I have ever had to do.” Billy muttered into Todd’s shoulder. “I’m sorry” said Todd, rubbing Billy’s back gently. “But it’s done now” said Billy. He broke the hug, wiping his eyes.” Right then! Are we going in to town?” “You want to go straight away?” Billy looked deeply into Todd’s eyes. “Yes. I need to go now.” “Or you will change your mind?” Todd asked. “God no! “said Billy horrified. “But I want to get that nasty taste out of my mouth and put it behind me.” Billy stood up and held out his hand and for the first time, Todd and Billy walked down the street as a couple hand in hand.


	3. Love flourishes

Love flourishes.

Eileen was into her afternoon TV when Todd came in followed by Billy.” Mum?” he said, causing her to jump. “Oh you fool. I didn’t hear you come in. Hello Billy.” “Hi Eileen” Billy said.” Sorry” said Todd. “You’re going to take your stuff?” “Yes if you’ve got black bags. I’m sorry. I should have brought some.” “Not a problem. Just help yourself” she said. “Thanks, but before we do that, there’s something we want to show you.” “Oh?” Eileen looked at them expectantly. Todd reached out his hand for Billy as they both came closer to Eileen and then both held out their left hands on which were matching black onyx silver rings. Eileen gasped. “You’re engaged?” she asked. “We are” Todd said. “Oh Todd!” Eileen stood up. “I wasn’t expecting that!” She kissed Todd’s cheek as she gave him a hug and then did the same to Billy. “So you intend to actually get married?” she asked. “We do.” Todd replied. “Not just yet but probably not too far away. And again not yet but in the near future, we intend to have a family.” “I don’t know what to say!” said Eileen. “That’s a first!” said Todd cheekily. She clouted his arm playfully. “Oh I’m so excited for you! It’s just so sudden though. You are absolutely sure about all this.” Todd held his mum’s arms.” Mum, what did I tell you this morning. I have never felt anything like this before. My God, it’s enough to make you curl over with the pain. That’s how much it hurts.” He reached out for Billy s hand. “I love him with all my heart mum” he said “And I feel exactly the same way” added Billy. Eileen looked between the two of them. “I can see it.” she said. “I really can see it! I have never seen Todd look so happy and contented.” “I bet you never expected your son to be a vicar’s wife!” said Billy.  
“Oh my! Are you going to start going to church?” Eileen smiled at the thought. “I will go at least once and see how I get on, but there will be functions I will go to as Billy’s husband when that time arrives.” Eileen clapped her hands. “I’m just so excited!” she said. “A proper wedding this time!” “Well I think we should get these black bags and see how much stuff I can take. I don’t want to bump straight in to Sean.” “Right” said Billy. “Let’s get started.”

Todd was shattered from fetching and carrying black bags containing all his worldly goods. It was 8 in the evening and Church House was looking reasonably shipshape once again. Most of his stuff had been packed away or displayed depending on what it was. The fridge freezer and food cupboards were chock a block and there was wine cooling in the fridge. The previous occupant had left to go into a clergy home and didn’t need any furniture or even cups and saucers so he left it all behind. As he had only lodged before he was offered this appointment, Billy was glad of it, but he wondered how old the original owner might be by now, as it must have definitely seen a fair few incumbents before him. Just the few extra items made the place look different already, more homely. Todd suggested that maybe some of the design skills he was supposed to learn at the florists had made an impression. They had had a Chinese take away for dinner accompanied by a glass of wine but they would return to the bottle later. The next day was going to be the first day back to work and everything would be business as usual. After an evening with a DVD and the rest of the wine with nibbles, the boys settled for an early night. They had a bit of fun, and fell asleep in each other’s arms as they usually did, wondering how the next day would pan out.  
Billy had a meeting with the parents who wanted the christening that Todd cancelled the previous week and he had to meet with the church warden to look at some structural wear and tear which needed urgent repair. The mother’s and toddlers group met in the morning and he hadn’t been in there for a while, so he should be able to fit that in and there was always the sermon notes he had started on. He wondered if anyone would notice his ring. He really hoped someone would, as he had no family members who would be sharing his good news and he so wanted people to know.

Todd had to be at the florist’s early, ready to open up the shop. He guessed Tracy would spot the new jewellery and want to know all about it. They didn’t have regular customers who might ask him about it. So it was all official and out in the open but he still didn’t have anyone to share it with, apart from Tracy and even that depended on what mood she was in. There was no family as such. Only his mum and brother. He was so pleased about the genuine look of excitement on his mum’s face when she saw the rings. It really made his heart beat faster. He probably couldn’t have drinks in the pub with his mum because Sean would be there working and he really had no wish to rub salt into the wounds. He did think maybe the Bistro was an idea, but there was no way Pat Phelan would be invited and he doubted Jason would be interested. A grand party for three. Ah well! He had been in the shop ten minutes before Tracy appeared.” Oh thank God you’re back!” she said on seeing Todd. “Glad you missed me!” he replied. “I’ve missed you on the morning tea run” she said. “I’ve had to make it myself!” Todd laughed and headed for the back room, returning a few minutes later with two mugs. “I see you’ve eaten all the biscuits!” he said, putting two mugs on the counter. “One packet doesn’t last that long!” Tracy defended herself. “Well there’s a little shop just up the road” Todd continued. “If you go in there they will give you some more!” Well that’s why I keep a runner!” said Tracy, “only the runner ran out on me!” “Sorry about that.” said Todd. “Is your friend ok now?” she asked. “Yes thank you” he replied. “So do you want me to top up the biscuit stocks? We are nearly out of tea bags too.” “Yeah, go on” said Tracy.” Do you want to take the cash with you?” Todd opened the till and counted out a few coins.” How much have you got?” she inquired and he opened his hand to reveal the coins. “Ok” she said. Todd closed his hand and walked round the counter. “Stop!” Tracy shouted. “Do that again!” “Why?” asked Todd. “You saw the coins.” “Hold out your hand!” she said, which Todd did. “All this fuss over a few coins?” he thought. “What’s that?” she said.” Hand!!” “Ah.” Todd grinned and opened his hand. “Turn it over. “Said Tracy. Todd put the coins in the other hand and turned it over. Tracy grabbed his hand. “Ooh I like that” she said. “What’s the stone?” “Black onyx” Todd informed her. “Very nice” she said taking Todd’s hand to have a closer look. “Next question.” she continued. “Is it linked to a significant other?” “Yes” said Todd and took his hand away as Tracy let go. “So you are engaged?” I am” Todd said, trying not to beam at her. “No wonder you’re trying to control that grin!” she said. “Congratulations.” Todd really did beam then. “Thank you” he said. “And do we know the lucky man?” she asked. Todd looked down for a second but then noted what he was doing. He didn’t want anyone to think he was ashamed of his fiance.” It’s Billy.” Tracy gasped. “As in Sean and.........?, “ “Well yes, but not anymore.” “Oh God Todd and I thought I lived dangerously!” Todd grinned. “I’ll get the biscuits” he said and headed out the door with Tracy beaming after him. “That’s my boy!” she said.

Billy arrived at the Mothers and Toddlers group just as the tea was made. “Ah here comes the vicar!” said an older lady, one of the organisers. “He’s smelt the tea again!” “Hello. Joyce” said Billy.” How’s it going? Lots here today.” “Yes it’s going really well,” Joyce replied.” It’s so nice that they turn up regularly too.” “Hello Iris,” Billy greeted the other organiser. “How are you?” “I’m fine vicar. thank you” she said,” and you?” “Yes, I’m good thank you Iris,” Billy replied. “Really good.” Billy had a habit of playing with his fingers when speaking to someone and now he had found something new to play with. He twiddled the ring. “Do you want to go and chat?” Joyce asked “I’ll make your tea.” “Thank you.” Billy went over to join where the younger ladies were sitting around a large mat made of alphabet jigsaw pieces on which about 8 toddlers were playing. “Good morning ladies” he said. “Good morning” the chorus replied and then Billy spotted the only gentleman sitting with a blond curly haired girl. He was rolling a soft ball to her and she was attempting to roll it back. As Billy got there, the ball shot off past him so he fetched it and gave it to the young man.” Thanks” he said taking the ball. “I’ve not seen you here before” said Billy.” No” said the young man.” I’ve recently moved here.” “With your daughter.” Billy stated. “Yes” said the young man.” So are you a stay at home dad?” he asked.” Er yes” was the reply. “Very modern!” smiled Billy and the young man smiled back. “I saw the notice on the gate when I walked by” he said “so I thought I would give it a try.” He started talking quietly.” I didn’t know if they would let me join” he said, “but they ‘ve been very nice.” “That’s good” said Billy. “I’m glad to hear it.” “ It will be a way of Emily making friends when she’s a bit older” he continued. “I don’t know anyone here at the moment.” “I’m Billy by the way” said the vicar, offering his hand.” Scott,” came the reply with a firm hand shake. Joyce arrived at this moment with Billy’s tea. “Cheers Joyce” said Billy, taking the cup and saucer. “So you just have the one?” Billy continued as Joyce went off to chat to some others. “Oh yes” said Scott” You don’t make the same mistake twice.” Then with an intake of breath, he added. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say that.” Billy smiled. “That’s ok” he said. “Not all babies can be planned.” “Don’t get me wrong. I adore Emily” Scott said quickly.” I can see that” said Billy. “It’s just ... It’s hard wondering if you will be accepted.” “Emily’s mum?” Scott shook his head. “Just Emm and me” he said.” I see” said Billy. Hence the mistake.” “Not exactly” Scott said. “I’m so sorry” said Billy. “Please tell me to shut up. I’m being nosey.” “It’s ok” said Scott. “If I tell you, it will save me telling everyone else. I would rather tell you because you’re a vicar. Maybe you won’t judge me.” “I’m certainly not in the habit of judging people.” Billy said. “I got married” he said “and then we found that the baby was on the way. The trouble is, we really shouldn’t have got married.” “I see” said Billy, not asking why. but hoping he would find out. “There was something I didn’t tell her.” “Ok” said Billy. “Because I wasn’t sure.” Billy felt be might be one step ahead. “Do you want to share this?” he asked. “You don’t have to you know.” Scott passed Emily a different toy as she was bored with the current ones. “I met someone else, just after we got married.” “Ok” said Billy. “My wife caught us kissing.” “That’s not good” said Billy. “It wasn’t” Scott continued. “She threw me out there and then. There wasn’t really anything going on. It never happened again. But she decided I was a cheat and I should have Emily.” But you weren’t cheating?” “Well yes I was.” “But it only happened once?” Billy thought he was on the wrong track.” It did, but that wasn’t why she said I was a cheat. She believed I was hiding something. I honestly didn’t know I was.” The boy’s eyes glazed over. “This is difficult for you.” Billy stopped him. “Either we stop there, or maybe you would like to come for a walk in the garden outside. Does Emily have a pushchair?” “Yes” said Scott looking towards it. “Yes please. I will do that. Thank you.” “You sort her out and I’ll just have a quick chat with the others.” Billy said hello to the young mums and then took his cup back to Joyce. She and Iris were smiling at Billy. “Er, we were wondering if we had noticed something different” Iris began. “Where?” asked Billy, fearing they were talking about the young man, but they were both making meanings towards his hand. Billy beamed at them. “I got engaged yesterday!” he said quietly. “Oh lovely!” Both ladies beamed back at him and Iris was clapping her hands. “Congratulations!” they both said together also quietly. “Are we going to meet him?” Iris asked boldly. Billy blushed. “He isn’t really a church goer, but he said he will come with me to at least one service. “This week?” asked Joyce. “Possibly” said Billy. “Tell him we will buy some special biscuits” said Iris. ”In his honour! ”Billy laughed. “I will do that ladies” he said. “I’m just going to take a walk outside with the young man. You needn’t lock up. I’m meeting Ken in an hour about the damp patch in the corner by the font.” “Ok” said both the ladies. “See you on Sunday” he said, “For the special biscuits!” said iris and all three laughed. As Billy got towards the door he said Bye bye ladies. Good to see you again” and he gave a mini wave as did the ladies calling goodbye. Scott met him at the door and he led the way checking he was ok with the pushchair. “There’s a seat just round here said Billy and they walked around the corner and sat down. “Thank you” said Scott “I was about to show myself up in there. It’s all a bit raw still.” “It wasn’t appropriate” Billy said. “We couldn’t let that happen to you. If you wish to continue, please do. Sometimes it helps to talk, but you don’t have to say any more.” “It’s easy to talk to you” Scott said. I don’t know why. I usually try to avoid it.” Billy smiled at him and patted his hand. “I’m here to listen” he said. Scott noticed the ring. “You’re married then” he said “I’m engaged” he said. “Yesterday.” “Congratulations!” Scott said. “Thank you” said Billy. Billy twiddled the ring with a slightly distant look in his eyes.” She’s very lucky to have someone as understanding as you” said Scott. Billy smiled again. “He”. he said.” Not she.” Scott was shocked at this point. You’re ....Scott began. “Gay” said Billy. “Yes I am. And I think you are too.” Scott closed his eyes. When be opened them there were tears falling gently. “No one really knows” said Scott “and I’m so scared.” “Do you have any family?” asked Billy. “My mum and dad split up when I was 12” he said. “I don’t really bother to keep in contact with him. I’m in contact with my mum and my sister though” he said. “But they don’t know?” asked Billy. “No. No I can’t tell them. I can’t tell anyone.” “Scott” Billy said” You are hurting yourself by not telling anyone and there’s no need for it.” “That’s easy for you to say” said Scott. “I didn’t say anything was easy.” he said. “I have been where you are now. I know how it feels.” There were footsteps on the gravel path. Billy and Scott held their breath to find out who it was. Todd appeared around the corner carrying sandwiches from Roy’s cafe. “Todd! Billy beamed. He leapt up and grabbed Todd s hand.” Come and meet Scott.” “Hi Scott” said Todd. “This is my fiancé, Scott” said Billy. Scott reached out his hand to Todd which Todd took. “Sandwiches” Billy said beaming again at Todd. “Yes. I thought we could have lunch together, but if you’re busy…” “Could we possibly share them out?” asked Billy. “No” said Scott.” I must be going” and he went to stand up but he felt Billy’s hand on his shoulder. “No don’t rush off,” he said. “I have an idea. Could I just fill Todd in a bit on the situation?” Scott nodded, embarrassed. “Scott is new to the area. He has a little girl Emily. Single parent. He got thrown out because he found out he’s gay.” Todd frowned. “That sucks” said Todd. Scott looked up hopefully at Todd. He obviously wasn’t going to judge him. “He’s not dealing with it. And he’s scared. He’s all on his own, apart from Emily.” “Mate, that’s awful for you.” said Todd. “Scott, I’ve got this idea. You don’t have to say yes now and you don’t have to say yes at all. It’s just a thought. I know someone who is going through a really rough patch at this moment. Actually he is my ex and he’s suffering. Billy tapped his ring and Scott nodded in understanding. “I am not match making here and you might find him too irritating I was wondering if you would like to meet him, just for company maybe but he’s obviously been through what you’re going through and you might just be able to help each other. You would give him a purpose and he could maybe reassure you on what you are going through. What do you think? Is it worth a try?” “Anything is worth a try” said Scott. Billy looked at Todd. “Do you think it could work?” “It sounds good to me. Could kill two birds with one stone as it were.” said Todd. “If he has his break he may be able to come here- if Scott is willing.” Scott nodded. “You can take the car if you like and see if he will speak to you.” Todd sighed. “I certainly do need to speak to him” he said.” I have a meeting in -15 minutes or I would go.” said Billy throwing Todd his keys. “Don’t forget to bring them back or I won’t be able to lock the church!” he said. “I have to come back anyway to tell Scott.” Todd said. “Good job you’re thinking!” said Billy with a cheesy grin. Todd left.” I haven’t got long anyway” said Scott. “When Emily wakes up she will need her lunch and she’s been in the pushchair a long time.” “She’s such a good girl” said Billy. Scott smiled. “Would you ever want children?” he asked Billy. “We plan to,” said Billy. “You are so comfortable with it” Scott noted. Billy smiled. “I’ve had a few years to get used to it!” he said. Billy’s phone tinkled. “Excuse me” he said and removed his mobile from his pocket. “Todd is bringing him back with him” he said. “Thank you” said Scott. “You have been so kind.” “ I’ve been where you are my friend. That’s why. He won’t take long to drive up here.” Billy’s car came to a halt on the church drive. Todd got out and then Sean. They walked towards Billy and Scott. Billy stood up. “Sean, thanks for coming” he said. “ This is Scott.” Sean nodded to Scott. “I have a meeting in the church” he said. “I have to get back to work” said Todd. “If you don’t mind I’ll just take my sandwich with me. I’m starving. Shall I leave the car?” “How can you get back?” “ No probs. I can walk.” he said. “He followed Billy around the corner towards the front door of the church. “What did you say to him?” he asked.” I text him and asked if he could meet me outside if he was due a break and I said it was important.” “ How did he react?” “Frosty” said Todd.” Well how would you react?” Billy nodded. “I said there was a young man up at the church who has just found out he is gay and he is scared. I said you were wondering if he could talk to him. I said I had the car. He nodded and walked to the car. We didn’t speak on the way here though.” “I’m sorry about the lunch. It was a lovely idea. So thoughtful. So you.” Billy put his hand on Todd’s cheek and they kissed intimately. “I’ll try again tomorrow,” Todd said. “See you at home. Love you.” Billy smiled. “Love my fiance more !” he said and he watched Todd walk away before heading in to the church.  
Sean sat on the bench beside Scott. He saw the little girl in the pram and he noted how young he was, hardly more than a boy it seemed. Sean looked Scott in the eyes.” Are you ok? he asked. as he watched tears begin to form in the young man’s eyes. “I expect you have already told them and you are sick of it” he said, “but if there’s anything I can do to help I will be more than willing to do anything I can.” “People here are so kind” he said “I can’t believe it.” He wiped his tears with his sleeve. “I’m sorry. I don’t usually do this.” Sean spoke softly. “This is a difficult subject for you to deal with” he said, putting his hand on Scott’s arm. “If you want to let it go, do. I won’t think any different of you for it. I’ve already been here.” he said. “I just didn’t know where to turn until I came here today and started talking to the vicar” he said.” There’s only me and Emily. I don’t have anyone to talk to.” Sean still had his hand on his arm. “Well if ever you want to talk I will be there for you. Just text me and I’ll be there. If I can’t come in person we can talk through texts. I’ll give you my number. Have you got a mobile to write it in?” Scott took his phone out of his pocket and opened to new names. My name is Sean. S e a n he spelt. Sean gave Scott the number. Do you want me to have yours or leave it like that?” Scott gave him his number.” I hate to leave you like this but I have to get back to work” Sean said.” I’m sorry I don’t seem to have been any help.” Scott put his hand on Sean’s shoulder. “You have been brilliant!” he said. “I have taken so much strength from talking to you. When is the best time to text you?” “My phone is always with me so usually I should manage to answer you” he replied. “Could I text you tonight? I have so many questions I want to ask you.” “Tonight would be fine” Sean said. Sean rubbed Scott’s arm. “You take care now” he said and I will hear from you later.” Scott put his hand on Sean’s. “Thanks again” he said and Sean was gone, with a sparkle in his eye and a spring in his step. Scott stood up, checked he had everything and set off pushing the pram, feeling very different from the way he had felt on arrival. He was so glad he had come to the group.

Todd got back to the shop as his phone went off, so he checked the text. It was from his mum asking if he and Billy would like to join her for dinner in the Bistro to celebrate their engagement. She said she didn’t think Pat would be appreciated so she managed to side track him and she doubted that Jason would want to attend a family do, so it would be just the three of them. If they would like to come at 7.30 that would be good for her. Todd text Billy who confirmed the invitation so he re messaged his mum to accept. There was pandemonium in Church House that evening with the two of them wondering what to wear. Todd wished he had thought to pick up two button holes and a small posy for his mum but he hadn’t thought of it. They enjoyed a lovely meal with a bottle of wine on the house when they realised that they were celebrating. Eileen had brought them a card and a cut glass vase which they both really appreciated. Billy had commented that at least the wedding wouldn’t be expensive with only the three of them there and Eileen could be best man and bridesmaid all in one. Both Todd and Billy were loners really with no long string of friends and no family either. The three of them could almost go in to the registry office on Saturday morning and that would be that. From there they all seemed to be really considering it. As two witnesses were needed Jason could probably be persuaded, it being a wedding. Eileen noted how this simple observation seemed to be turning in to a possibility, so she should not be surprised if she heard more about it very soon. Her boys walked her home and as she unlocked the door to go indoors, she turned to see them walking home, Billy’s arm round Todd’s waist and Todd’s arm round Billy’s shoulders. She smiled to herself feeling a warm glow inside at the amazing love she felt pouring off them whenever she was in their presence.

Billy made the hot chocolate as Todd searched for a notebook and pen. They then made their way straight up to bed having placed the card and the vase in the sitting room. Once in bed they sat with the steaming mugs and Secretary Todd had the notebook and pen. They were taking that chat in the Bistro to a much higher level. They were actually planning their wedding. The service would be in the registry office. Billy always knew he would never be allowed to marry in the church. Todd would ask Tracy to make four button holes. They would buy a pack of wedding invites, nothing special. They couldn’t think of anyone else they would want to invite. They could have a meal in the Bistro. It would be nice to have a cake. No doubt the Bistro could sort that for them. They would have to buy a suit each. Could they actually do this? Soon?

Todd had spent the night at his mums. It seemed very strange as it was the first night he and Billy had been apart in ages. He had slept in his old bedroom and his suit was hanging on the wardrobe door. He had a shower and put on the suit his mum had helped him to choose. It was grey with a pale blue shirt and a dark blue tie. He went downstairs and there was his mum in a matching outfit of dark blue with a pale blue blouse and dark blue shoes. Todd stopped and looked at her. “Mum you look lovely!” he said as Jason came down the stairs. He was also wearing a suit in very dark grey, again with a pale blue shirt. Todd noticed how all the colours blended well. That was down to his mum. She had been colour coordinator. She was the one who knew what Billy was wearing. He couldn’t wait to see. Just then Sean came down the stairs and stopped. “You all look lovely” he said and then focused on Todd. “You always did scrub up well!” he said. Todd blushed. “Sean” he said, “No no no!” Sean interrupted him.” I don’t want to hear that. I really wish you both well today and always - But if you ever want to get rid of him give me first refusal will you?” Todd laughed. “Oh it’s ok” said Sean. “That’s not going to happen. You two are like peas in a pod. You were meant for each other. If you could ever really see love between two people, I would say it can be seen with you two. Even your mum can see it!” He glanced at Eileen. “That’s what she said. So Todd, I do wish you well. I couldn’t not. I wish you all the luck in the world and may it always keep you both safe for always and ever!” Todd was filled with emotion.” Sean, I know how much that takes for you to say and I know deep down the picture is different, but you still said it and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.” Todd threw his arms around Sean and kissed his cheek. “Thank you.” Just at that moment Sean dropped his keys and Todd bent down to pick them up. He stared at the photo on it and then looked at Sean. “Scott and Emily? “he asked. “Er yes.” said Sean. “Are you er.......Todd began.” “Well, sort of” said Sean. “There’s a few issues, but we are getting on very well. I really never saw myself as paternal, but Emily is adorable. I obviously don’t see much of Dylan. He hardly counts as my son, sadly.” Todd beamed. “Oh Sean that’s brilliant news. Look we didn’t invite you to the ceremony for obvious reasons, but if you fancy joining us afterwards that would be lovely. It’s in the Bistro. As it’s a wedding I wouldn’t think there would be any problem with them allowing Emily in. It’s not like she would be drinking alcohol!” he said. “Well thanks” said Sean. “I’ll ask Scott.” It was Todd again who instigated the hug, but it was very genuine, from both sides. “Well I hate to hurry you, but I think you need to get some food inside you, son. It’s going to be a big day!” said Eileen. ”I’m not hungry mum.” Todd replied. “Well I’ll make you a brew and see what I can tempt you with” she said.” I’m off now” said Sean. “All good luck for a brilliant day. I’m glad the sun’s shining! Hopefully I’ll see you later.” “Thanks” beamed Todd tapping his arm and Sean left smiling. Todd was too. What a perfect start to his perfect day!

Billy had had his shower and was thinking what he could manage to keep down in the way of food. His stomach was churning. He now had so much more sympathy with the brides who stood shaking in the doorway of St Mary’s. There was a knock on the door. Damn. Answering the door in one’s underwear was never ideal and it might be parish business. He went to the door. “Who is it?” -he called. “Delivery from the florists” came the voice. “Oh right” said Billy.” I’ll just stick my hand out if that’s ok. I’ve just got out of the shower.” “No probs!” came the voice. Billy opened the door and pushed his hand round it as his button hole was placed in it. “Thanks very much” said Billy. “Is that it?” “All done” said the man outside. “Many thanks. Have a good day.” “I will!” said Billy.” And you.” Billy lovingly looked at the flowers as he closed the door. He put them down reverently and went back to the kitchen with a quick check of the time. He made toast and tea and sat down at the table. He took out his phone and debated whether or not to use it, sighed and put it on the table taking a bite of toast. With another sigh, he picked it up again and sent a text to Todd. It seemed so odd that he wasn’t here with him and he was missing him so much. He imagined Todd’s house and all the rushing around and bumps it must take to get all those people organised. That house was never still. It seemed odd in comparison that he was on his own, but this was the last time that would happen. Even if Todd were a hundred miles away it would still be as though he were there with him, because he would be his husband. He allowed himself to dream about that for a bit. He carried on with his breakfast until his phone rang and he picked up his text. “Missing you too my beautiful man. Will be with you very soon and then you will be stuck with me! That’s an idea! I will have some toast. Mum will be pleased! See you soon. XXXxxxxXXXxxxxXXX.” Billy smiled lovingly at the text before putting the phone down and continuing his breakfast. His next move then would be to go upstairs to get dressed for the biggest day of his life, bigger even than his ordination and he didn’t believe anything would ever come close to that, but that was because he didn’t know about his beautiful Todd then. Days surely can’t get better than this! he thought.

Billy was the first to arrive at the registry office. That was as it was planned. As he was on his own it seemed the easiest way. He went on in to announce his arrival to the registrar. He was shown to the room and he went and sat down. His nerves hadn’t steadied one bit. All he wanted now was for it to be over. How awful did that sound he reprimanded himself but he knew it was just his nerves getting the better of him. In just a few minutes, he heard general noise and chatter outside plus the sound of Eileen’s voice. His stomach did a huge somersault. He was here. The registrar returned to say everything was ready for the ceremony to begin and asking if he was ok. He raised his eyebrows. “Terrified” he confessed with a laugh. She laughed too and tapped his arm. “If it’s any consolation, that’s the same word I have just heard outside!” she said. “It will be fine” Trust my Todd to come up with the same word, Billy thought and smiled up at the registrar who walked to the front as the music began. It was an old song but Billy had thought it appropriate. It had been played constantly when the singer passed away not long ago, Cilla Black’s “You’re my world.” Billy stood and moved out to his position at the front turning to see Eileen walking down the aisle holding her son Jason’s arm and then behind them, Todd. The sight took his breath away, laughing inside at the appropriateness of that thought. Eileen and Jason sat in the front row on the left and Todd stopped beside Billy who he looked up and down and raised his eyebrows with approval before they both turned to the registrar and the service began. It was a very simple service and just what they wanted as they had sorted all the words themselves with the registrar. Then it came to the vows and Billy went first. “Todd, you are my night and day, my rock, my anchor, my amazing love. I promise to honour and protect you, to treasure and cherish you and to always be there for you whatever life chooses to throw at us. Take the whole of me. I’m yours, for ever.” Billy watched the tears grow in Todd’s eyes as he heard those words straight from his heart. And was thankful that he had been first. Todd began, “Billy it never occurred to me that life could be this good. My whole world suddenly came together when I found love with you. You make my heart ache and sing all at the same time. There is no one else in the world like you. I love every bit of you so much that it hurts. I want to be there for you to share your joys, soften your blows and cuddle up to you on cold nights. My love for you has amazed me and I will never let that go, not until the seas run dry and this is my promise to you.” There were tears spilling over Billy’s eyelids. Eileen had her hanky out and even Jason was rubbing his eyes. When they looked back to the registrar even she seemed touched by it all. The service continued. Jason stood up to give Billy the ring he then placed on Todd’s finger and then Eileen gave a ring to Todd to place on Billy’s finger. The marriage was announced and Todd and Billy each put a hand on the other’s face and they shared a beautiful kiss at which point everyone clapped and Eileen got her hanky out again. Jason put his arm round her and put his head on her shoulder hiding his eyes. Billy and Todd walked up to the table on which all the legal documents were laid. Todd sat down first and did all the signing as Eileen nudged Jason to take photos. He fished out his phone and started to snap. All the signing was done and the registrar took a couple photos of the whole group before they sorted themselves out to walk out of the room and “Take my breath away” started to play. Mr and Mr Mayhew-Grimshaw walked out to face the world!

 

Andy and Steph were both wearing rose button holes in the Bistro. There was a magical atmosphere as the wedding reception of Mr and Mr Mayhew-Grimshaw got under way. The three course meal was beautiful. They had one bottle of champagne on ice for the toast. Love was emanating from the special couple and Eileen couldn’t think when she had last felt that this good. Jason was well into the wedding spirit and for once not from a bottle. The table was cleared and the coffee and wedding cake arrived. Jason again had his phone camera at the ready and as the cake was brought back with slices cut beside it, the front door of the Bistro opened. The restaurant hadn’t been closed but there had only been a few people in at any time and they had all agreed to keep to the other side of the room which was appreciated by all. This was a different entry however. Sean arrived, his arm round Scott’s shoulder, Scott’s arm round his waist and one hand each pushing Emily’s pram. Billy looked stunned.” Ah sorry” said Todd.” I haven’t had time to tell you.” Billy jumped up from his seat and almost ran to Sean. “Oh my God Sean! I am so pleased for you. Wow! This has SO added to this perfect day! Come and join us!” Andy had already put two extra chairs in the family group as Sean had also checked it was going to be ok to bring Emily. Billy reached over and held out a hand to Scott which he held tight when it was offered. Jason whispered to his mum.” Maybe I should try and get a ticket on the other bus. That’s where all the love seems to be!” Eileen smiled at him and squeezed his arm. “There’s someone out there for you somewhere.” she replied. Everyone sat in a group around the table although they couldn’t all reach the small table for four. Emily put her hands up first to Scott and then to Sean who immediately unfastened her harness and proceeded to bounce her on his knee and make her giggle. Everyone was transfixed until Sean realised they were the centre of attention and he passed her to Scott. Andy brought out two cups of coffee and Sean took the cake offered by Todd. Scot refused. “But I’ll have some in a minute” he said looking at Emily. “She’s not allowed cake and she thinks all food in her vicinity is for her!” The reception went off perfectly, just like the rest of the day. The hours sailed by. Sean presented a special wedding photo frame as a wedding gift. “Sorry it isn’t more” he said “but I didn’t know we were coming til the last minute.” “If I’d known about Scott we would have invited you” Billy said. “No worries” said Sean. “It would have been a long day for Emily anyway” and he turned to her taking a toy and starting to play a game with her. He really seemed to be a natural with babies. Where did that come from?! Jason presented the happy couple with two special wine glasses with wedding day on them, apologising that it was nothing very original, but they were very well received. And then Eileen gave them two matching wedding mugs with their two names and the date on them. She apologized that it wasn’t much but she assumed they already had all the normal newlywed stuff, which was true. They were truly thrilled with such an original gift. “We will have to arrange official visits to tea” said Billy.” In fact, you are welcome any time of course. It’s difficult with work to fit things in though and I work on Sundays.” “We will sort things out” said Todd. “That would be really good.” This made Todd realise how much he thought of Church House as Billy’s and him staying there. Somehow he must change that. The rest of their time in the Bistro passed quickly with a real family feeling. The first to leave were Sean and Scott because Emily was bored and needing to be in her own surroundings, but she had been perfectly behaved. Eileen had loved having a turn at playing with a little girl for a change. It had been a long time since there had been small children in their home. She said goodbye to Sean and Scott telling Sean that he is welcome to bring Scott and Emily around any time and Sean beamed, hugging her. He then realised he hadn’t introduced Scott to her telling him she’s the nearest he has to a mum. Eileen’s heart overflowed yet again. After huge thanks to the staff, the wedding party finally left the Bistro and after hugs all round, even Jason, they went their separate ways. Back at Church House, Billy and Todd settled on to the sofa with a steaming brew christening their new mugs, raising them in a cheers to their perfect day. They were both on cloud 9. Todd was deep in thought when Billy honed in on it. “Are you ok?” he asked. “Hmm? Oh yes. I’m fine.” he sighed smiling at Billy. “Hey come on. There’s something” said Billy. “This day must be free of all niggles.” “I don’t have any niggles” said Todd. “The day has been perfect throughout. Couldn’t have been better.” “I was so pleased about Sean” Billy said. “Such a surprise.” “I found out about Scott by accident this morning” Todd explained. “He dropped his keys and I saw a photo of Emily on them.” “Brilliant. I’m so happy for him and it relieves my conscience too. Seeing the three of them together was beautiful.” “They aren’t an item yet” said Todd “but I think they’re working on it.” “We must invite them over and get the rest of the details” Billy said. “Since you asked, that’s actually what I was thinking about just now” said Todd. Billy turned, crossing his legs on the sofa. “What’s that?” he asked. “This isn’t your fault. It’s something I have to sort. I still feel that this is your home and I’m staying in it but I want it to be my home too. Do you see what I’m saying?” “Todd I’m so sorry. I hadn’t thought of that.” Billy looked very concerned. “Please don’t look like that. I said this is down to me, not you.” “No, it’s down to us. We need to sort this together. And thank you for sharing it with me.” Billy put his hand on Todd’s shoulder. Todd turned and faced Billy, legs crossed on the sofa.” I get that bit. It is important to share. I want us to have the perfect marriage. I know there’s no such thing but I really really want to be the very best husband I can to you. You deserve nothing less.” Todd put both hands on Billy’s thighs.” I remember the first time you did that to me!” he smiled,” and look where it got me. A new name! Mr Mayhew- Grimshaw. I love it!” “Me too.” Todd put his hands on Billy’s thighs and circled gently with his thumbs, gradually moving up his legs. “Todd! Now?” Todd stopped with the hands and lay himself across Billy, kissing him and feeling his nipple through his shirt. “Damn you Todd. I’ve got my brand new suit on. Please let me take it off first!” Todd manhandled the belt single handed and then the zip, moving straight inside. “Don’t worry” he said “I won’t spill a drop on your suit.” “It’s lucky I’m not going to get pregnant!” he said. You’d have me up the duff on the first night!” and this was followed by a deep groan.” How the hell do you do that?” Todd’s hand disappeared deep down and there were further moans and uncontrollable jerks. Billy grabbed Todd’s shoulders and the grip tightened. He thrust steadily into Todd s mouth until he gasped and shuddered before staying quite still, his head back. “Todd,” said Billy, “You said we were having a serious discussion!” “Yeah,” said Todd. “So we were. Do you know what?” “What?” asks Billy smiling, “Don’t tell anyone, but I’ve just been sexy with my husband for the first time!” “Well I can beat that!” said Billy.” I’ve just been seduced by mine!” Billy put both hands on Todd’s cheeks and kissed him passionately. “What do you say to an early night?” suggested Billy. “Sounds good to me” said Todd. “We haven’t even turned the lights on!” The two stood up and Billy grabbed Todd’s hand as they walked together to the stairs. Billy suddenly stopped. Todd turned. “What?” he asked. “I think I’ve got it!” he said. “Oh there’s no doubt about that! “said Todd. “No, shut up” groaned Billy. “I’m serious. What we need to do. Dump all this old furniture- or ask the church if they want to store them somewhere. They aren’t even mine. They’ve been handed down for years. We will buy new. Together.” Todd beamed at him and threw his arms round his neck, kissing his cheek. “Brilliant” he said.” I think you’re right. I hate this old stuff. That’s what we will do.” “I’ll see the church secretary in the morning.” “Oh yes it’s Sunday. Is your sermon done?” “Yes. Sorted it days ago. It’s going to be a big day tomorrow.” “Oh? Why is that? Todd asked. “I’m going to announce that I have changed my name!” he said. Todd gasped. “How will you explain it? Will you actually say....” “No, but people who know me will work it out so I can talk to them about it. I want to share it. I don’t have anyone to tell.” “I’m coming with you” Todd announced.” You are?” Billy checked.” I am. I’m not going to miss this. And if I get the chance to hold hands with my husband in a little corner so that you can ask your God for the blessing on our marriage that you so crave, then so be it.” “My God Todd! I didn’t think you knew that!” Billy said feeling very humble.” Now who’s keeping secrets?” Todd asked. Billy hung his head.” I’m so sorry” he said.” Easily done isn’t it!” Todd said and kissed his cheek again before grabbing his hand and resuming the climb to bed.

Todd walked in to church beside Billy and he was spotted. Joyce was giving out hymn books. “Oh hello love” she said.” How lovely to see you” “Hi Joyce. Thank you. It’s good to see you too.” Todd gave Joyce his best smile. Always works a treat, he thought. “I’m going to leave you here and go and get organized. Ok?” said Billy. “Yeah fine. You go,” said Todd. “Don’t worry. I’ll look after him” said Joyce. “Would you like to sit with us?” she asked. “I would love to” said Todd and followed Joyce to the pew where Iris was sitting. “Todd!” Iris greeted him. “It’s so lovely to see you.” “I’ll leave you with Iris,” Joyce said. “Must get back to the meet and greet.” Todd sat in beside Iris. “How are you doing?” she asked. “Couldn’t be better” beamed Todd. “Well that’s lovely to hear” she said. They made casual conversation until the service began and Todd had two willing helpers finding pages and hymns for him at which Billy beamed from the lecturn. Towards the end, Billy read through the notices for the week. “And one final notice.” he said. “My name is now officially Mayhew- Grimshaw but don’t worry if you can’t remember it. I’m sure you will get used to it.” Iris looked down at Todd’s hands and then grabbed it. “No!” she said. “And nobody said!” Todd explained, “Well, not everyone would want to know. There’s still a lot of hatred around it you know.” “Such narrow minded people!” she said. Joyce had been staring at Billy trying to work out what he had just said, but then suddenly out of the corner of her eye she noted Iris holding Todd’s hand. Her eyes nearly popped out of her head until she noted Iris tapping the wedding band and she gasped. Todd beamed at her. “When did all this happen?” she asked. “Yesterday” whispered Todd. Billy asked everyone to stand for the final hymn and the service was soon over. Billy went to open the door and he shook hands with everyone as they filed out. The last out were Iris and Joyce followed by Todd.” Ladies,” Billy greeted them, “are you in a hurry or could I take up a little of your valuable time.” “Take as much as you like dear!” said Joyce and they went back inside, Billy closing the big doors behind him. Straight away Joyce said “Oh thank goodness for that. I thought I would have to miss out on congratulating the happy couple.” “Me too” said Iris and she put her hand on Todd’s arm and kissed his cheek. Todd hugged her very gently “Thank you so much” he said quietly. Meanwhile Joyce had kissed Billy on the cheek and he hugged her in return at which point the ladies swapped over. “Now, what can we do for you, Reverend Mayhew what?” “Grimshaw!” they both said together. “You’re right” said iris. “It is tricky.” Billy looked nervous. Joyce noticed. “Billy what is it?” she asked. “Because I er have a husband, not a wife, I can’t get married in church” said Billy, looking at the floor. “No, such a shame” said Joyce. “Simple minded” said Iris. “ Call themselves Christians? Oooh don’t get me started!” she said. “Well, said Billy. “I would have to do it myself, but I was wondering if you would do me the honour of joining Todd and me as we had our marriage blessed. I don’t believe God is prejudiced or why did he make me this way” Billy said. “Oh we would be so honoured” said Iris. “Where will you do it?” “I was thinking just in the chancel, “Billy said. “Ideal” said Joyce. “Let’s go!” The four set off to the chancel. “I don’t know quite how this is going to go,” Billy said nervously “Just do whatever comes in to your head and it will be right” said Todd. “Where do we stand?” “Like we did for the service?” Billy suggested, so they swapped places. “Do we hold hands?” Todd asked. “Er”... “Yes” said Joyce, so they did. Billy closed his eyes and began. “Let us pray. Great and wonderful God, all seeing and all knowing. I call upon you to bless these your servants, Todd and Billy who stand before you asking a blessing on their marriage. I believe that you have no prejudices as human kind has and I believe you see this marriage as you see all marriages, as an act of total love and commitment. I therefore ask you to keep Todd and Billy in your love, learning more and more each day about each other so that they become even deeper in love. Never let anything come between them and may they always be as happy together as they are on this their marriage blessing day. Guard guide and protect them in their lives together and if it be your will, allow them to have children to bring up in their love. All this I ask in the holy name of divine love. Amen. May the blessing of God Almighty, Father, Son and Holy Spirit be amongst us and remain with us always, Amen. Billy had let go of one of Todd’s hands to make the sign of the cross between both of them for the final blessing. “Thank you for that” Billy said to Todd. “It was beautiful” he replied softly. “And thank you so much ladies. You don’t know how important it was to have you here. It made it real.” Iris had a tissue dabbling her eyes. “It was just lovely,” she said. “We are so, so honoured” said Joyce. “Dare I ask if we get to see the kiss?” Iris asked “Well it follows the blessing!” she huffed att a shocked Joyce. “That’s the best bit at the wedding!” Todd put one hand on Billy’s cheek and Billy followed suit and they shared a very special slow kiss. And iris took her tissue out again! This time Joyce joined her. Billy and Todd just continued to look at one another and then hugged. They then turned towards the two guests as Billy took Todd’s hand. “Thank you again both of you” Billy said. “You two are the nearest thing I have to family. I’m so glad you were here.” They both hugged each of them once again and went to leave. “Oh by the way,” said Joyce, “What’s the, bottom line? Is it to be kept quiet or can people know?” “I would shout it from the rooftops, Joyce, “Billy said “but I don’t want to offend people or in fact get in to trouble for it.” Todd gasped. “What? “he said.” It’s ok my love, don’t worry. If I get kicked out I will have no regrets. Their loss! I wouldn’t have it any other way. I wouldn’t sacrifice marriage to you to be vicar of St Mary’s. There will be other ways I can serve if necessary.” “Oh I do so hope it doesn’t come to that” said Iris. “That would be criminal. They wouldn’t catch me in here again if it did, I can tell you.” “Oh come on now Iris. This place means so much to you. Don’t make threats like that.” “It’s not a threat Billy” she said “I wouldn’t be able to continue worshipping in a place that bigoted. I really do mean it, don’t I Joyce.” “She means it Billy” she confirmed.” She feels very strongly about it.” “Well let’s hope it doesn’t come to that” said Billy. “The place would grind to a halt without you two. Let’s go home.” Billy took Todd’s hand and they all walked to the door and waited while Billy locked up.” I’ll see you later ladies and thanks again” said Billy. “Goodbye” said Todd. “Thank you” and Billy and Todd set off down the path towards home. Joyce and iris stood and watched them. “They are so lovely together” said Joyce.” If that stuffy bishop kicks him out because of it, that’s it for me!” said Iris. It really is. That’s not a reflection of God’s love, or God’s will.” As Billy and Todd walked home Todd asked again about losing St Mary’s. “I don’t know” said Billy “but like I said, my love for St Mary’s doesn’t come close to my love for you. He dropped hands and put his arm round Todd’s waist and Todd put his arm round Billy’s shoulders as they continued a thoughtful way home. When they got in, Todd was still quiet. “Todd” said Billy.” Stop fretting.” “I can’t Billy” he replied. “I know how much that place means to you. Oh Billy. Did I push you in to this marriage at the cost of the job you love?” Tears begin to fall from Todd s eyes.” Hey come on Todd. I’m not having this conversation. I have not been pushed into anything. And I know what I’m doing.” As Todd was still quiet when they went to bed, Billy realised that Todd was devastated by this news. They got into bed and once again Billy tried to calm Todd. He held him in his arms and smoothed his hair. “Todd my darling, I think I should have talked this through with you earlier, just to prepare you.” “Too bloody right you should have. I can’t get my head round it Billy. You are risking losing your career and you forget to mention it?” “Todd please! Todd burst into howls of despair and threw back the covers, removing himself from Billy’s arms and going downstairs. Billy shot out of bed to follow him. He was in kitchen with the kettle already on for a calming cup of tea. “Don’t come near me!” Todd shrieks. “Just leave me alone!” Billy doesn’t know what to do. “Todd please!” Billy pleads “Don’t do this!” Todd is still sobbing. “Sit down and let me make the tea” Billy pleaded. “Go away” Todd shouted. “Just leave me alone,” but he does sit at the table, head in hands. Billy makes two mugs of tea and brings them over, Todd still sobbing. “The tea is here when you want it” he offers. “I don’t want the tea” Todd insists. “Well when you are ready for the tea I would like to talk to you.” “Don’t you think that’s a bit late?” Todd talks through his hands. “Maybe.” Billy admitted.” I got a bit carried away with the wedding because that was so what I wanted, what I dreamed of. Nothing is more important to me than that.” Todd’s hands came down. Billy’s heart broke looking at  
his beautiful husband in such a state. Tears began to flow freely and he just sat with his hands in his lap staring at them. After a while, Todd realised it’s gone quiet and opened his eyes to see Billy s body language, unable to see tears. “Billy?” Todd said softly. Billy looked up and saw the tears. He moved his chair close to him. “I have hurt you so much” Billy said through his tears. “I am so, so sorry.” “No, no. That’s not right. This isn’t about me. It’s about you and your vocation.” “I really, really mean that if I get kicked out of St Mary’s I do. It would all be worth it. Nothing is more important to me than you.” “You can’t mean that can you. You were so proud of having that parish when you came here. I remember you telling Sean how you couldn’t be seen with him because of your reputation. Do you remember?” “I do. “Billy just managed to find a voice. “When did it become Less important?” “Priorities.” “And what does that mean?” “I’ve already tried to tell you. You aren’t listening.” “Ok. I’m listening now.” With a big sigh, Billy tried to explain once again. “Some diocese accept gay marriage with the clergy. I have to admit I’m not sure if Manchester is one of them. If the bishop wants me out I will ask for a transfer to a parish in an area where they turn a blind eye, so worst scenario is we might have to move, but I’m hoping it won’t come to that. If it does, well I’ve still got the most important thing in my life and that’s you. I’ve told you I have never felt this way before and I meant it. I didn’t feel like this with Sean. I wouldn’t have done it for him. But you, that is so different. I love the bones of you and I can’t get enough of you. Nothing is worth losing you.” Todd said “But you wouldn’t have lost me over a wedding. I would ‘ve been happy to just live with you.” “Our wedding day” said Billy “was a fairy tale day. Do you agree?” “Of course.” said Todd. “but your career.” “I will call the bishop in the morning and get an appointment to see him and find out what he wants me to do and we will go from there. I’m sorry if I have to move as it will affect you too and that was very wrong of me not to tell you, but as usual I have been burying my head in the sand, dreaming it might not happen. It’s what I do best. You’re the one that faces up to things. Please please don’t tell me I’ve messed up too much and you want out.” Billy’s tears start to fall again. “I can’t live without you. Please, you’ll break my heart if you leave me.” Todd also felt the tears falling as he pushed Billy’s legs apart and he knelt in the space pulling him into a hug, causing both of them to rock as he rubbed Billy’s back gently. “Oh my God Billy. Of course I’m not going to leave you. As song as you aren’t kicked out altogether, another parish won’t be a problem. We will sort it between us. Nothing can come between us. Let’s go back to bed.” he suggested and Billy nodded Once again they went up to bed, this time having sorted the chasm which was beginning to build between them.

Todd was up early. He had breakfast made when Billy arrived downstairs.” You’re up early. I wondered where you were” he said, putting his arms round the waist of Todd standing at the cooker stirring scrambled eggs. “These are almost done and the toast is ready. Why don’t you sit down and I’ll bring it to you” he said. Billy kissed the back of Todd’s neck and did as he was asked. Todd buttered the toast and put the eggs on it, putting the plates on the table before re boiling the kettle for the tea. “Don’t wait for me “he said “It will get cold.” Billy started to eat and as soon as the tea was made Todd joined him at the table. “So, over to the church today? “Todd enquired. “Yes “said Billy, “after the phone call. I can’t ring till after 9. I will let you know when it is if I you like” “Of course, please” said Todd.” I will be waiting to hear.” Sorry I forgot that.” Said Billy. I’m not used to people being interested in me.” “It’s going to take a bit of getting used to. ”Todd smiled at him. “Well I had better get ready for work” Todd said, taking his dishes to the sink. He bent over and kissed Billy who reached up and looked into his eyes.” Am I forgiven for last night? “he asked. ”Yes said Todd softly.” Of course you are.” Another kiss to the top of Billy’s head and Todd was off to get ready for work. He left with a hug and a kiss, wishing Billy a good day and the front door closed as things closed in on Billy. The cause of their first row on day one of their marriage had to be dealt with today. He waited till 9 and then with his hands shaking and a voice to match, he rang for an appointment. Luckily the parish diary was free today so he could accept whatever time the bishop gave him and the sooner the better. The bishop was free at 9'30 if Billy could get there that fast. Billy said he could and he grabbed his keys and jacket and raced to the car. He sat in the bishops waiting room, his knees knocking. He was terrified and he had to gain control. He would never make the bishop think him worth keeping on at St Mary’s in that state. He was called in to have his say. He told the bishop that he had appreciated the opportunity to take on St Mary’s despite the fact that he openly told the bishop he was gay. He hoped the bishop had had no cause to regret that decision. The bishop agreed he hadn’t. The bishop pointed out that he could see this was something big, wondering what Billy had assumed was the worst outcome. He actually asked Billy what he was fearing it would be. Billy told him he was afraid he was going to make him leave St Mary’s . The bishop suddenly looked horrified asking if there had been an incident with a parishioner. Billy, mortified, said there hadn’t. “Can’t be as bad as that then”, said the bishop.” God no!” replied Billy. He explained that in his eyes he had done no wrong so the bishop said that he must just tell him what had happened. He then blurted out that he had got married to the most beautiful man in the world and he had absolutely no regrets about that. The bishop asked if it was a parishioner to which Billy answered that technically he was, but he never went to church before he got with Billy. He told the bishop that since being together he had been to a couple services and will be pleased to help at events and the Christmas party or anything else he can, but he had no intention of getting in the way or throwing himself in the faces of people who might be offended. He understood the situation. The bishop asked Billy if he really loved his partner and he said that he did. He also said that his partner loved him. He was asked if he could think of any way in which his partner would hinder the work of the parish and he said that he couldn’t. He was asked if his partner would take issue with the work he had to do in the parish and he said he would not. He asked if his partner would object to him working on a Sunday and he said no. He was asked if having his new partner by his side would enhance his parish work and he said how supportive he already was. He was asked if his partner would attend services and Billy answered that being honest, probably not. He was finally asked if his partner would flaunt his sexual leaning in the parish to cause offence to parishioners and Billy said he definitely would not. After all that, the bishop paused and waited for eye contact from Billy who had looked at his hands throughout the meeting. Once he had contact, the bishop summed up.  
” Billy, you are a very genuine man and you have always been totally conscientious in everything you have ever done at St Mary’s. St Mary’s had been an old fashioned dying community when you took it on and you have turned that round. Had you come to tell me you had been caught in a compromising position with the scout leader, I would have had to take time to reflect on the information, but you have done nothing wrong that I can see. As long as there were no complaints from the congregation then I have no complaints either. I assumed that most people know your sexual preferences even though you have probably never included them in a sermon.” Billy admitted that people did know but no one had ever commented to him and there were people who would warn him had anything untoward occurred. “Then I suggest you continue in the same confident way everyone expects you to do. Go home and have a stiff drink to stop your knees from knocking.” Billy couldn’t believe that was it. He shook the bishop’s hand and thanked him profusely, feeling so very relieved and then with further thanks he made his way to the door, before stopping to tell the bishop his new name, but if it made things easier he was happy to keep to his old one. The bishop asked should that be the case what might be the response of his husband. Billy reckoned his husband would understand. The bishop summed up saying,” Billy go and live your life, love your husband, use your married name when you can, but if it’s looking prickly, revert to the original name. You have obviously not had any homophobic dealings up until now.” Billy said he hadn’t. “Then go with my blessing” the bishop concluded.” Enjoy your husband and continue to enjoy serving St Mary’s. If problems occur which you can’t deal with, then you will have to come back to me and we will see what action must be taken. I intend to keep you at St Mary’s for as long as you want to stay there and my thoughts go with you. Congratulations on your marriage Reverend Mayhew – he checked his notepad- Grimshaw!” Billy thanked him, thanked him yet again and closed the door behind him. He heaved a huge sigh of relief and set off at a brisk pace to his car. He went straight to the florists and found Todd on his own in the shop. Todd looked at him trying to read him but couldn’t. “You’ve got the appointment then?” he said. “I have” said Billy not untruthfully. “Ok” said Todd taking a deep breath.” When is it?” Then Billy beamed. “I’ve already had it!” he said. “Everything is fine.” “So you aren’t having to leave St Mary’s.” “No” said Billy. “Everything really is sorted. Everything is as it was” said Billy. “Nothing has changed – except the name.” Todd stammered. “I don’t know what to say. I thought......” “I know you did” said Billy “and you almost convinced me!” “Oh. I’m sorry” said Todd. “Don’t be” said Billy. “You made me dig my head out of the sand. I’ll fill you in on the details later, but I just wanted you to know everything is fine.” Todd reached over for a kiss. “I’m so, so relieved” he said quietly.” Thank you for letting me know. I’ll see you later.” “You will indeed “said Todd. “Have a good day.” “Oh I will. Now!” Said Billy. “ Byeeeeeeee!” and he was gone. Todd felt like the cat that had swallowed the cream. Their little boat was safe and wasn’t about to be capsized after all!

Billy was ready to put his plan into action to create a home which belonged to himself and his husband. It had taken them all evening to decide. They found a place which had everything they needed under one roof. The church secretary agreed it was pointless saving all the old furniture, so it had to be cleared. They hired a man and van and loaded it to the ginnels. They left themselves with the mattress and the furniture in the study stayed intact as it was a church room, used for meetings sometimes, so the church could sort that if they wanted to. The delivery was due the same afternoon. Tracy once again was peeved that Todd was missing from work but she agreed all the same, after his plea of never having had a day off since he started in her junk shop until now. The men brought the items to the correct room so they would just remove packaging and shuffle around until it looked right. They were delighted by their progress and just had the old mattress outside the back door ready for a further trip to the tip and everything would be done. They were about to sit down on the new sofa when Todd suggested going to the tip to get the final job done and picking up a takeaway on the way back. Billy was shattered but reluctantly he picked up the car keys. They ate the takeaway sitting on the new kitchen chairs at the new kitchen table and a take away never tasted so good. They did the dishes together straight afterwards, a habit they had continued from Billy’s bachelor days and then they took their mugs of tea with them to the new sofa in the sitting room. The TV went on and they curled up together, hardly aware of what programme was on. They were exhausted. They surveyed every room, noting that a rug was wanted in the sitting room to lift the neutral colour of the carpet and curtains were needed for most rooms. Their coffers were currently at an all -time low, so these items would have to wait for next payday. As they climbed into bed, Billy asked how Todd liked the new look, to which Todd said it was amazing. Then Billy asked the leading question. “Does it feel more like home?” And Todd agreed that it certainly did. This was definitely the home of Mr and Mr Mayhew-Grimshaw. Once again the world of Billy and Todd was complete.


	4. Life goes on.

Eileen had just finished her lunch when the front door opened and she heard Sean’s voice calling her. “Sean?” she said.” You’re back early!” As she heard no reply she headed out of the kitchen to find Sean standing in the sitting room with Scott and Emily.” Oh hello” she said. “Shall I make a brew? I was about to.” “just a quickie then ta,” replied Sean. “I’m on lunch break so I’ve not got long.” Sean ushered Scott to the sofa as he unfastened Emily from her pram and stood her on the floor beside her dad’s leg so that she could hold on. As Eileen waited for the kettle, she came to the kitchen doorway. “Is this just a social call?” she asked “or is there more to it?” “We have decided to make a go of it” Sean replied. “Scott and me.” “Oh that’s lovely! Congratulations” said Eileen, smiling at the three of them. “Hello then” she said to Emily and then, “Can she have a biscuit?” to Scott.  
“She can, but she’ll get crumbs all over your carpet” he said.” Oh that’s no problem” Eileen said going back to collect three mugs and a biscuit tin in two trips. Sean was now sitting on the sofa beside Scott and Emily had made her way round to stand between them. “She’s grown so much since the wedding” Eileen commented. Eileen sat in the arm chair smiling as she watched Emily with the biscuit. ”It’s so unusual to have a little one in the house” Eileen said. “Hmmmm,” said Sean. “Eileen we, Scott and me have been talking about where we might live. Scott’s got this rented place costing an arm and a leg and the greedy landlord is going to put the rent up again in three weeks.” “Oh dear. They have no idea what it’s like trying to scrape rent. Believe me I’ve been there. Greedy landlord!” “Well we, I actually, came up with an idea. It is only an idea of course. I was thinking that you have lost Todd’s rent and you would also be losing mine, which will make a difference to your budget. If it weren’t for Emily, I wouldn’t think twice about asking this, but she might make a big difference. I was wondering if we could pay you for Todd s room too and move in here, but I appreciate you might not want a little one in the house, in which case I will go and live with Scott. There I’ve said my piece so we will leave you to think about that. I have to get back to work.” He swallowed the last of his tea and Scott started to drink his back whilst Sean strapped Emily into the pram. “Well I suppose I will have to ask Jason” Eileen said. “It’s not a problem to me and I must admit losing two rents in one go will make a difference to my finances. Can I get back to you later?” “That’s fine. Thank you” said Sean. “Thanks for the tea” smiled Scott. “Wave bye bye ,Emily” said Sean and she did, with Eileen waving back. “I’ll see you at the end of my shift, “Sean called walking through towards the front door, Scott following with the pram. They left Eileen deep in a thought.

Todd was up first for a change, had a shower and was half way through dressing when Billy began to stir. “Morning” he said, leaning across the bed to give him a kiss. He was surprised that Billy didn’t respond, but instead pushed the covers back and dashed to the bath room. He wandered out the door to find Billy bending over the toilet, wretching because he had eaten nothing for hours. As he watched, Billy did a turn around and sat down heavily on the loo after which Todd could hear a lot of splattering. “Well it seems it’s straight back to bed for you, young man!” Todd said. Billy was rubbing his face and then put his hand on his head. Someone is banging a big bass drum inside here” he said. “Definitely back to bed!” Todd repeated. “I will make some tea and toast. That’s what mum always gave me. Must eat something to line the stomach, she always said. Oh and I’ll grab the parish diary for you to see what needs cancelling.” He was about to put all of this in motion when he stopped.” Ah. We don’t know if you can get back to bed!” he said.” I’ll be fine” said Billy. “Don’t worry. And if I’m not, I will still be here when you get back.” “Good point” agreed Todd. “I’ll just nip downstairs and I’ll be back.” Todd pulled back curtains, picked up the newspaper and then headed for the kitchen. He sorted the kettle and then put the bread in the toaster thinking how lucky it was not to have to use the grill. His mum had never bothered with a toaster. Too slow with so many slices to do. He searched the cupboards for paracetamol. He was sure he had seen some somewhere. He managed to locate them and took out a card of them to take upstairs. The toast popped out and Todd gave them a scraping of spread, before making the tea. It was on occasions such as this that he wished for a conventional marriage where his wife may have invested in a tray, but somehow he managed. He got to the bedroom and put everything down before noting that Billy was still in the bathroom and the parish diary was still down in the study. He ran down the stairs to get the book and he put it in the bedroom. He then headed for the bathroom. Billy’s hands were on his head again but he looked up as Todd came in.” I tried,” he said “but I felt light headed, so I sat down again.” “You’re much easier to manoeuvre from there rather than the floor” said Todd. “Let’s get you back to bed.” Billy stood up hanging on to Todd to try to get his balance but it was a big challenge, ending up with both of his arms round Todd’s neck. He rested his head on his arm. “It looks like we might need to call the doctor” Todd observed. “I’ll be fine in a bit” Billy protested. Billy finally got back to bed, landing on Todd’s side as it was closer. Todd helped him to lie down and pulled the covers up. “You feel freezing!” Todd said. Billy gave a shiver to prove it. He grabbed his own pillows to add to Billy’s to raise him up a bit before passing him two tablets and the tea. He helped to steady the mug as Billy drank.” God I feel bad “said Billy. “I know” said Todd. “Try some of the toast. At least it will give you something to bring up.” Billy took a nibble and another but then put his head back on the pillow.” I’m sorry” he said. “No probs” said Todd. “You have a rest.” He went to the bathroom and returned with a cold damp facecloth, which he put on Billy’s forehead causing him to make a gentle mutter, already half asleep. Todd took all the breakfast stuff back downstairs and put the diary under his arm. He opened the book at the kitchen table and found the correct place. It was Mother’s and Toddlers at 9.30 and then there was nothing until 2pm when it said visit Wives Group. It then said “posters” for late afternoon. Todd decided his best bet would be to contact Joyce or Iris so he went back upstairs searching for Billy s phone. It was beside the bed. The first number he found was Iris so he went back downstairs to call her.” Hello” he said “This is Todd Mayhew- Grimshaw. Hello. How are you? I’m fine thanks but Billy isn’t. He’s got some sort of bug, sickness and the runs, headache, shivers, so he’s in bed asleep at the moment. He was meant to be looking in on the toddlers group and the ladies group so I thought if I rang you, you would know not to expect him. Oh thank you very much. No we’re fine, thank you for asking. Lovely. Thanks very much. Bye. Bye.” “one down, one to go” thought Todd. “Now to ring Tracy.” He took a deep breath and dialled. “Hi Tracy. It’s Todd. Yes, I know it’s late but I won’t be in today. Billy is ill. How do you mean, why is that my business, my husband is ill, so I’m g....why wouldn’t I call him that? No I’m not making anything grand. It’s a fact. Tracy, He is my husband. You aren’t very observant are you. I do wear a wedding ring and an engagement ring before that. I’ll let you know as soon as I can what’s happening tomorrow. Bye.” And Todd put the phone down.” Oooh!” He made a face. “She is soooooo irritating!” He wondered how he managed to work with her. His next call was to his mum. “Hi mum “he said, “What should you do with tummy bugs?” Eileen advised him what to do and said she would come up around lunch time having been to the chemist. Todd nipped upstairs to check on Billy and then sorted his breakfast. Having finished, he tidied up and took a mug of tea upstairs. There was one chair in the bedroom which he placed by the window and looked out for a while. The bedroom was at the back of the house overlooking the garden which had a couple well established trees and seasonal flowers. Luckily it was very low maintenance. He hated the thought of gardening especially now he worked with flowers all day! What a job! But he did get paid so that was something. Billy was stirring, so Todd went over to him. He put his hand over his mouth, eyes wide looking at Todd. Todd looked around and found the waste bin, dashing over with it just in time. He held the bin and brushed back Billy s hair with the other hand, reminding him of his support. He offered Billy some water he had brought up earlier which he was glad to sip.” I’m meant to be going to the toddlers group this morning” he muttered. “No you’re not. You aren’t expected. I rang Iris. She was so concerned about you “he shared.” How sweet of her “said Billy. ”Do you know, I’ve always wondered about those two. Just good friends? What do you think? “ “I really don’t know,” said Todd. “And it’s none of your business!! I’m ashamed of you Billy Mayhew- Grimshaw. Billy smiled weakly and his eyes dropped for a moment.” Is there anything I can get you? “he asked. Billy shook his head gently. “You go back to sleep then and I’ll be back up in a bit. Going to watch some TV for a while.” “No work?” Billy asked. “Of course not!” said Todd.” I’m looking after my sick husband. You know that Tracy?..” but Billy was already asleep. Todd refilled his mug of tea and picked up the newspaper. He was almost startled by a knock on the front door. He padded out to the door and was surprised to see Iris and Joyce standing there.” Hello” he said opening the door wide. Come in.” They both came in and Todd motioned towards the kitchen as the front door closed. He followed them out.” I’m very sorry” he said” but Billy is asleep in bed. He will be so pleased to hear you called in. Joyce picked up a bag from the floor beside her. “There’s some soup here for him, well you too,” she said. “Oh you shouldn’t have. Thank you so much for that.” “It will be fine in the fridge if you don’t want it straight away” said Iris.” Brilliant.” said Todd. “Would you like a cup of tea? “The ladies declined and they moved towards the door, just as someone knocked. “Wow, two lots of visitors! You were our first callers, except for the post.” Todd opened the door to reveal his mum. “Hi mum” he greeted. “This is Iris and this is Joyce, Billy’s favourite parishioners. My mum. Joyce and iris giggled and shook hands with Eileen.” Oh he’s a charmer that one,” said Joyce.” He’s a great credit to you” said iris.” Hey I’m still here you know said Todd. “I’ll be getting big headed” “Bigger headed! ”said Eileen.”Hmph!” said Todd.” Not with you around!” With laughter, Iris and Joyce left and Eileen came in closing the front door and following Todd to the kitchen where he was already sorting mugs for tea. “Take a pew” he said.” I’ll just nip up and check on Billy. Won’t be a sec.” Eileen sat at the table and smiled around the kitchen. It struck her as having a lovely atmosphere in this house. Todd returned and went straight to the tea making, announcing that Billy was still asleep. Eileen emptied a few items on the table from the chemist and also sandwiches and a readymade pot of soup. Todd pointed out how lovely it was to share lunch here with his mum and mentioned how he had felt he was lodging in Billy’s house until Billy suggested changing all the furniture. He now knows that this is his home too and he is so pleased that she is the first visitor. Eileen reached out and squeezed Todd’s arm, before realising how emotional he was becoming. “Hey love, are you ok? she asked in a concerned voice. “I’ve never been so happy” he said. “In fact, I didn’t believe I would ever be this happy. This happy is for everyone else, not me.” he said. “What rubbish!” scoffed his mum.” I’m so proud of you, Todd” she said. “You have turned your life right round. I have to admit I wasn’t expecting this to happen to you, but all you needed was the right man to calm you down.”” Billy means the world to me mum,” he confessed. “I just would never have expected anyone that lovely to really like me.” “And why not?” asked his mum. “You only showed the world that heartless exterior. Underneath you have always had a heart of gold. It just needed digging to find it and you know that view even left me a while when you were so vindictive.” Todd hung his head.” I even disgust myself when I look back at how I treated you and Jason” he confessed, “but you hurt me time and time again and I just couldn’t take any more of it, but as usual I went right over the top. That I’ll never happen again, I promise. That’s all in the past. It’s funny what being a vicar’s wife does for you! “ “And that’s another thing that’s amazing. You in a church.” “I’ve only been a couple times, Todd admitted “because Billy knows I am not a Christian, but he has accepted that and he doesn’t ram it down my throat. In fact, quite the opposite. We had our wedding blessed in St Mary’s though” he said. “Oh did you? Couldn’t I have come?” “Oh mum! I wish I’d known you wanted to.” “Son, I think there’s a need for more communication,” she said. “You’ll be telling me your baby’s due next before I know it’s on the he way!” Todd roars. “Believe me, even the papers will know when that happens!” he said. “But you seriously are considering babies?” “We are. I don’t know if we will go for surrogate or adoption. We have rushed so much but I think that one needs careful planning and some space to make absolutely sure everything is right.” “That’s very wise” his mum agreed. “Not that I’m meaning something isn’t. As I said I couldn’t love Billy more if I tried. I worship the ground he walks on and I think he feels the same.” “I know he feels the same “Eileen said. “It oozes off both of you every time I see you together. In fact, even when I don’t. I can’t see live Billy right now and yet that love is still coming off you in waves every time you speak about him.” “Really? Beamed Todd. “That’s so very lovely of you to say mum” he said, “and so true. My only regret is what we did to Sean. I betrayed him and he has been a good friend to me when I haven’t really had any.” “Ah well you don’t have to worry about that.” said Eileen before a cough was detected from the sitting room and Todd leapt up. “Billy! How long have you been there? Why didn’t you shout to me? I would’ve helped you downstairs, but I just checked and you were still asleep.” “I thought I was a bit better when I woke up so I came downstairs.” “And now?” “I’m not too bad. Head’s still feeling a bit empty.” “I’ll make you some tea. Mums here.” “Hello Billy” Eileen called in.” Hey how long have you been here?” Todd asked. “What did you hear?” “Lots!” Billy smiled at Todd, grabbing his hand. “And all the lovely things you said about me. “Todd blushed. “You weren’t meant to hear all that, “he said. Billy kissed Todd’s hand.” Lucky it was all good then wasn’t it,” he smiled.” It always would be” Todd replied. Mum said how different I am now I’m a vicar’s wife, but I suppose you heard that too did you?” Billy smiled and nodded. Todd sighed. “Listeners never hear good of themselves “he said and bent down to kiss his forehead.” I’ll get you some tea.” Todd headed for the kettle.” Top up mum?” he asked.” I forget how fast you go through a brew.” “I like it hot” Eileen defended herself and held out the mug. “Oh you were saying about Sean?” “Oh yes. Your room is no longer vacant.” “Sean’s changed rooms?” “No not exactly. They’re making it into a sitting room.” “A sitting room?” Todd sat at the table. “You mean him and Scott? And Emily?” “Yes” Eileen continued. “Scott was being charged loads for his flat and I was about to lose two lots of rent, so Sean asked if they could have your room and have that as a sitting room and his room as the bedroom. It’s a bit squashed with three, but they seem to be ok. It’s better for them to have a sitting room so Emily can play freely. She’s a delightful little girl. I looked after her while Scott nipped to the shops the other day. It’s so natural having them there already and they only moved in on Saturday.” “Are you hearing this bill?” Todd called, getting up to sort the tea. ”Yes I’m listening” was the reply. “Brilliant news.” “They’re making a go of it, then” Todd said. “He seems happy and he’s devoted to that little girl. Brings out the best in him.” “I’m so pleased. That puts an extra plus on us because we obviously were concerned for Sean when this happened to us. His life obviously fell apart.” Todd took a mug of tea in to Billy. “Are you up to chatting in here or shall we stay in the kitchen? he asked.” I’m just going to try some tea and then have another doze I think” he replied. “That’s fine. We will stay in the kitchen.” He kissed Billy’s head and went back to his mum. “I’ll get off if I’m disturbing him” Eileen said.” No don’t worry. He will be asleep in a bit. We’ll keep our voices down. “ “ok if you’re sure.” “You must have a look round before you go” Todd said and you must come again soon. So how is Jason doing?” “Not well “said Eileen” but Pat is being very supportive.” “Hmmm” said Todd thinking much more than he said. “Is he coming to terms with Tony?” he asked.” I wouldn’t like to say about that.” she said thoughtfully.” He is a deep thinker and doesn’t share his thoughts much” “. No Todd said.” Well if he wants to talk I’m here for him” “. I will tell him.” “Thank you.” “Well I had better get a move on. I have to be in at 2 to look after Emily.” “You’re really getting in to this too. How nice.” Eileen and Todd chatted quietly while they ate their sandwiches with Todd checking twice on Billy. Then Eileen looked at the time and realised she must be off. She had a quick look in the downstairs rooms including the study which made her appreciate how different the rest of the house was now. She could see how the furniture had made a difference to Todd feeling at home. On the doorstep Todd gave his mum a hug, thanking her for coming and insisted she must come again soon. She agreed that she would. When he checked that Billy was still asleep, Todd picked up his iPad and settled in the armchair, hoping that Billy would be feeling much better soon.

Billy was fit and well and ready for work three days later, so although it was Saturday, he went in to the study in the afternoon to work on his Sermon ready for Sunday. Todd was at a loss of what to do, so put his head round the study door to say he was off to the Rovers and if he joined him when the sermon was done, he would buy them tea, possibly in the Bistro. Billy agreed and Todd left.  
Todd found Eva on duty in the bar and chatted to her. As they were chatting, she noticed his hands. “Todd,” she said,” have you always worn those rings?” “No” said Todd.” Not long.” “That’s not a wedding ring is it?” she asked? Todd couldn’t help the grin which spread across his face.” No, seriously Todd, why are you wearing a ring on that finger?” “Because I’m married,” he replied. Eva’s face was a picture. “Who to? “she asked. “You will know later when my husband comes to meet me after work,” he said, still smiling. “Oh Todd come on. You’re having me on. I’m sure you are.” “Wait and see then!” he said. “My husband has the two matching rings, engagement and wedding.” They chatted normally after that. As Billy was struggling between pub and sermon, he gave up quicker than he should have done and appeared in the Rovers long before Eva finished her shift. Eva having been a good friend of billy’s over an incident concerned with the factory, was ready to greet her friend, who she felt she hadn’t seen much recently, asking if he wanted the usual. She took no notice of him being with Todd and was busy pouring the pint when Billy gave his husband a kiss. She joined then chatting generally but suddenly stopped mid- sentence and gasped.” What is it “asked Billy.” It’s you!” she said “The matching rings!” “What are you on about?” he asked. Eva grabbed his hand and then grabbed Todd’s. “Oh my god!” she said.” Why didn’t you tell me? Congratulations!” And she reached over the bar to throw her arms around Billy’s neck, kissing his cheek.” Am I allowed to do the same to your husband?” she asked. “As far as I’m concerned “he said. This time Eva left the bar area and came round to share a hug with Todd. Before returning to her position, she said, “I still can’t believe you didn’t tell me! Your next drinks are on me!! Have you got any photographs? of the wedding?” “Ah yes” said Todd taking out his wallet and showing her a picture.” Awww that is gorgeous. You both look stunning!” Todd smiled. Eva looked at Billy.” Have you got one?” she asked. “It’s the same one” said Billy. “We liked that one best. We have other photos though. We are in the process of putting them into an album.” “Oh right. Can I see them when you’ve done it?” “Of course.” said Todd. “Tell you what, if you wold like to come up to ours one evening, you can see them. We’ll get some drinks in. Bring Aiden if he would like to come.” “Oh yes I would like that.” said Eva.” Thank you.” “We will let you know when the album’s done” said Todd. Just then, Billy’s phone started to ring so he removed it from his pocket and answered it.” Hello? I’m Billy Mayhew, well Billy Mayhew- Grimshaw to be correct.” He put his hand on Todd’s arm.” Who is this? Yes. Yes. What?” Billy s face went ashen, he covered his mouth with his hand. “ No. No!” he was saying as he handed the phone to forcibly to Todd. “Hello. This is Billy’s husband and he has handed me the phone. I don’t know what you told him. The voice at the other end of the phone said, I I'm calling from the general. We have Lee Mayhew here and we believe we were talking to his brother.”  
“Yes that’s right. What has Lee done?”  
“We have him in intensive care. We think he might have overdosed on drugs. He is in a coma. He is very poorly.” Todd quickly moved away from Billy. “He is going to make it isn’t he?” he asked.  
“We can’t say that for certain at this stage. We strongly recommend that his brother comes in now.”  
“We will be there as soon as we can. Thank you for phoning.”  
Todd turned off the call and went back to the bar where Billy was sitting motionless on the stool, just staring in front of him.  
“Billy come on. We have to go” said Todd. “I can’t “said Billy.” I can’t do this” ”Yes you can, Billy” insisted Todd. “We have to go. Now. “Billy just shook his head looking down. Todd put his hands on his cheek.” Look at me.” he said and Billy looked in to his eyes. “You can do this. We can do this. I will be beside you. But we have to go now.” Billy reached up to Todd’s face. “No I can’t go. I can’t do this.” “Billy, said Todd. “You are going to get off that stool and walk out of the door. Did you drive the car down?” There was a nod.” Good. Give me the keys.” Billy wobbled a lot as he tried to search his pockets. Todd took over and found the keys. “Ok now you can take my arm and we will leave. Get up off the stool.” The head shakes began again. “Billy please don’t make me shout at you. We have to be at the hospital. Right. Enough. Get up.” Todd put his arms under Billy’s armpits and attempted to hoist him up. And it was working until Sean walked through the door. “Oh my “he said. “What’s happened?” “I’m trying to get him out to the car. Could you give me a hand please?” “Has he been drinking?” “No he hasn’t. He has had a shock.” “Ok. How can I help? Todd grabbed Billy’s wrist to yank his arm over his shoulder and put his other arm round his waist. With another yank, he had him on his feet.” If you can grab his other arm that would be great” Todd said. “Ok” said Sean” I’ll do that. “Between them they managed to get Billy into the car. “Thanks Sean” said Todd squeezing his shoulder.” I owe you.” “So what’s happened? asked Sean.” Lee” replied Todd. “Ah say no more. Trouble with a capital T.” Sean went back towards the pub and Todd set off for the hospital. Keep calm he thought, not too fast and then remembered with horror that he had been drinking most of the afternoon.” Even more careful,” he thought. He got to the hospital and parked the car. He got out and went round to Billy’s side, reaching to undo his seatbelt and then offered Billy his hand. “Come on” he said “we are here. Let’s go inside.” Billy took Todd’s hand and kissed it. “I love you so much” said Billy. “Please don’t make me go in there.” “Oh Billy my darling, we don’t have a choice. They have your details and they probably know you are a reverend. How will it look to them when you don’t turn up when they contact you?” “Awww don’t play that card” groaned Billy.” I’m sorry but I’m desperate” said Todd. “You know why I don’t want to go in. I’m going to show myself up. I can’t handle him.” said Billy. Todd crouched down in the car doorway.” Ok Billy this is the trump card. What if they said he didn’t make it and you hadn’t got in there to see him. Could you live with that? “Billy choked and gagged “Tell me that’s not likely” he said. “I can’t tell you that because it is possible.” Todd said, “so we must go and see him. Once we are there the decision of what to do next will be up to you. We really need to go.” Billy finally nodded and Todd reached in to kiss his forehead and then stood up. Billy finally attempted to get out of the car and grabbed Todd for balance. Todd locked up and Billy took Todd’s arm to walk in to the hospital. Todd enquired at the main desk and he was told where to find intensive care before they set off again to find Lee. Todd felt like it had been hours. They found intensive care and the person they spoke to was the one who had phoned. She asked them to come to the family room for a chat. Billy was still holding on to Todd’s arm as they were shown in. They all sat down and the nurse introduced herself as Wendy. She was of oriental origin but spoke perfect English.” I just want to fill you in and hopefully find some background information from you before we see Lee, “she said. “So which of you is Billy?” I am “said Billy,” and you are?” “Todd, we are married. “ “ Ah ok, so if there are things to discuss regarding Lee, can I assume we are permitted to talk to Todd too?” she asked.” Yes of course” replied Billy.” Thank you” said Wendy.” When did you last see Lee?” Billy avoided looking at Wendy. “Some weeks back,” he said.” Lee has been making a nuisance of himself ever since he decided to move nearer to me. All he has wanted from me was money. He started stealing from locals and he finally kidnapped a friend of mine who was very unstable at the time. He sent her over the edge and she is currently in the psychiatric ward. I told Lee that I had no more money to give him.” Todd interrupted.” You forgot we took him to rehab.” “Oh yes. We, well Todd actually, found him in the ginnel collapsed, so we brought him to hospital and they started trying to dry him out but he was only here a couple days and he discharged himself. I told him at my friend’s house when we managed to gain access that I had tried to love him but it was so hard. He shouted and told me he didn’t want my love because I had let him down again. He had wanted ransom cash of a thousand pounds and I hadn’t raised it. I had a bit with me but I didn’t actually give it to him because he said we were finished and he didn’t want to see me ever again and told me to get out. I haven’t seen him since. It’s so hard. If I didn’t give him money, he made a nuisance of himself and If I did it just went straight to his arm. I’m a vicar and people come to me for advice and here I was unable to look after my own. I’m so ashamed.” He buried his face in his hands and Todd reached over to squeeze his shoulder. Wendy spoke gently. “It’s never easy dealing with addicts,” she said “and believe me, I have had lots of practice. Each person is different with different needs and different reactions. It sounds like Lee took everything out on you.” “He is all he’s got” Todd took over. “There are no parents and there is no contact with any relatives. They’ve only got each other really, but Lee only wanted to use Billy and make his life hell by demanding money and trying to blackmail him, which was working quite well until he kidnapped the friend.” Billy’s shoulders were shaking now but there was no sound. Todd rubbed his arm gently in support.” Billy has been worried that he hasn’t heard from him. He had given him addresses of places to stay but if he took one on, he just treated it like a slum and got thrown out. Billy gave him rent money but it never got to the landlord.” Todd stopped and Wendy took over. “Thank you “she said.” I just needed some background to put the pieces together. Lee was brought in at 11.45 this morning. He wasn’t communicating and didn’t know who he was. Someone had phoned 999 having found him in a lane whilst walking their dog. They had no idea who he was and hadn’t checked for ID. You can’t be too careful he said. So Lee was brought to A and E but he was drifting in and out of consciousness. We couldn’t get any communication with him. Before we could do anything he slipped into a coma. He has had a stomach pump just to be sure he hadn’t taken anything today, including drink. Then we connected him to the drug detox medication. He hasn’t come round since then at all.” Todd asked what sort of state he was in, compared to the usual state of drug addicts. Wendy pointed out that he had been a user for a very long time and continual use has an effect. He has obviously refused treatment. I had access to this from the time he was brought in recently, which was where they had found Billy s contact information.” Todd then said, “You told me on the phone that he is very poorly and I have heard of that expression before, suggesting that he may not survive. Is this the case?” “As is often said, the next 24 hours are critical,” Wendy replied. “That’s really all we can say at the moment. If his body responds to the treatment, then there is something we can do, but once he regains consciousness, assuming that he does, we are back to the same battle as last time where he can refuse treatment and discharge himself. Then a pattern will set up and each coma will be worse than the last, until finally there will be no hope of saving him, always assuming that he wants to be saved. When he was here before there were no suicide tendencies so I would assume he does still want to live and that is a good sign. We can go and see him now if you like, but I need to warn you it is not a pretty sight with tubes, leads and monitors.” Todd looked at Billy.” Er I’m a bit concerned about it,” he said. “As you can see this is Billy’s Achilles heel and Lee causes him so much heart ache. It’s been a struggle to get him here at all. “ “He doesn’t have to see him, “Wendy said. “If you like you can come on your own or in fact neither of you need to see him at this stage. You can wait.” “But you said it’s critical for 24 hours. Should that be the case this might be the last chance of seeing him.” “He probably won’t know you are there anyway. He is in quite a deep coma,” she said.” It’s thought that people can hear what’s going on, but not always. The decision is yours.” Billy,” Todd said quietly, changing the rubbing on Billy’s arm to tapping. “What do you want to do?” There was no response. “Ok. Uunless you say otherwise, I’m going to assume you are staying here and I’m going to see Lee on my own and then we will go home. Billy, is that what you want? That’s what we will do then,” he said, letting go of Billy’s arm and standing up. Wendy also stood and opened the door. Todd went to follow. “Todd!” Billy called, taking away his hands to reveal the true state he was in. “Don’t leave me behind. I’ve got to do this.” “You really don’t have to “Wendy replied,” and If your husband is willing to go instead,....” Billy held his hand out to Todd, who was beside him in seconds trying to help him to stand. Wendy took one look at him. “Todd, it might be worth you insisting that he stays here,” she said very quietly.” This isn’t going to do him any good.” “Billy,” Todd said,” why don’t you just wait here and I’ll just go in and see him. I’ll take a photo if you like.” Billy shook his head. “He’s always saying I let him down. This would be the biggest let down of all,” he said. “He won’t even know!” Todd tried again. “No but I will” said Billy. Todd turned to Wendy. ”Is there a chair in there? “he asked. “Preferably near the door.” “There is a chair” she replied.” I will move it when we get there.” “Billy” Todd said,” listen to me. When we go in there, I want you to just look at the chair, nowhere else, until you are sitting on it. Just look at the chair. Can you do that please?” Billy nodded.” Ok then” Todd sighed.” Let’s do it.” Todd put his arm tightly round Billy’s waist and Billy clung on to Todd’s arm as they left the family room. “Billy when we get to the room I want you to only look at the chair and nothing else until you are sitting on it. It’s important Bill, because I don’t want to have to get you up from the floor. Ok with that? “He got a nod in reply. “Ok. The chair. Mustn’t forget.” They walked along a corridor and into a ward with cubicles partitioned by curtains. As they got nearer to Lee’s area, Todd repeated the mantra,” Look at the chair.” The curtain was being held for them and Wendy had put the chair very close to the entrance as promised. “The chair look!” said Todd. “Nearly there.” Todd helped Billy to sit on the chair heaving a deep sigh. Then Todd looked over to the bed. “No!” he shrieked. Todd grabbed Billy’s head and buried it in his own stomach to muffle the cries, rubbing Billy’s back before turning his own head towards the bed. Lee did indeed look scary with all the attachments. He swallowed himself at the sight. Lee was so still and peaceful. He had never seen him like that. He was thinking what the outcome of this might be. Would be have to live with them? Oh no! Todd thought. That would be difficult. “Would you like me to leave you with him for a bit?” Wendy asked, putting her hand on Todd’s arm. “Billy, do you want to stay here for a while?” Todd asked. Billy replied with a shake of his head. “No thanks. We will be going now, but you will ring if there is any change won’t you.” “of course” said Wendy. “Would you prefer me to contact you rather than Billy? I only have Billy’s number.” Todd said “Yes, I think that would be better, thank you. I’ll try and protect him if I can.” “As I thought” said Wendy and picked up Lee’s chart from the end of the bed plus her pen as Todd read out his number.” And you are Todd Mayhew?” “ Mayhew- Grimshaw, but that will do.” Wendy made a note of it. “I’ll walk back with you to the door of the ward when you are ready” she said. “The restaurant is on the 5th floor. Maybe a cup of tea is in order. I think that’s a very good idea” said Todd. “Is there a number for contacting you or is that not necessary?” “I can give you the ward number but it doesn’t usually ring because of the noise so we tend to miss some calls.” We will leave it that you will call me, then” he said. “Perhaps you could call in the morning just to get an update, even if there’s no change?” “Doctors’ rounds will be at 10. I will attempt to ring you around 11, but don’t sit waiting for the call. Things tend to happen here on the spur of the moment.” “I can imagine” said Todd. “Thank you. Billy? Time to go,” he said, moving back from him and, ruffling his hair. “Come on mate. Up you get.” Todd stood on the side with the view of the bed in an aim to block it, pulling on Billy’ s elbow. He leaned across him to reach for the other arm. “Pull on my arm” he instructed and Billy pulled on both arms, enabling him to stand, putting his arms round Todd’s neck, his head on his shoulder. “I’m sorry about all this” Todd said. “This isn’t the normal Billy. He runs a busy parish.” “I understand” said Wendy.” Don’t worry about it. At least he came in and that was the main object” “Yes it was” Todd agreed. “Billy, time to go!” he said. “Hold my arm. “Billy opened his eyes, turning to look at Todd’s arm and reaching for it whilst Todd put his other arm round Billy’s waist. “Off we go then” he said and they followed Wendy to the ward door, which she held open. ”Thanks again for your understanding and for taking care of Lee.” Said Todd. “Unfortunate situation, but lovely to meet you both. Take care now and I will ring you in the morning.” “Good bye” said Todd as he and Billy kept on walking towards the lift which was empty, so once the doors closed, Billy put his arm round Todd’s neck.” I love you.” he said. “You’ll never know how much and he kissed his cheek. Todd was watching the lift floor numbers so didn’t retaliate. “This is our floor” he said. “Ready to get out.” The lift stopped and the doors opened, so Todd still holding onto Billy got them out of the lift and walking towards the restaurant. There were only a few people in there so Todd was able to find a quiet table so that Billy could sit down. “I’ll just get some teas. Won’t be long.” There was no queue so Todd picked up two buns and two teas before returning to Billy, who again had his head in his hands. He put his purchases on the table and sat down on a seat beside Billy. He nudged his arm. “Tea” he said and a bun. You've not eaten in hours.” No response, so be grabbed Billy’s wrist gently. “Come on,” he said. “Tea.” Billy tried to smile at him. “Thanks” he, said and he put his hands around the mug. “It’s on days like today that I thank God till it hurts for saving you for me,” he said. Todd blushed. “Don’t be daft” he said. “Yeah, well you know I mean it,” said Billy, putting his hand on Billy’s cheek. Todd closes his eyes at the touch. “If I loved you any more my heart would burst” said Todd, before opening his eyes. Billy’s eyes glazed over again but in a different way this time. He gave Todd a very loving smile. “You’re my world” he said softly. “As you are mine,” Todd replied. “The bun is nice. Try it. “Billy tried the bun and nodded, continuing to eat. He was coming round. They finished their snack and were then ready to go home. Now that the ordeal was over, Billy was able to stand and walk normally so they left the restaurant and Todd took Billy’s arm as they made for the entrance and home. That evening they cuddled up on the sofa and watched the programmes go by, until Todd suddenly asked, “Sermon?” “Oh my god!” Billy yelped and dived off the sofa almost bouncing Todd off it, dashing off to the study. Todd was alone with his thoughts. He started to replay the afternoon of Billy’s state and Lee’s condition, trying to think of what they were going to do about Lee should he survive hospital. He couldn’t quite assess how likely that was. Todd rubbed his eyes. He felt so drained after taking all the strain of Billy. He lay back on the sofa and dozed off. Some time later he woke with a start as Billy sat down with two mugs of tea.” I must have dozed off “he said. What time is it?” “10 past 9, “said Billy. “Did you finish your sermon? “Todd asked.” I did” said Billy. All sorted for tomorrow.” “That’s good “Todd yawned. “Sounds like you need an early night” he said. “Possibly” said Todd, but first there’s a problem I want to share with you.” “Ok. Billy turned to face Todd on the sofa.” What’s the problem? Can I help?” “Well it’s something I was thinking about and then it started going round and round in my head. You said next time there was something on my mind we should share it, so I am.” “Good” said Billy. “Thank you. So what is it? “ “I’m worried about Lee,” he said.” Assuming, which we probably shouldn’t, that he comes out of that place, we need to know it isn’t going to happen again. I can’t let him get to you like he does again. You go to pieces and beyond. If it continues I really don’t know what lasting effect it will have on you. I want to do something to try to protect you against it. It destroys me to watch you like you’ve been today” Billy avoids eye contact. “I’m sorry to have put you through this, “he said. “What? No that’s not my point. I’m not saying I don’t want to be involved. I will always be there for you. Don’t think anything different.” He reached out to Billy and held both his hands. “Billy look at me. “He waited and then continued. “I am your husband. Whatever life throws at you is also thrown at me. I wouldn’t have it any other way. I understand brothers. I’ve got one! He is a very strong initiation into what chaos they bring. But I would like to think that if mine were hell bent on destroying me, I would have you by my side supporting me and trying to sort him out.” Billy was indignant. “Of course I would be” he said. “Well there you are then!” There was a thoughtful pause before Billy replied. “You’re right. If I had to watch you fall apart I would be determined to sort Jason out if he were the culprit.” He reached over to Todd’s cheek. “I’m sorry. For someone who is meant to understand people for a living I do appallingly badly at it in my own home!” he said sadly. Todd put his hand over Billy’s. “You know damn well that isn’t true and it’s not what I was saying either! You’ve got this one covered, except when it comes to Lee.” “And to you it seems.” Billy added.” I never know where to start with you either. Billy” said Todd, “We are both learners at this. We are learning how to think for two when we have both only ever really worried about ourselves. If you know what I mean. “Billy nodded.” I do know what you mean. You can have people all around you and even have a long term boyfriend as I did, but having a husband is a totally different ball game. And one I wouldn’t change for the world. It’s a totally new experience. And a beautiful one that I’m so glad I have the opportunity to find out about.” Todd leaned over into a deep kiss. “Me too” he said.” I never thought I would have this opportunity. I’m so glad that I do. So, about Lee.” “Yes “said Billy.” You have a theory?” “Well not exactly, but I have come up with something” Todd said. “If Lee gets out of hospital in one piece, we need to know how to cope with him. We tried rehab but he didn’t want it so it didn’t work. End of. I’m suggesting that when the time comes to make decisions, we ask for a meeting with Wendy to find out what she suggests and maybe we could go to some rehab sessions or something to help us understand this from the inside, even if Lee doesn’t come.” Billy thinks.” I would be more than willing to go to classes if it helped us to understand him and communicate with him. I’m all for that” smiled Billy. “Thank you for giving this thought. “Todd smiled at Billy. “Thank you” he said. “That gives me some peace of mind at least. Even if we still fail we will have done our best. We haven’t really eaten today,” he said after a while. “What do you fancy?” “I actually fancy a takeaway” said Todd.” Now you mention it, I’m starving. My treat!” “You’re on!” said Billy.” I couldn’t face cooking now! What shall we have?”

Eileen was in the upstairs sitting room playing with a soft blow up ball with Emily. Both were smiling and laughing and enjoying each other’s company and this is what Sean and Scott paused to listen to when they reached the door. As they came through the door, Eileen and Emily both looked up and smiled before Emily looked back to Eileen ready to continue the game. “Tea Eileen? “Scott asked.” “Oh I wouldn’t say no,” said Eileen, “unless you’re waiting to get on.” “No we’re good “said Scott and went over to sort the kettle. There was a table in one corner of the room on which was the kettle along with cutlery, crockery, tea, coffee, sugar and a few other items. They had no water in the room but they were near to the bathroom so did not find it a problem. They had a table and four chairs in the opposite corner, a sofa, 2 armchairs and a coffee table plus a sideboard which had cupboards and a couple drawers and the TV on top. Space had been made for Emily to play and there was a toy box, a trike and a pram along the fourth wall. Scott and Sean had made the room into a lovely living area for themselves and they were very happy. Eileen had got involved with the newly found family and was looking forward to the time she spent with Emily. She was a lovely little girl and easy to occupy. Scott was making a very good job of it. He would never assume Eileen was free but they were gradually sorting out regular times for him to have some non -contact time with Emily. Eileen and Scott had even talked about him getting a part time job so that he could say he was contributing as well as just having benefits. He had worked since he left school until the day he was presented with Emily and had to hand in his notice. Although he didn’t begrudge a second of his time spent with Emily he did find his life a little shallow these days. Sean had an evening off from the Rovers tonight so they were going to treat Eileen to a meal at the Bistro. Emily was allowed to go there. Andy had taken a real shine to her, much to Steph’s amusement. Pat wasn’t keen on Eileen disappearing with “the lads" as he called them, but Eileen took no notice and told him to get himself a pub meal. Jason too was off to join Pat. As it happened, Pat and Jason decided to go to the Bistro but they sat on a different table from the others. They made the most of watching before they were spotted and both agreed how happy Eileen was in their company and both agreed not to moan again about their occasional rendezvous. They all left at the same time and then on arrival at the house, Pat, Jason and Eileen stayed downstairs while Sean, Scott and Emily went back up to their own sitting room. Eileen felt that their little house was full of love these days which made her really content with her lot.

Todd was at work when his phone started to ring. He grabbed it quickly from his pocket.” Hello? Yes this is Todd. Hello Wendy... Ok......Oh....so what does that mean?....right........And then you will treat him?....I see......Ok....For how long?.......no.......no.......Ok yes.....Thank you letting me know.....You don’t want us to come in do you?......No. no. that’s ok. Thank you.......bye.” Tracy came out from the back room. “Tracy I need to take my lunch break today.” “Why?” Tracy asked. “I have to nip home, he said.” I’ve heard that before” she said. And you’re gone for the day.” “No insists Todd. “I will be back. Don’t worry.” “Hmmm said Tracy doubtfully. At 12.30 Todd shouted to Tracy,” I’m off now. Should be back in an hour.” Todd walked briskly home, wondering where Billy might be. He tried the house first but he wasn’t there so he set off for the church. He opened the creaky heavy door and stepped inside. He spotted Joyce cleaning pews. “Hello love” she said as she saw him approaching. “Hello Joyce” he said, “how are you?” “I’m fine thanks “he said “and you?” “Good thank you. “I’m looking for Billy” he said. “He’s up in the vestry” she said. “Thank you” said Todd. Todd climbed the vestry stairs and knocked on the door. “Come in,” he heard and opened the door. Billy got straight up and came to him and gave him a kiss. “This is a lovely surprise” he said, putting his hands on Todd’s arms. “Is something wrong?” Billy’s face changed as he looked anxious.” I have an update from Wendy” he said. Billy went round the desk and sat down. “Ok what is it?” he asked. “He came out of the coma but he was in a bad way, so they decided to put him in an induced coma. That way he can get all the treatment he needs without fighting it. When he has had all the meds they will bring him round from the coma and see if it has made the difference they are expecting.” “Is there more?” asked Billy. “No “said Todd.” That’s it. I promise, but I wanted to tell you in person.” Billy held his arms out and Todd walked round the desk into his arms. “Thank you” said Billy. “For coming to tell me.” “ I couldn’t text you about that” said Todd.” I needed to make sure you were ok. “ “As long as you’re sure there’s nothing more you should tell me, then I’m fine.” “I promise that’s all I was told “Todd assured him “and now I shall go back to work. I’ll see you at home the usual time.” He put his hands on his shoulder and bent down for a kiss before walking towards the door. Billy shouted after him.” Yes, see you later. Thank you again. Bye.”


	5. Love and life

Billy and Todd were on the sofa together with their hot chocolate and biscuits before they got ready for bed. “I was thinking I might come to church with you tomorrow if that’s ok” Todd suggested. “Oh lovely!” Billy beamed.” Any particular reason?” “ No, only that I’ve not been with you for a while. I want to support you even though it doesn’t really mean a lot to me and I’ll have a chat with your girlfriends.” Billy laughed. “They would laugh to hear you say that,” he said. “Oh it’s the christening tomorrow. That will be a bit different for you.” “Oh good” said Todd.” I’ll look forward to that.” The following morning, Todd was showered and very presentable and the breakfast made. Billy arrived rushing around doing last minute bits before Todd insisted that he should sit down and have his breakfast, which he duly did. As soon as he had finished his toast, he gulped the rest of his tea and was once again on his feet. “Billy!” Todd exclaimed. “You ‘ll get indigestion!” “I’m sorry “said Billy “but I have some things needed doing. If you’re ready, we can go together.” “I’m ready” said Todd, putting the breakfast dishes in the sink and throwing away the rest of his tea, before grabbing his jacket and shoving his feet into his shoes. “You’ve got the keys? he shouted. Billy raised his thumb unlocking the car door as Todd closed the front door and headed to the car. Billy parked the car and passed Todd the keys. “You can lock it” he said. Billy was opening the church door as Todd dashed up behind him, flicking the car key switch. Joyce was in the doorway as usual. “Todd” she greeted. “How lovely to see you. Is there a special reason?” “No.” Todd replied. “I’m not a believer but I believe in Billy and I want to support him, so I will come every now and then to do that. “ “That’s a lovely idea, love” she said, squeezing his arm with one hand and handing him a book with the other. “Iris is down near the front.” “Thanks” said Todd and set off to go through the same conversation on arrival at Iris’s pew. She also gave him a squeeze on the arm. Todd smiled and chatted casually with Iris until Joyce arrived on the other side of him, signalling the service was about to begin. With that Billy arrived from the vestry and took his place. The service carried on as usual and Todd watched proudly as Billy continued to lead it. Then it was time for the christening. Todd’s heart melted when he saw Billy with the baby. He smiled very naturally at it and held it so gently while the baby cooed at him. Todd couldn’t get that Image out of his head. There was coffee after the service and the family had provided cake for everyone, so Todd socialised with people being introduced by Joyce, as Iris helped with the teas. Joyce told some people he was a friend of the vicar. There were a few who she actually told he was Billy s husband and they shook his hand feeling glad to meet him and he felt really proud. When everything was finished, Todd stood beside Billy while he locked up and then treated both of them to a meal at the Bistro before heading home to watch a DVD. Billy was on the sofa and Todd sat between his legs, lying back on Billy’s chest, Billy’s arms around him. The film started. Billy became suddenly aware of Todd running his fingers up and down Billy’s arm. “Er Todd?....” The fingers stopped.” Hmmm?” “What are you thinking about?” “Oh nothing.” Said Todd. Billy moved, causing Todd to move too in order to be in his view. “Come on,” he said,” spill!” Todd smiled and closed his eyes,” I was just doing a replay” he admitted.” A reply?” “Of the service. “Oh ok.” “You and that baby. It was a beautiful thing to watch. And the way you interacted with him. Took my breath away.” “Really?” Billy felt embarrassed. “Yes really.” Billy turned to look him right in the eye. “Beautiful,” Todd said. “Well thank you. “said Billy. Todd smiled and returned the fingers. “Todd there’s more than that “Billy said.” No, I was thinking about the christening, “he said almost honestly. Billy waited and then he tried again.” Are you going to tell me now?” Todd jumped. He thought the subject was closed, so he went straight back to his dreams. Billy rubbed his arms.” I’m sorry.” he said” I didn’t mean to make you jump- but that helps to prove there is more to this than you shared.” “Todd sighed. “Billy, that was it. You with a baby and how lovely it was that’s it. Honestly.” “No, it goes further. Something to do with me and a .......you’re thinking of us having a baby aren’t you.” “I’m sorry “Todd said, sitting up quickly to get away from him. “My imagination ran wild. That’s all. I’m just sorry. Ok?” Todd hid his face in his hands. “Todd, come on. Why are you being like this?” He started to rub Todd’s back gently. “Because I’ve embarrassed myself and I want everything all at once. I’m greedy. I’m so sorry.” “Todd, I really don’t know what this is all about. Why are you punishing yourself? What do you think you’ve done wrong? “Todd lowers his hands but doesn’t look towards Billy.” I pushed you in to engagement and then marriage and now this. If I keep pushing I’m going to push you away!!” Billy’s eyes shone and moistened at the same time.  
“Not a chance “he stated. “How do you think you can do that? If you need me to tell you every day as assurance I can do that but you know how much I love you so I really don’t know where comments like that come from. You must be very insecure in our relationship and that hurts. That really hurts.” Todd now looked at Billy. “No, please don’t be hurt. Don’t let me do this to you. I do feel insecure at times because nothing this good ever happens to me and I still can’t believe how it has, but don’t let me rush you in to things. Teach me how to be patient. It’s not your way to rush everything.” “Todd, “Billy replies. ”Do you think you would have been able to push me in to an engagement and marriage that I didn’t want? You either think you are all powerful or I am weak and feeble. That isn’t the case and I want you to be sure that I am not that weak person who can be persuaded to do anything and everything. I am not under your spell and you do not have a magic wand, so if I am rushed into something, it is never because you have overwhelmed and overpowered me. Don’t flatter yourself! I do have a brain and I use it. I am married to the most wonderful man in the world. Nothing would make me change my mind on that, not even you! So come here!” They launched into a passionate kiss after which Todd lay back in Billy’s arms again. Then Billy started again. “About wanting a baby, I believe you have to be at a certain age to enjoy children. If you are too young or too old, it won’t work out best for all sides. Something would have to give. I feel that I am not getting any younger and if we are going to have children, I can’t wait too many years.” “Billy!” said Todd, “You are not getting too old.” “No, but I want to be able to run with them and swim with them. So if your question was, should we look into having children the answer is yes.” Todd’s gasp was very audible. “If that’s what you want!” Billy added. “You’ve talked about seeing me with a baby. How do you see yourself? You would be daddy too don’t forget.” Todd stopped in his tracks. He really hadn’t thought much about that. He had been so bowled over with Billy. He looked into Billy's eyes. “I don’t know” he said surprising himself. “I really hadn’t thought about that in recent times. I had a step daughter who I loved and my son Billy didn’t survive, but that was a while ago. Look at the size of Bethany!” “Do you feel anything for Bethany now?” Billy asked. “I do if I see her upset but I don’t think of her on a daily basis. Are you thinking adopt or surrogate?” “I don’t know anything about surrogate but I would like to find out. Why don’t you look it up for us? Of course one important point about surrogate is that you receive a new born baby whereas with adoption you have another couple’s child and you can’t guarantee the age.” “I will find out” said Todd. “I don’t even know how they would use our contribution. Can it only be one of us?” “Todd I do know” said Billy. “But I want to. See if you can find out for us.” “I will” said Todd. “Now, let’s rewind this film! “

Eileen was just finishing her toast and was about to make a second cup of tea when she heard a knocking on the sitting room door. “Hello?” she called, ”Is that you Scott?” “Hi Eileen” came back Scott’s voice and Eileen offered a brew. “Lovely. Thanks “Scott accepted and came in to the sitting room. He sat on the sofa and put Emily down beside him with several toys to keep her occupied and then he smiled as Eileen appeared with two mugs. “Hello sweetie” she greeted Emily and tickled her causing the little girl to giggle and hold her arms up to Eileen. Eileen took her in her arms. “You’re up and about early today!” Eileen noted. “Yes” Scott said, “I wanted to catch you before you went out.” “Oh ok” she replied,” is everything all right?”  
“Oh yes. Everything is fine” smiled Scott.” Is Sean behaving himself?” she asked. He laughed. “Yes he’s fine too.” “ I know he isn’t mine but he is the next thing to it,” Eileen said, “so if he wasn’t behaving I would have a word and try to get through to him. He does sometimes listen to me.” Scott smiled again. “That’s always good to know, but no he’s the perfect partner really. He is very caring and considerate. We get on well sharing the space upstairs. It’s lovely having the sitting room so that we have our own space and we don’t get in your way too much.” “It’s lovely having you up there. I really like it. You are both very easy tenants, but then I don’t really think of him as a tenant as I said. He’s more family really and you just fit in so easily. I’m very glad you suggested this idea.” Scott smiled again. “I’m glad it’s working out ok with you” he said “because it’s so much nicer than the flat I had. It was cold with no atmosphere and the landlord was out for all he could get from me without him doing anything in return. A greedy selfish man. Here, it’s like being a part of a real family and like Sean I don’t really have one of those to call my own. And that’s what brought me down here this morning. I’ve come up with an idea and I don’t know if you will like it but of course it’s up to you anyway. You can say no.” “Ok said Eileen.” What’s your idea?” “It links exactly to what I’ve just been saying. I have no real family and neither does Emily. Obviously her mother doesn’t want to know her and I did feel she was missing out as a single parent family, but I have great hopes that now she does have two parents albeit two dads because Sean is brilliant with her and he is a very stable person. He wants to settle down and so do I, so I’m hoping we will both parents to her.” At this point, Emily, who was still in her arms got bored and threw her arms around Eileen’s neck. Eileen gave her a big cuddle, swaying with her. “Ahhhhh” she said in Emily’s ear. “That’s lovely,” she replied to Scott. “I’m so pleased to hear that.” Eileen started swinging around, causing Emily to giggle. Scott smiled. “Well this is the main point now. Emily will hopefully have two parents who love her and share looking after her just like other children, but she is still missing out because she has no grandparents. I was wondering if.. If you would consider allowing Emily to call you granny. I don’t mean you would have to take on loads of responsibilities, but just be as you are now really, with Emily calling you granny.” Eileen felt herself welling up. “Oh Scott” she said that would be such an honour. I don’t know if I will have any grandchildren. I do think Todd and Billy intend to have children but I don’t know when. As for Jason, will he ever settle down? I’m sure I don’t know. I would love to be Emily’s granny and I will love buying her Christmas presents and new shoes and taking her to the park and having her for tea. A sleep over is easy but you probably won’t stay here forever and I might have lost contact with you, but this way I won’t. Emily will be in my life forever. Oh Scott you have made me the happiest person on earth. Thank you. What an honour. “Eileen hugged Emily, hiding a few stray tears in her shoulder. Scott began to well up too. He wasn’t expecting it to be that much of a deal for Eileen. He wasn’t even sure she would agree to it. He stood up and went over to Eileen and hugged her and Emily before planting a kiss on her cheek. “Oh Eileen thank you. I’m so happy! If you’re sure though. I don’t want to impose on you. I nearly didn’t ask you because I was afraid you would be annoyed, but Sean said give it a go, take a chance and I’m so glad I did!!” “Oh so am I! “Said Eileen.” Thank you my love. Oh I can buy granny birthday cards and. Christmas cards!” she beamed.” And receive them! Even better! And if ever there’s anything I can do for you never feel you can’t ask.” “Thank you. So much. It means a lot.” Scott wiped his eyes. “Hey you soppy thing,” Eileen said, doing the same, “you’ll set me off!” With another beam, Scott said “Emily and I are off to the shops. Anything you want?” “No I don’t think so thanks love. It will be nice to be out in the sunshine. Make the most of the lovely weather.” “We will. We will probably stop in the park on the way back. What are you doing tomorrow? If it’s nice we could go to the red rec?” “Oh yes that’s a lovely idea !” Eileen agreed.” I will do a picnic. Pop in on your way back and we will sort the menu.” “Ok see you later.” Scott gathered up Emily’s toys and then took Emily from Eileen. “Say Bye Bye granny” he said. Eileen gave Emily a final hug and a kiss on the cheek.” Bye Bye sweetie. See you later. Have fun.” she said, waving and receiving waves back. She rubbed Scott’s back. “Bye Bye love” she said. He turned and kissed her cheek.” Bye” he said and left. Eileen felt all tingly. She was so happy. She went back to the kitchen with the mugs and decided she needed another!

Billy and Todd met in the Rovers after work. They sat in a booth, Todd with his arm round Billy until Sean came in to start his shift and Todd straightened up.” I don’t know why you do that “Billy said. “He knows we do it. We are married, for God’s sake.” “I know “said Todd but I still don’t want to push it in his face” “Todd, he has moved on. There is another significant other in his life.” “Yes I know there is, but I still don’t feel comfortable flaunting it in front of him.” With that the pub door opened and Scott came in heading straight for the bar. Sean put a hand on each cheek and gave him a slow kiss as Scott held his arms.” Oh sod it!” said Todd and resumed his previous position to raised eyebrows from Billy.” Ok you were right. Doesn’t that ever get boring? “Billy laughed and gave him a quick kiss.” Actually” said Billy, “considering he is standing on show, working at the bar, I would consider that inappropriate, If I’m honest.” “Yes I would agree” said Todd,” but this is Sean we are talking about, so I suppose anything goes!” Scott chatted to Sean briefly and was gone again. “ I had a call from Wendy this morning by the way.” Todd said.” No change. They still have Lee in the coma and they are still pumping him with stuff. So basically no change.” “Ok. Thanks” said Billy. “Did you find anything out about the surrogacy?” “I think we would need to go to the doctors in case they have other views and approaches because what I was finding was £10,000” “. Ah. I thought it might be expensive, but I wasn’t expecting that much. Maybe we need to go more for adoption. We could still ask for a baby and that way we would be able to give love to someone who has none, which isn’t so bad.” “That would be so like you” Todd smiled at him. “And you too I think,” he said. Todd nodded. “We would be better off spending the 10,000 on him or her instead. We would have to take out loans and we don’t even have a relative who could maybe carry for us. If I had a sister she would be close to my DNA and with your sperm, it would be straightforward. Both represented. But I don’t have a sister and neither do you.” “No” agreed Todd. “Shall we wipe out that possibility? Why don’t we make an appointment at the doctor’s and listen to what they have to say.” “What if they work it that they can find a surrogate mother but can only use my sperm not both. That baby would be no more yours than the adopted one but would cost 10 grand! On the other hand, if the surrogacy is cheaper and includes both of us, well maybe it would be worth considering. The doctor can best advise us.! “A good idea” agreed Todd. I’ll ring in the morning and get the nearest appointment.” “Brilliant. I can’t wait” said Billy.” Nor me” agreed Todd.” You aren’t just saying that are you “said Billy.” I think you wanted the surrogacy. If it was our own I think you would be more excited. Now that it might be adoption, I think you are put off.” Todd removed his arm and sat upright. “Don’t ever think that” he said looking a startled Billy in the eye. Billy put both hands up in front of him in surrender. “Ok ok. I got the signs wrong. I’m sorry.” Billy replied. Just at that moment Eileen came through the door and approached as she spotted them. “Hello” she said, can I join you? “Of course” said Billy.” I’ll get you a drink.” Eileen sat down as Billy got up and went to the bar.” How’s it going then mum? “asked Todd. “Fine thanks love” said Eileen. “And you?” “ Yeh yeah, all good thanks “said Todd. Any news? Is Jason ok?” “He's not too bad I don’t think, but he doesn’t say much. He seems to have settled down ok.” “That’s good” said Todd.” I used to bump in to him now and again. It still seems odd that he isn’t around.” “Yes it does. The house still seems quiet without him.” “I’m sure it does. “And you gone as well. I’m very glad I’ve got Sean and Scott.” “How are they getting on? Todd enquired. “They’re doing fine. Getting on really well. A proper little family.” “I’m really glad to hear that” said Todd. “I know it’s selfish but it clears my conscience.” “Well yes. That could have been yet another life you wrecked” she said. “Thanks mum” he said, “I really regret all that. I was in a bad place at that time and everyone seemed to be against me, even you. I lashed out and I’m sorry about all of it. But with Billy it was different. I wasn’t out to hurt Sean. I really wasn’t and actually it was Billy who fell for me first and not the other way round. And that’s the truth mum” he added. “I believe you Todd” she said.” Anyway, I can’t believe how happy you and Billy are. I would have to side with you anyway over Sean. I never believed you could be this settled and it’s all down to that man.” Billy heads back to the table with three glasses.” I know mum. You’re right. I never thought life could be this good.” “By the way, I have a new granddaughter” Eileen announced proudly as Billy reached the table. “You what?” asked Todd. “How do you work that out? Unless I’ve missed something important it’s not mine and I know you said Jason seems to have settled in but I can’t think he has already produced a daughter!” Eileen laughed. “No” she said. I have become like an honorary grandmother- to Emily.” She beamed at them. “I’m so pleased. Scott asked me this morning as he doesn’t have any family.” “That’s lovely Eileen” said Billy. “It is” said Eileen” after all I should be a granny by now and when are my boys going to cough up a grandchild? “Billy and Todd shared a glance which Eileen noticed straight away. What was that she said?” Is there an update on that?” Todd looked at Billy as he said. “We are ringing for a doctor’s appointment tomorrow.” Eileen gasped and clasped her hands together.” Oooh really?” she said. “It’s more than likely going to be adoption” said Billy.” Surrogacy could cost 10 thousand to start off with and we don’t have kind of cash. “Eileen s face fell.” Would you ask for a baby? “she asked.” Yes. That’s what we want” said Todd. “We want to be as near to the birth as we can.” Eileen beamed at both of them.” Could this day get any better?” she said.” My boys as dads! You will be perfect parents! “Todd looked surprised. “Do you really think I will make a good parent mum?” he asked. “Yes I do” his mum replied. “You are my son and I know the soft side of you not many see” she said.” And Billy brings out that side of you. I have no doubts at all about Billy.” Todd’s phone began to vibrate. He took it out to see who was calling. “Excuse me,” he said. “Won’t be a mo.” He answered as he walked towards the front door. “Hello Wendy” he said. He listened intently to what she told him.” Do you want us to be there?” he asked. “Ok. We can be there in half an hour if that’s ok? Right. See you then. Thanks for calling. Bye.” Todd walked back into the pub to see Billy and his mum chatting happily. He stood by the table. “Mum” he said, “I’m so sorry to break up the evening. It’s been lovely catching up. I’ll talk to you tomorrow about you coming up for tea if you can.” “Oh that will be nice” she said smiling at him. “Good. Billy we have to go.” “We do?” Todd nodded, kissed his mum’s cheek and set off towards the door as Billy got up from the table. “See you soon, Eileen” he said and followed Todd. “Bye Billy “Sean called from the bar. “Bye Sean” Billy waved a hand as he reached the door. “Todd what’s up?” he called trying to catch up as Todd strode up the road. “We have to be at the hospital ASAP” he said. “They’re bringing Lee round. Should we call a taxi? We’ve both had a few drinks. I’ll call streetcars.” He stopped and took out his phone to book the car. Billy immediately started pacing while Todd spoke to the switchboard. As Todd put the phone away, he watched Billy. “Billy come on” he said. “You’re all worked up before we even get in the car!” “I’m sorry Todd” he replied.” I can’t help it. What do they think will happen?” “I have no idea” was the reply. “They’ve finished all the treatment now so he should in effect be completely clean. They will bring him round and observe and test for a couple days before they decide what sort of state he’s in. They are expecting him to be fine but it’s the mind that they can’t re programme.” Billy is anxiously rubbing his face as the taxi comes into view. They see that Steve is the driver.” You sit in the front” Todd insisted. Billy was about to decline but Todd was already opening the back door, so he had no choice. They arrived at the hospital and went straight to the ward Wendy had told Todd. Lee was no longer in intensive care as the coma was induced. Wendy greeted both of them and offered them seats. Todd held Billy’s hand when they were seated and Billy smiled faintly, watching Lee still wired up in the bed. Billy felt more positive this time, hoping that this might be the start of an improved life for Lee, as he was aware how much work had gone into this project already. He understood that physically Lee was now clean but everything depended on his mindset and it was down to Lee himself to deal with that. They had been warned that this might not be a quick process as each patient is different, so they were prepared for a long sit well in to the night. When it got to 11pm Wendy suggested they might try to get some sleep and she would wake them as soon as there was a change. Todd put his arms round Billy and smoothed his hair. “You try to sleep” he said. “Don’t try to stay awake. I will sleep too.” Billy nestled his head in to Todd’s chest and Todd rested his on top of Billy’s. Billy was soon dozing so Todd also closed his eyes and hoped to relax. He felt relieved that Billy hadn’t freaked out this time, although that could all change when Lee actually came round. Todd woke a few times, checking on Billy and then on Lee but Wendy who was still there shook her head. At just after 4am, Todd became aware of his shoulder being touched, telling him that there was some change in the vital signs on Lee’s monitor. He moved gently causing Billy to stir and blink at him. Todd smiled down at him, brushing his hair back with his fingers. Billy rubbed his eyes and remembered where they were, looking over at Lee.” Is he awake?” he whispered. Todd shook his head but replied “beginning to come round.” Billy sat up, still rubbing his eyes. Todd put his arm round Billy’s shoulders and Billy rested his head on Todd s shoulder. Lee slowly came round. He was calm, not shouting or fighting the tubes. They listened whilst Wendy spoke to him and he replied quietly and rationally. She sat down beside him and told him what had happened to him and what they had put in to him, all of which he understood. After she had finished explaining, she told him his family was here for him. He looked over and saw Billy. He looked back to Wendy. “My brother” he said. I’ve been so bad to him. Tears welled up in his eyes.” Well he has been there for you all through this” she said. “They both have.” Lee looked over again and nodded.” His friend I think. He’s helped me too. He found me when I collapsed the first time.” They really care about you, you know, Wendy said. Lee nodded. “Your brother has been in pieces, “Wendy continued. He wouldn’t have coped without his partner. He has kept him going, literally.” “His partner?” Lee asked “How do you mean partner?” “Er maybe he should be telling you this.” “No,no I want to know. What do you mean? “Todd had been listening to everything that was being said. “Billy,” he said quietly, “Lee doesn’t know you re gay?” “What?” Billy said louder than intended. “He doesn’t know does he?” “No. Why?” “I think he does now.” Billy sat upright on the chair. “I want to know” Lee was saying. And then he looked over to Billy. “Tell me! Are you a queer?” Billy stood up and came nearer to the bed. “Lee, “he began “Are you one of them?” asked Lee. Billy nodded. “How long have you been that? How come I didn’t know?” “I never really got chance to tell you.” “Did dad know?” “Yes. I told him. He threw me out of the house and disowned me. That’s why I went Lee. I had no choice. I didn’t exactly go off and leave you.” “And you never said. You never told me he threw you out. You let me think you had gone off on your own for a good time and left me behind. Why didn’t you tell me?” “You had enough issues of your own. You didn’t need mine, as well” he said. “You let me think you had gone and left me on purpose and you never told me it wasn’t true. Have you had a hard time because of it?” “At times, yes.” “And now?” he asked. “Now? I feel like I am the luckiest man on earth, because I have a husband who loves me more than life itself and that’s how I feel about him too.” Lee nodded thoughtfully. “I’m glad for you Billy” he said. “I really am. And that bit I said the other day?” “Er what was that Lee? “Lee avoided looking at Billy.” I said I didn’t want your love. That’s the biggest lie I’ve ever told. I do want your love Billy.” The tears began to spill down his cheeks. “So much. That’s all I want really. For you to love me.” “I always have Lee,” Billy said. He looked for clearance from Wendy and went closer, taking Lee in his arms. “I will always love you Lee. My love is unconditional because you are my little brother.” Lee reached up and put his arms round Billy’s neck, clutching at his jacket “I’m sorry for all the nasty things I said to you. I will try to sort myself out and make you proud of me” he said” if you still want me in your life.” “Of course I want you” Billy said, kissing Lee’s cheek. “There will always be a place for you in my life-and my heart. I don’t deserve you” Lee states. “What you need to do is sort yourself out.” said Billy.” You are completely clean now. No drugs in you at all. So it’s up to you where you go from here. You can make a new start, make something of your life and I will be there to support you.” “I will do that Billy. I will. I promise” Lee said. Billy took Lee’s hands away so that he could stand up. He then remembered that Wendy and her team were still there albeit trying to blend into the equipment in the room. “I’m sorry” he said. Wendy stopped him. “That was the most amazing healing” she said. “The best he could have had.” Billy nodded and went back to Todd clutching on to him as Lee had previously, sinking his head in Todd’s shoulder and sobbing quietly. Todd held him tightly whispering in his ear of how wonderful he was. After a few minutes they sat back on their chairs as the staff continued with their work. When she had finished, Wendy came over to them, suggesting they said goodnight and then she would like a quick chat in her office before they went home. They promised Lee they would be back to see him next day and followed Wendy to her office, noting in surprise that it was almost 6am. Wendy thanked Billy and again told him how important that was to Lee’s recovery. Todd took the opportunity to mention to Wendy that they had wanted her advice of where to go from there. Wendy recommended that Lee should move in to a sort of half -way house where there were staff to keep an eye on him and help him to keep away from drugs. She said he would never be thrown out of there but hopefully as his confidence grew, he would feel ready to move out. Todd was really pleased about this describing it as just what they had hoped for. Wendy pointed out that there would be lows as well as highs in the process of recovery but from all that had happened to him she had a very positive feel about it, but really that’s all she could say at this point. She then thanked them again on Lee’s behalf and also on her own because they had been so supportive. She ended with saying she would still be looking after Lee but they would hear less of her now and she strongly suggested they should go home and get some sleep. She gave both a strong hand shake and opened the door to let Billy and Todd pass out into the corridor and on their way to call a taxi and get home. When they got there they both fell into bed as they were, cuddled together and went straight to sleep.” Two hours” Todd thought. “I’m meant to be at work in less than two hours. Todd groaned and picked up his phone to text Tracy. “Sorry. Family emergency. Just got home. Need some sleep, but will be in ASAP.” And then he went to sleep, joining Billy who was already breathing deeply. In minutes he too drifted off into a well-earned sleep, remembering he must call his mother tomorrow about coming for tea and doctors’ surgery for the adoption appointment. They were going to have to visit Lee too. What a busy day! Was there really going to be time to go to work too?!

Billy and Todd were happy with their visit to the GP. She was very helpful. She did bring the price of surrogacy down slightly but not enough and she was able to tell them that they could stipulate the age of an adopted child but the more stipulations, the longer the procedure. She set the ball rolling for them to go to an adoption centre where all their details were noted and the formalities seen to go smoothly. There seemed to be no obvious obstacles to their adopting. They visited Eileen who obviously said how brilliant she thought they would be as parents and they interviewed Iris and Joyce at the church. They visited Church House and its grounds which seemed very suitable accommodation. They passed everything with flying colours and were then asked for their preferences. They had no preference for a boy or a girl but would like it to be as young as possible. All Is were dotted and Ts crossed until all they had to do was wait for the availability of a child for them. Lee had a further week in hospital before Billy and Todd picked him up and drove him to the half-way house Wendy had talked about. Lee had no belongings, so Billy and Todd bought essentials for him and he found them waiting when he entered his room. He hugged both of them, appreciating all they had done for him. He remained in the sheltered accommodation but managed to get a job along with an adult class for maths and English as he had left school with no qualifications. He came to Church House for tea every week so that they could note his progress and that had been his suggestion, much to Todd’s relief. Eileen also booked a regular slot for tea at Church House. Billy and Todd laughed that it was becoming like a restaurant serving evening meals. They wished their cuisine could warrant doing just that! Sarah, after her breakdown had managed to sort her life out and returned home to continue being a mother to baby Harry. She allowed Marian access to Harry, but Max did to want to be involved with her, which suited Sarah. Jason remained away from the street but did Skype each week as an update. Billy and Todd set to to decorate the nursery using lemon and pastel green rather than pink or blue. Once it was well established, it was just a matter of waiting. It was then of November when they got the call. They had to go in to the office for an update. They both felt somewhat apprehensive though they didn’t know why. When they arrived everything seemed normal with the sort of questions they had expected, but then things seemed to change. The person in charge, Julia began talking less generally. In the same moment Billy and Todd each thought that it seemed like they must be near the top of the list. They were still totally gob smacked when Julia asked them to follow her and that was when they first set eyes on their little daughter. She was 10 days old and the mother had insisted throughout the pregnancy that she had no intention of keeping the child so there were no complications. They each held the little girl as Julia watched them. They made all forthright comment and drooled over the little girl, impressing Julia with their genuine responses of total shock at holding their baby. They had thought of some names but didn’t want to commit immediately because it had to be just right. They were told to return the following day with a car seat and once the final paper work was completed they could take their daughter home. Before they left Todd asked to take a few photographs to show off overnight. They were so excited, that as Julia was talking to them, they had held hands, fingers entwined and gripped tightly. When they got into the car they squeaked with delight and hugged and kissed before finally putting their arms around each other’s necks, gripping tightly. They then set off towards the nearest baby shop for supplies. They deposited all of this in the house before setting off to find Eileen. They found her with Pat Phelan in the pub. He was still around but having left the family home, Todd felt more inclined to allow his mother to do whatever she wanted as long as she was happy. Life is too short he decided, even though he was still certain that Phelan was a very different person from the one she saw. They came over to their table. “Hello “smiled Eileen. “Take a seat. We will get the drinks in, “said Pat. “Ok thanks” accepted Todd, attempting a smile and he sat down by his mum with Billy hovering at the end of the bench.” We have something to show you” he said, trying to stifle the huge grin which was already spreading across his face. Eileen looked between them as Billy also began to grin. “I’ve a good feeling about this” she said as Todd passed her his phone. “Eileen’s eyes widened and she looked at Todd and then Billy. “Is she yours?” she asked tentatively. Billy nodded as though his head might fall off and Todd s grin got even bigger, if that were possible. “She is” he finally replied, as tears welled up in his eyes. “Oh my God boys,” she said looking again as Todd slid on to the next photo. “Oh my! Ahh! She’s beautiful! were the comments as she viewed. She held Todd’s arm as she gazed at the phone. “Again” she said when he stopped flicking, so he reversed the procedure as Eileen watched very wide eyed and speechless. Billy was standing close to Todd with his hands on his shoulders squinting to get a glimpse of his daughter. Eileen reached out to hug Todd as Billy removed his hands and grabbed the phone for a better look, just as Pat arrived with the drinks. Eileen kissed Todd and reached a hand towards Billy which he took and squeezed. “You’ll get your hug later” she said. “Pat, we’ve got something to celebrate! Show him Todd.” Billy passed over the phone.” Yours? he asked, hardly needing a reply by all the grinning faces. “Are there more? “he asked and then flicked the pictures, actually seeming to look at them carefully, Todd noticed and he was grateful for that. “She’s a lovely little girl” he smiled and then offered the phone to Billy who put it on the table. Todd picked it up and couldn’t resist another look watched by Eileen. “Does she have a name? “Pat asked. “Not yet” Billy and Todd both replied. “She has no official name as she’s not been registered yet so we will get to do that and the hospital have just put baby Mayhew- Grimshaw on the tag. “What a mouthful! Poor little thing” said Eileen. “Imagine learning to write that lot at school,” said Pat. Everyone laughed. “So do you have a list? “asked Eileen as she shuffled round to let Billy in on the end of the seat. “We do have one, but we’re going to see what suits her before we decide” said Billy. “Give me an example” said Eileen. “One we were thinking of was kai.” Todd said. “Oh that’s pretty” Eileen said with Pat nodding.” But it may not be” added Todd.” There will probably be two middle names too, but they will change round to fit with how they sound with the first name. At least she won’t have to learn to write all of them initially!” he adds, laughing towards Pat.” What are they?” asked Eileen. “It will be Mary after Billy’s mum and Eileen.” Todd grinned. “With Kai it will be Mary Eileen because it flows better.” Eileen was bursting with pride. “Well here’s to the new addition whatever her name is! “Pat held up his glass and everyone cheered. They chatted generally and drank their drinks. after which Todd turned to Billy. “Right,” he said ”Things to sort at home, so time to go!” “True” said Billy and stood up, followed by Todd. “Thank you for sharing her “Eileen beamed at them. “She’s beautiful.” “We will let you know when we have her home tomorrow so hopefully you can come up and meet her,” Todd said. “Tomorrow! So soon! Oh I can’t wait!” said Eileen. “See you soon.” Billy waved. “Thanks for the drinks Pat.” Pat nodded. “Byeee” said Todd and grabbed Billy’s arm as they left. They were pleased that they had very little to sort out at home for the new arrival and they sorted the clothes to take with them to the hospital next day. They were both bubbling with pride and excitement. Is she really ours Todd?” Billy asked, still beaming. “I know” was the reply. “It hardly seems possible. Mum was pleased wasn’t she.” “Oh my yes. There’s no doubt this little girl will be well loved. I think we made the right decision” said Billy. “What does it matter about DNA. We will be making this baby totally ours.” “We certainly will “Todd agreed.” I adore her already and we’ve hardly met! “They stopped for a hug.” Let’s get this done and have a quick snack” said Billy.” I will be glad to get to bed. Tomorrow will come quicker.” Todd laughed. “Like waiting for Father Christmas! “Todd laughed. “Very much so!” said Billy. “I’ll see what’s in the freezer.” As they ate they considered the other names on the girls’ list. “Will she forever be annoyed that people pronounce it Kay?” Billy wondered. “Possibly. But it has to be that spelling. To make it different. What else have we got?” “Josie.” “ No.” “Megan.” “ No.” “ Belle.” “ No.” “ Eve.” “ N...Oh. We need a short one. Eve. hmmm.” Todd stopped. “You like Eve? Actually, yes I do quite like that. Eva will think it’s after her though! “ “Oh great. That’s not so good is it. “said Billy. “We just tell her it’s not.” “ Sorted “Todd replied.” Eve Mary Eileen Mayhew- Grimshaw. It’s still a mouthful isn’t it.” “ We can leave out Mary if you like” suggested Billy. “It’s not as if she would know. Well, not directly anyway.” “ We did decide on both names though,” Todd was uncertain. “Eve Eileen. But we can’t have mine without yours. That’s not fair.” Todd said. “It’s really not a problem. I actually like the sound of eve Eileen. It has a nice ring. Mary sounds like it’s thrown in for good measure.” Todd didn’t look happy. “Hey come on. What do you think sounds better of all of them- Eve Mary Eileen, Eve Mary, Eve Eileen, Kia Mary Eileen, Kai Mary, Kai Eileen...? Kai Mary sounds nice or Eve Eileen, he shared.” “ Well why don’t we go for Eve Eileen” said Billy. “Eileen is the important name. If we have another girl we can have kai Mary. What do you think? Apart from your issue with leaving out my mother’s name, what do you think?” Todd decided.” I think you’re right,” he said.” Eve and Eileen go and kai and Mary. I think my mum would be disappointed now she’s been told Eileen would be one of the names. So we go for Eve Eileen?” Billy asked. Todd smiled.” I think so if you’re happy with that.” “ Eve Eileen it is then, Evie!”

Eileen set off for church house. She could have done with a key really so that she could put the kettle on if nothing else as they had left at 10 so would have been glad of a brew. She then received a text. “Forgot to say there’s a key behind the plant pot on the doorstep. Let yourself in. We will be glad of a brew when we get back.” “Perfect “thought Eileen and soon found the key to open the front door. She set everything ready to make tea when they arrived and hunted around and made sandwiches ready for their return. She heard sounds outdoors as she finished putting sandwiches in sandwich bags and putting them in the fridge. She went towards the front door and noted the car, so she opened it and waited. Billy was driving and Todd was in the back with the car seat beside him in which slept Eve Eileen. Billy and Todd bustled about emptying things from the car before trying to remove the car seat with the sleeping infant. It was Billy who was volunteered for that job. Eve remained in the car seat asleep while the three of them enjoyed the tea and sandwiches prepared by Eileen and the camera on Billy’s phone was in action once more. Todd took his mum upstairs to see Eve's room which was received with enthusiasm. Eileen stayed until Eve woke up and watched her first feed at home. She also checked on the final name which she loved. She was looking forward to pushing a pram down the cobbles one day soon and spending some time with her two granddaughters. She was considering the red rec but decided they would be too much of a handful on her own. Billy asked if it could be possible for her to look after Eve for a few mornings a week so that he could work either in the study or at the church. They didn’t want Todd to change his hours and Billy’s time was more flexible. He told her he was going straight for it rather than pussyfooting around the subject. Eileen agreed immediately with no hesitation saying she also had flexible hours and could easily accommodate different shifts for them. She pointed out that she was only too pleased to be a hands on granny especially as they had no other family around. She suggested that Billy wrote down his time table and then they would look at it and see how best Eve could be included. Todd said he would be missing out on the fun but Eileen told him they would have picnic lunches on the benches opposite the shop when the weather permitted and she may need to deliver Eve to him at the end of the day to begin her shift at street cars. “Do you hear that Evie? Todd exclaimed. “Almost sorted already!” “Eve “said Eileen. “Yes “said Billy. “Her name will be Eve. Nice and short for her learning to write, but she will be known as Evie.” After Eileen left, Billy sat down with his note pad and wrote out his time table so that they could work through it with Eileen. No time like the present he decided so as Evie was asleep he left Todd with her and he drove off to see Eileen. When he returned, he had everything sorted and Todd was feeding Evie. “Hey” Billy dashed over and crouched down with his hands on Todd’s knees. “That just looks so perfect, so natural.” They shared smiles. He got up and stood behind Todd, hands on his shoulders to have better view, and then began kissing his neck gently. “How perfect does life get,” he said. “What have we done to deserve all this happiness!”

Billy and Todd, a relationship which seemed to come from nowhere and yet it was a marriage set in heaven. With their little girl they became a proper family with granny Eileen playing a very important part. As they began to plan for the best Christmas ever with Evie, they never forgot to thank whoever for allowing them the perfect life of which they had both dreamed and there was still lots in store for the Mayhew-Grimshaws!


End file.
